Thatkidsam.muffin/ebay

Overview

Thatkidsam E-Mail #1

Thatkidsam tries to sell some stuff on ebay... This is the humble beginning of thatkidsam.muffin.

Cast (in order of appearance): Thatkidsam, Icreature, Bubs, The Leet, The Cheat (easter egg)

Places: Masdiktaht Jet, The Stick, Bubs' Concession Stand

Computer: Turbo Grafx

Date: March 9th, 2005

Lines: 32

Transcript

THATKIDSAM: {Inserts an E-Mail card into the Turbo Grafx and turns it on} E-Mail is the future! Get with the times!

Dear That Kid Named Sam,
Did you ever try selling
useless stuff on eBay? It's
almost fun!

~Hagurumon

{Reads "Hagurumon" as "Hag... Grewthman."}

THATKIDSAM: {Pressing buttons on the controller} Well, Hag Man, I've pretty much supplied everybody in Free Country with their stuff by selling it on ebay. Now, let's go see how the town is doing...

{The camera zooms out to show that Thatkidsam is in a plane. He slides the door open and jumps out.}

THATKIDSAM: AAAAAAH!!! {Falls a very long way before landing on his face in the Stick.} Ow... I didn't know the plane had taken off yet...

ICREATURE: {Distorted squawking} (Ha, you impaled your head on the stick. Want me to fill the hole with jelly?)

THATKIDSAM: I WHAT!? I thought that was just forgetfulness. {Zooms out to show a hole in his head} Oh well, let's go to Bubs' Concession Stand. {Icreature flies through the hole and it is filled with a strange white substance.}

{Bubs is sitting behind the concession stand while construction workers smash the stand.}

THATKIDSAM: Hey, Bubs! How do you like that concession stan- Hey, why are people destroying it?

BUBS: Renovatin'.

THATKIDSAM: But, the money-

BUBS: Wasted it on some The Cheat. {Holds up an azure The Cheat working on a laptop.}

THE LEET: {Very low-pitched The Cheat noises, sounding like "Me hacker".}

THATKIDSAM: Ugh. Concession stands are worthless to sell on Ebay. People pay 2 cents for them, and then ask for their money back... Then they waste it on something else. Let's see how Marzipan is doing with that fake baby I sold.

ICREATURE: (She never got it. I ate the mail that day.)

THATKIDSAM: Is there anything you DON'T EAT!?

ICREATURE: (Nope. Ha ha ha.)

THATKIDSAM: And all this time, I had something useless to sell on ebay! How much would YOU pay for an Icreature?

ICREATURE: (I doubt you'll be able to make it back to that plane.)

THATKIDSAM: Why?

ICREATURE: {Takes the jelly out of Thatkidsam's head}

THATKIDSAM: Ack! {Falls over}

{Several Turbo Grafx U-Cards line up at the top of the screen displaying the message "Click Here to E-Mail Thatkidsam @ [email protected]"}

Easter Eggs

• Click on Icreature to see The Leet fight The Cheat.

Fun Facts

• Bubs wasting his money on "Some The Cheat" is more proof that there are more The Cheats in the world.
• Thatkidsam selling a fake baby on ebay is a reference to many criminals who sell babies on ebay.

Author's Comments

• Rating: D+
• This was when I didn't really know how to write an email at all. There was little humor, and I didn't know how to make fun of someone's name. (You might see this in other pre-Email 15 emails.)

Author Commentary

DINOSHAUR: Alright. Datkidsam, break it down.

THATKIDSAM: Hey guys, and weclome to the first commentary, with Donoshaur! ...I mean, Dinoshaur. Heh. Joke. Funny. Right? Right?? Well, maybe as funny as this email in general.

DINOSHAUR: I've always wondered how you typed on this computer...

THATKIDSAM: These days were obscure. OBSCURE!! Well, at least the Dreamcast Keyboard made sense. Well, these were the days when I was a better mechanic. All that time travelling really takes something outta you...

DINOSHAUR: You were also a very good actor. I mean, I thought you had actually impaled yourself on a stick! That's how good cosmetics are. Um, I didn't get this Email. What's with the jelly?

THATKIDSAM: I think Icreature morphed some of his odd white jelly-like body and stuck it in my head to stop the blood loss, or something. Yeah, I had a stunt double called Fatkidsam impale himself. Unfortunately, after that incident in email 50, he couldn't do it no more. That easter egg was tough on his body.

DINOSHAUR: Hey, that reminds me, how Ratkidsam? He's pretty cool. I'd pay exty cents for an Icreature.

THATKIDSAM: ...Heh. The Leet. He thinks he'll get another appearance, but he won't.

DINOSHAUR: Yeah, I'll gnaw his face off. Anyways, in short, the classic Emails were crappy.

THATKIDSAM: Yeah. Okay, so... Email everyone, and then... Well... It just depends what you do then.