Difference between revisions of "RiffText/Wiki User Email Zoo977/programs"

Latest revision as of 17:43, 30 December 2012

About

CAST: Dot, Xaviar, Zoo, doodles of albino and zoo (easter egg), Yvonne, Zorax, Albino, Marissa, Nicholas, Wendy
SETTING: The deck, the suite

Transcript

{cuts to the deck of the boat. dot is looking through a telescope. xaviar is behind her}

XAVIAR: Face it, Dot! Zoo's gone!

REMOLAY: Yes, face it so that we may be free of this torture.

REMADIN: I'm sorry, I want even crappy love stories to have happy endings.
REMOLAY: Remadin, did you like Twilight?

REMADIN: ONLY THE NOVELS!

DOT: Just like Vinera is!

REMOLAY: Who?
REMADIN: I'm sure she appeared in maybe one earlier email, but yeah. Who?

XAVIAR: Oh, I know she's alive!

DOT: There!

XAVIAR: What did I tell you?

REMADIN: Never to be the first one to stick your hand in a viscous material.

REMOLAY: What?

REMADIN: I don't know. I never actually saw that movie.

DOT: A lie! {yelling} Stay calm! {grabs a life preserver. throws it into the water.}

REMOLAY:In the opposite direction as Zoo.

REMADIN: You're getting lazier in the ways you kill off Zoo, you know.

REMOLAY: Yeah, well we're also doing these later and later at night

XAVIAR: He's alive?

{the line on the life preserver tightens}

DOT: {grabbing the rope} Pull!

{Remolay fires a catapult}

REMADIN: How long has that been under your chair?

REMOLAY: Since episode one! Did you really think I'd be able to pass up this opportunity?

{xaviar pulls the rope with dot. the life preserver raises, revealing zoo on the preserver. his mouth is stuffed with sea shells}

DOT: Zoo! {runs up to zoo. the two hug}

XAVIAR: Blech. {throws a fish on the ground. zoo and dots eyes widen. they then begin kicking xaviar}

{Remadin stares in horror}
REMOLAY: Wh- What the hell... Did we just walk into a bad creepypasta?

What did I do?

DOT: What happened?

ZOO977: Wait, why aren't you angry?

REMADIN: Yes. completely ignore the senseless act of violence that even the self proclaimed king of senseless violence was confused by.

DOT: Albino told me what you were telling me! I realised you were

REMOLAY: Bribing him to keep it a secret! I pulled you up here to push you back in the water when sharks came near you bastard!

telling the truth!

ZOO977: Yay!

REMADIN: Zoo, how old were you when you wrote this again?

{cuts back to the suite. zoo, dot, and xaviar walk in.}

DOT: Well, I have to get some sleep for my birthday! Good night! {walks into her room.

REMOLAY: Zoo joins her.
REMADIN: Will you stop that. We're probably already on multiple watchlists for jokes like this already.

xaviar walks into his, as zoo sits in the bochee court. he opens the packy}

ZOO977: Sailing toward emails in three, two, one! {opens an email}

Dear Zoo,
When you opened this email, you let in a unstoppable virus!
Your computer is doomed no matter what!
MWAHAHAHAHAHAHEHEHE!
Evilly yours,
The Virus

REMOLAY:Hooray!

ZOO977: {laughs} A doomed computer?!? That was part of the hacking! Not to mention the Y ware {holds up a discette with yvonne on it} I installed actually helps the programming!

REMOLAY: So you installed software that facilitates viruses...
REMADIN: I see absolutely no flaw with this plan.

ALBINO: {only heard} Okay, bring in the balloons!

ZOO977: What?

{a zoom out shows zorax and albino putting up some balloons.}

ZOO977: What are you doing?

ZORAX: Putting up balloons!

REMADIN: And this has to do with the email because...

ZOO977: Be sure to use some super helium, and put trinkets in them.

REMADIN: Ah, of course. Total bullshit. Carry on.

ZORAX: Ok?

ZOO977: {returning to typing} Anyways, I think your virus needs to have a checkup. Look at some of the programs on my computer!

