Thatkidsam.muffin/September 12

Overview

September 12

Fashionmore Henchman gives a speech on the remembrance of... Low prices! And in great remembrance, they're back and better than ever!

Cast (in order of appearance): Fashionmore Henchman, Strong Sad, Rogue Redd

Places: Designated Speech Area

Date: September 12, 2005

Lines: 27

Page Title: In memory of LOW PRICES!!

Transcript

{A Fashionmore Henchman is standing in front of a podium with 16 microphones in front of him. Everything is echoing slightly too much. Cameras flash every few seconds.}

FASHIONMORE HENCHMAN: Today... September 12th, 2005... Is is a very sad day for all us. It is a time when... We shall remember... Those who we dearly miss. {Voice becomes very exciting and caffenated} However, due to great request from several of our customers, they're back and better than ever! That's right, folks: The lowest of lowest prices are BACK!

{Cut to a shiny blue background where several products appear in a circle around a Fashionmore Henchman.}

FASHIONMORE HENCHMAN: Come to our September 12th sale: Only on September 12th! All items are {"40% Off" appears in flashing letters} 40% off!* Come and enjoy the MASSIVE SAVINGS! Also, don't forget to check out the three new stores added to our jam-packed arsenal of booths: Starbucks, Whisk City, SportsPlace, and Starbucks! {The stores he mentioned appear on the screen.} Don't forget to bring your OptimaSavings FashionCard! You'll save an additional 40%** on EVERY SINGLE*** item sold at Fashionmore!

*Actually 1%.
**Also 1%.
***Only applies to TechnoVeggies on sale in the closed thrift store.

{Cut to several other people as they give speeches on the sale.}

STRONG SAD: I think this is a disgrace to our country. This is a horrible mock-up of September 11th and all the people who died and-

{The screen cuts to Rogue Redd.}

ROGUE REDD: I have to look my best when I'm dressing up as tall kids, fighting innocent people, and trying to hang out with Thatkidsam, so this sale will be VERY beneficial to my-

{The screen cuts to a Fashionmore Henchman with a slightly different outfit and a fake mustache.}

FASHIONMORE HENCHMAN: The public will obviously love our {Coughs and looks around} I mean, Fashionmore's sales. It can only be beneficial to those buying our... their products like MegaWhisks and KidClayPots.

{The screen cuts back to the Fashionmore Henchman in the Designated Speech Area.}

FASHIONMORE HENCHMAN: I say that we should all embrace those we have lost: For we have had our hearts broken, but not our {Voice turns excited again} wallets! That's right, people: Your money has not been lost!* Spend it all at Fashionmore this September 12th!

AUDIENCE MEMBER: But it's 11:59 and-

Fashionmore Henchman: {Whispering} Be quiet and get $500.

*Unless you live in the following cities: Atlanta, Georgia; Tampa, Florida; New York, New York; Winter Haven, Florida; Free Country, USA.

Fun Facts

• This is an obvious reference to The September 11th attacks.
• Rogue Redd's remark about dressing like tall kids is a reference to convention.