Thatkidsam.muffin/custom parts

Overview

Thatkidsam E-Mail #21

Cul yet again sends an email to the wrong address.

Cast (in order of appearance): Thatkidsam, Fashionmore Henchman, ThatkidSamus, Spiris, Dark Lawrence

Places: Fashionmore (Abandoned Storeroom), MMO-RPG

Computer: Wonderswan Touched, PlayStation 832

Date: March 30th, 2005

Lines: 47

Transcript

{Thatkidsam is hiding in an abandoned storeroom in Fashionmore, with police and searchlights outside the window.}

THATKIDSAM: Maybe I went too far with that Grand Theft DSaltine...

FASHIONMORE HENCHMAN: Come out, Thatkidsam! We know you're in there!

THATKIDSAM: Good thing I have Mr. Wonders up here... {Pulls the WonderSwan Touched out and turns it on.} I might be able to send for help! {A bleep is heard. The screen is labeled "1 new unread messages!".} Ooh, I've got mail! {Singing} I check it once, I check it twice, everybody get down with the email!

Ho ThatkidSamus
I think I have a wrong address. If
you're not thatkidsamus Forward
this email. Anyway, I was wondering
If you would care to build strange
items that let you jump high and
for some reason let you destroy
stuff easily
Your fellow bounty hunter

Cul

THATKIDSAM: {Reads completely in monotone, pronounces "Cul" as "Dull".} Oh, that's real great, Dull hampsters. That's just the help I need from some guy in the future! {Taps the screen and forwards it to ThatkidSamus} Ugh... When do people learn??

{A clock flies past the screen, wiping the screen. Cut to 7838, where ThatkidSamus is checking his email with a PlayStation 832.}

THATKIDSAMUS: {Echo} Gotta check it like prime! Check it! Check it!

Ho ThatkidSamus
I think I have a wrong address. If
you're not thatkidsamus Forward
this email. Anyway, I was wondering
If you would care to build strange
items that let you jump high and
for some reason let you destroy
stuff easily
Your fellow bounty hunter

Cul

THATKIDSAMUS: Hey, this is a pretty good email! You mispelled a buncha things, I am ThatkidSamus, and I do, in fact, build those items! I just have to get into a random battle! {Tries to get up, but the screen is pixellated and it is star-wiped} Aaah! A random battle!

{Music starts to play, and an RPG-like screen shows ThatkidSamus going against a Spiris.}

THATKIDSAMUS: Wow! I guess this is what happens when you get out of your chair without saying something funny!

{The menu cursor selects the "ENGINEER" icon, and it lists a lot of usable weapons.}

THATKIDSAMUS: Well, here's some sort of... robot... cube... It's a magical, portable pyramid that I can throw at animals to capture them and make them fight for my glory. {Selects it, and the sprite tosses a green pyramid at the Spiris. The Spiris is contained in the pyramid, and it shakes four times before it sits still.} There! I caught it! Now, you have to come out and do cockfighting for me, m'kay?

{ThatkidSamus opens the pyramid and the Spiris comes out and attatches itself to his face}

THATKIDSAMUS: Well, this is where my other invention comes in. They're leg parts! {Selects "ENGINEER" in the menu again, and selects "SODA SHAKER LEGS".} Okay, so I just turn these on... {His legs start shaking violently, and they squirt brown liquid everywhere. The Spiris is shaken off. Victory music plays, and ThatkidSamus gets out of the random battle.}

THATKIDSAMUS: Yay, I beat the random battle! {Starts walking to the left side of the screen, but is interrupted by a random battle} Ack!

{The battle music plays, and this time a "Shadow Tire" is fighting ThatkidSamus.}

THATKIDSAMUS: Man, this'll be easy. All I have to do is use my brand-new CUSTARD BEAM!!! {Selects "ENGINEER", and selects "CUSTARD BEAM".}

{ThatkidSamus shootsa ton of creamy custard at the Shadow Tire, and a hiss is heard. The custard dissolves the Shadow Tire.}

{Victory music plays, cut back to the PS832.}

THATKIDSAMUS: Well, something tells me I should go to the Galactic Federation to see what is going on. {Turns into a cube and starts "rolling," if you can call it that, to the right side of the screen.}

{Cut to a large building.}

GALACTIC FEDERATION GUY: We're under attack by Dark Lawrence!!!

{The screen is pixellated, and boss music starts to play. ThatkidSamus is up against Dark Lawrence.}

DARK LAWRENCE: Ha! ThatkidSamus? This’ll be easy!