{cuts to a view of fireworks}

ZOO977: First off, theres Fireworks CS4. While it's a very advanced graphics program

{Remadin and Remolay laugh uncontrollably}
REMADIN: That was the best joke I've ever read. Thank you Zoo. Thank you very much

, it actually makes omputers more vulnerable to virus's.

REMADIN: More vulenrable to virus's what?
REMOLAY: Sounds like his computer is safe though.

{cut to a view of the newer microsoft word, xcel, and powerpoint.}

ZOO977: And then there's the newest version of Word, Excel, and Powerpoint! While they are {the sound of gwen from total drama island is heard faintly}

REMOLAY: I give exactly no shits who Gwen is or what Total Drama Island is.

REMADIN: It's an inexplicably popular Canadian cartoon show that's actually complete garbage.
REMOLAY: Oh, like ReBoot.

REMADIN: Oy. I liked ReBoot.

nice programs, they're just another door key. Wait, whats that?

{cuts to the suite view. albino is watching Total Drama Island.}

ZOO977: Albino, what are you doing?

REMADIN: Watching crap

ALBINO: I dunno.

REMOLAY: LIAR! Throw him in the pit of eternal late fees!

ZOO977: Weren't you just putting up birthday decorations?

ALBINO: Everythings up.

{zoo looks around. tons of decorations are on the walls}

ZOO977: I'm not even gonna ask.

</blockquote>REMADIN: I don't get it. I just don't get it. Is this what Zoo thought a joke was?</blockquote>

{cuts to a view of Flash.}

ZOO977: Ah, good old flash.

REMADIN: Good ol' clunky ol' works-only-a-fraction-of-the-time ol' flash

Truthfully, it's like a sponge collecting virus's!

REMOLAY: My knowledge of computers outside of hyper-violent video games may be extremely limited, but I'm pretty sure viruses don't work that way.
REMADIN: Why isn't the plural of virus "viri"?

{cuts back to the normal view}

ZOO977: And then there's Y wear. It hs bugs built in so that you have to go out and buy the next version, with more bugs, and a higher price!

REMADIN: Every Adobe product.

I bought stock, and boy, am I raking in money! Well, it's almost morning. {sends the email, closes the laptop.}

{cuts to the next morning. dot opens the door to her room. she walks out, and yawns.}

EVERYONE BUT XAVIAR AND DOT: Happy birthday!

DOT: Yay!

{the kids begin going insane as the scrreen fades to black.}

REMADIN: Well that was an incredibly underwhelming ending.
REMOLAY: I like the added insanity at the end though

Easter Eggs

Click on the telescope to see Dot looking at the railings on the boat

Click on dot when she mentions albino to see a badly drawn comic. the first frame has him talking. the next has them wearing suits. the remaining frames are all worn out.

REMOLAY: Worst. Easter Eggs. Ever.

Fun facts

• Dots birthday has been mentioned for the last few emails.
• The virus's built in is a refference to the comic Foxtrot.
• Gwen from Total Drama Island is heard.
• Zoo has every program mentioned but Y wear.

REMOLAY: I'm going to punch these fun facts in the face until they are fun.
REMADIN: Go ahead. I'm not going to stop you this time

The wierdo's revealed Anime, Crazy train, Challange, Elephant, Dot, Diet, Money, Larry, A or B, Cereal, Grammer, Transform, Bicee, Cry The anger in the nutshell Destruction, Name, Jungle, Conondrum, The baloney man, Blast from the Past 1, 2, 3, Beach, Superhero, Zaland, Current Events, Meat, Adult, Revenge, Hack Hidden talents Hatred, Cream, Allergies, Some fame, Cooking, Burfday, Sacrifice, Atlantis, Programs, Music, Hell, Water park, Fenri, Dancing, Energy The maloa cronicles Happy, Suzuki, Counterfiet, Magic, Favorites, Rumors, Extreme, Chris, Izzy, Attempt, Directions, Soap, Reality, Kaboom, Strong Intelligent Marissa takes over Taste, Zoo, Funeral, The island, Disaster, Kalt, New, Plans, Not goodnessosity, Last chance, Arrival, What's christmas?, Neglect, Planning, Packing A vacation to remember Planeport, Ouch, Animals, At home, Plants, Fourth class