Thatkidsam.muffin/VQ

Overview

Thatkidsam E-Mail #36

Brent has a role on this show, you know. Unfortunately, it makes him act exactly like Icreature. That can't be good.

Cast (in order of appearance): Thatkidsam, Rogue Redd, Captain Redd, Icreature, Nocturne, Brent, Quiewtiful Brent, Dr. Besick (easter egg), Director Besick (easter egg)

Places: Masdiktaht Jet

Computer: Sega Dreamcast

Date: April 22nd, 2005

Lines: 55

Transcript

THATKIDSAM: Swirl... Symbol of email! Swirl... Symbol of life!

Hey samuel!
Can you use some special powers to go Viewtiful?

--Mal Australien

THATKIDSAM: {When he reads "samuel" he grumbles a bit} Hm... Mal Australien? Is that some kind of puzzle? Well, it's not Nustraliea... It's not Neilartsua... It's not Jack Mumblerson... Oh well. I give up. {Clears screen} Well, some old person that mistakes me for one of my relatives, I just happen to have a mathematical formula telling you how Viewtiful I can really be!

{Thatkidsam inserts a disc into the Dreamcast. The camera zooms in to show the video Thatkidsam is showing us.}

ROGUE REDD: Hi, watchers. I'm Rogue Redd. I finally got my job on this show, I'm so excited! {Pauses} So, um, the reason you're watching this is because Thatkidsam thinks you're stupid because you don't know about the lurking horrors of the VIEWTIFUL QUOTIENT!

{Horror music plays as those words appear on the screen. They disappear and Redd keeps talking.}

ROGUE REDD: If you want to turn super-cool and awesome like me and start to kick butt, you need to test your V.Q. Just buy one of my liscensed tablets and test yourself!

{A box of Rogue Redd's Home VQ Test pops up.}

ROGUE REDD: If your Viewtiful Quotient is 120 or higher, you can become viewtiful! Just buy one of my specially-liscensed V Units and stick it somewhere on you, you can actiave your V-Powers simply by saying the key word. Let's try it... BANANA BOAT!!

{Rogue Redd transforms into Captain Redd.}

CAPTAIN REDD: And that's how you use your V-Powers! Now, I'm off to do some cool movie shots! ANIME!

{Everything changes to anime-style, and Captain Redd flies off of the screen.}

THATKIDSAM: Well, it turns out that I got a 35 on that test. One of the only tests that I get worse than a Λ on. That's a bad grade. ...But, I do have something else that might satisfy you! Let's test some other people.

{Thatkidsam holds a huge pill up to Icreature.}

ICREATURE: (You want me to swallow that whole thing? Sure thing!)

{Icreature shoots a HUGE laser at the pill, demolishing it and Thatkidsam is burned. Cut to Thatkidsam holding it up to Nocturne.}

THATKIDSAM: Okay... Swallow this with some water.

NOCTURNE: I'M STRONG MAD!!! I'M STRONG MAD!! {Jumps out the window}

{Cut to Thatkidsam testing it with Brent.}

BRENT: Okay! {Crams the pill into his mouth and it is visible as it goes down his throat}

{Brent turns blue.}

THATKIDSAM: Well, that's awesome! You've passed the test and you have 130 V.Q.

BRENT: {Incredibly sick voice} No, I think it's supposed to mean that I'M CHOKING!! {Falls over}

THATKIDSAM: Hm... Maybe I should help him. On the other hand, Icreature's litter needs changing.

{Brent with a neck brace and Thatkidsam are standing in front of the Dreamcast.}

THATKIDSAM: Hey, Brent! I got something for ya!

BRENT: {Very distant voice} Is it a less spiky neck brace? {Starts itching hisself with his foot}

THATKIDSAM: No, it's an email with an attatchment.

{Brent goes up and tries to check the email.}

Dear Brent,
Congraturation on your high VQ test score!
Have one of my patented V Units to stick
somewhere on you!
-Rogue Redd

ATTATCHMENT: vunit.exe

BRENT: So, a V Unit? What do I do with it?

THATKIDSAM: Put it on your neck brace.

{A Commodore 64-font "V" pops out of the screen. Brent grabs it and puts it on his neck brace, and he turns cel-shaded. He also gets a costume change. Rogue Redd walks in.}

ROGUE REDD: Ah, I see you got my attatchment. So, Thatkidsam, your friend can now be Viewtiful, and-

THATKIDSAM: Go away! You've had enough screentime in this email, get out.

ROGUE REDD: But-

THATKIDSAM: GO!

ROGUE REDD: Aw... {Turns Viewtiful}

CAPTAIN REDD: ANIME! {Flies away}

THATKIDSAM: So, uh... {Coughs} Beautiful Brent...

QUIEWTIFUL BRENT: NO! It's Quiewtiful Brent.

THATKIDSAM: And how exactly are fans going to spell that?

QUIEWTIFUL BRENT: Instinct. And, as long as I have my powers, I will show you them. PAUSE! EDIT!

{A mouse cursor appears, controlled by Quiewtiful Brent. It drags Thatkidsam out the window and rotates him. He falls.}

QUIEWTIFUL BRENT: REPLAY!

{Thatkidsam falls over and over, hitting his head repeatedly.}

QUIEWTIFUL BRENT: CUT!

{Thatkidsam is now in front of the Dreamcast with a cast on his leg.}

THATKIDSAM: Well, Austrailian Alien, look what you did to me! You forced me to test Brent, and now he's gone as crazy as Icreature! I hope you're happy!

{The Dreamcast Swirl comes down.}

Easter Eggs

• Click on Brent to see Brent's hospital room.

DR. BESICK: Well, Brent, we've finished the operation. You can freely breathe without the neck brace.

BRENT: That's okay, doctor, I'll keep it.

DR. BESICK: Why keep something you don't need? {Reaches for the neck brace}

BRENT: No! Mine! {Lurches away}

DR. BESICK: It's property of the Free Country Hospital! I'll be taking that. {The robotic hand around his head uncurls and takes the neck brace} Ha ha ha ha ha!!! {Puts it on} Now I can turn viewtiful! SMALLPOX!

{Dr. Besick turns viewtiful and cel-shaded. He laughs.}

DIRECTOR BESICK: Bwa ha ha ha! I control the world now! KILL OFF!

{Brent vanishes.}

DIRECTOR BESICK: CUT!

{Cut back to the Dreamcast.}

Fun Facts

• This is an obvious reference to Viewtiful Joe.
  • The only "VFX" power that is actually in the game is REPLAY, in Viewtiful Joe 2.
• Thatkidsam getting a Λ on his VQ Test is a reference to Takin'_A_Break.exe where Thatkidsam got an Ω on one of his tests, among other Greek letters.
• Rogue Redd was angry at not getting any roles on this show in behind the scenes. It seems that his dreams have been answered.

Author's Comments

• Rating: B+
• Forgive me if some of this VJ stuff is wrong, it's been about a year since I've played. That game is awesome. So, I was kind of sick of myself being in the spotlight while Brent gathers dust, so I let him be the star of Quiewtiful Brent... And speaking of that, that's really, really hard to spell.