THATKIDSAMUS: Or so you think! Anyway, this is my chance to try out my new ninja suit! {Selects "ENGINEER", then "NINJA SUIT".}

{The screen flashes and ThatkidSamus has a pink ninja suit on and has a flowery sword.}

THAKIDSAMUS: Rats! I accidentally bought the female version! Well, I’ll have to fight like a girl... {Jumps up and pokes Dark Lawrence with the sword}

DARK LAWRENCE: Did I feel something? {Attacks with a dark beam, ThatkidSamus falls over}

{A black screen reading "GAME OVER! PASSWORD: [email protected].}

Easter Eggs

• Click on PASSWORD to test some of ThatkidSamus' custom parts. You can equip any of them to change what he looks like.
• Click on the invisible CONTINUE? at the bottom of the screen to see this scene:

THATKIDSAM: There's no way I'm gonna get caught by those police! Now, let's try a little bit of these SIDE-EFFECT DSALTINES! {Pops one into his mouth and starts inflating} This can't end well... {Thatkidsam breaks the building and pops, spiraling into the sky}

Fun Facts

• This is the first email The Dreamcast Swrirl does not come down.
• The music played in the battles and the boss are from Final Fantasy III (FF6 in Japan).
• The "random battles" occuring every step is poking fun of Final Fantasy (Among other RPGs).
• Shadow Tires are from Homestar Runner Strategy Guide.
• The pyramid that can catch animals is a reference to a generic object in games, including Pokeballs and Robo Cubes.

Author's Comments

• Rating: A
• I just love these Spacewarrior cartoons... This one was pretty fun to make up those custom items... And since I used to be a big contributor to the H*R Strategy Guide, I like to stay true to what reeled me in to the Fanstuff Wiki.

Author Commentary

JESTY: ...and that's why spoons only worship calculators. Whoa, are we on air?

THATKIDSAM: Woah! Yeah. Weird. So... How'd you like this email, L to the J?

EKUL: Oh hey guys! Sorry I'm late. The guy who sent this was me in the future. Or, wait. You recieved it, but hasn't sent it yet. AAAAARRRRRRGGGGHHH!!!!

THATKIDSAM: You sent it to the wrong adress... Wait... You're right... Ugh. I need to stop thinking about stuff like this. It hurts.

JESTY: This is a pretty long email Cul sent. I'm suprised Thatkidsam didn't delete it. Or trim it down to size.

EKUL: {Pant pant} Yeah, that's true. That guy rambles.

THATKIDSAM: I guess I didn't have Edga' Jr. ...Heh. Dull Hamsters. Don't know where that came from.

JESTY: And so now we get to listen to the email again....

THATKIDSAM: {Snoring} Uh? What? Ugh. That's why this isn't in flash.

EKUL: Yeah. That happens quite alot. Well, I guess that happens.

THATKIDSAM: {Talking quickly in monotone} And here comes the Custom Robo reference and OH! IT'S A CUSTOM ROBO REFERENCE!

JESTY: The random battle thing... let's see, we're mixing Metroid games with Final Fantasy games with other games... I never understood Spacewarrior.

EKUL: I always did. Custom Robo Rules, yo. The Sodalegs were the form of the screw attack, I guess.

THATKIDSAM: It used to be Metroid, now it's a lot of things. And the Soda Shaker Legs weren't based off of anything. They're just random. ...Actually, it was meant to be Mega Man, but I couldn't come up with a name. I was thinking I could use "ThatkidSasuke" but I didn't know about Naruto then.

JESTY: The Shadow Tire is weak to the Custard Beam? Does custard stain rubber or something?

THATKIDSAM: Eh... Er... Um... Shut up. I think that was actually an accidental Alex Rider reference. There was this zit cream thing that dissolved rubber.

EKUL: I've heard of custard that can stain stainless steel. As for the soda legs, I'm pretty sure that's what the email was talking about. Cul is hard to understand sometimes, though, so he might have been talking about a popcorn machine.

JESTY: Yeah, I always thouight it was strange how you can't see some huge boss before the battle starts.

THATKIDSAM: I think they fixed that in things like Paper Mario and Tales of Symphonia and countless games before that...

JESTY: Remember the first four altars in Tales of Symphonia, though? Sure, there was mist, but ordinarily three dragonlions don't appear out of thin air.

THATKIDSAM: Okay, you got me. I guess it's like a portal to the netherworld or something...

EKUL: Maybe they can turn invisible. OR maybe they catch a virus called "Loading"

JESTY: Something like that. Heh, Thatkidsamus looks pretty hilarious in that female ninjasuit. Well, the email's almost over...

THATKIDSAM: I did look funny, but we had some controversy about sexism. Well, yay, it's over!