Conshow/43

Summary

Chrionroar's Super Special Awesome Idiotic Adventure!

Transcript

{Open to the base - lobby, Conchris opens a cupboard and pulls out a cereal box, he tilts it over the bowl to see only dust come out}

CONCHRIS: Okay, who ate all the cereal?

{Conchris walks over to Cruroar and grabs him by the neck}

CONCHRIS: Was it you?!

CRUROAR: Oh no! It wasn't me!

{Conchris throws Cruroar onto the floor and grabs Nydara by the neck analogue}

CONCHRIS: Was it YOU?!

NYDARA: Hey! I never touched it!

{Conchris drops Nydara and grabs Forest by the neck}

CONCHRIS: Was it... YOU?!

FOREST: {Cave Story Intro} (It wasn't me, you dolt!)

{Conchris drops Forest onto the floor and stands on top of the table}

CONCHRIS: Then who did it?

{Cieeia peeks her head around the door}

CIEEIA: It was me!

{Everybody starts laughing, Conchris falls off and lands onto the couch somehow}

CRUROAR: Is there something interesting we're supposed to be doing today?

CONCHRIS: Nah, screw it.

CIEEIA: But what about the viewers? What if they send us angry letters about how this episode doesn't match the quality of the others?

CONCHRIS: Eh, the writer will find a way...

{Fade to Sirhcnoc's Lair on a hill on Earth, Sirhcnoc is anxiously pacing back and forth with Greg watching}

GREG: What's wrong?

SIRHCNOC: Being a villain and having no heroes to fight is boring. I mean, having total control over Wikity is fun and all but it isn't very rewarding without those guys...

GREG: You're saying that you actually miss the good guys?

SIRHCNOC: Yes... I mean... NO! NO! No. I don't.

GREG: {at a computer} Too late!

{Sirhcnoc gets onto his knees}

SIRHCNOC: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! {coughs}

{Intro}

{Open to the barren planet from Episode 31, Chrionroar's ship lands and Chrionroar and company walk out, only to fall over}

ARIA: GACK! You didn't tell us that this planet is dangerous!

MR. PERSON: Yeah! {chokes}

CHRIONROAR: {gets up} I doesn't afraid of anything. I search.

{Chrionroar runs up to Nydara's ex-house and smells the footprints}

CHRIONROAR: Footprints. They human. Conches and company here.

ARIA: Whoa, really?!

CHRIONROAR: Been here.

ARIA: Good.

{Chrionroar walks in and finds a radar which is bleeping}

ARIA: {chokes} What's that?

CHRIONROAR: It radar for ship. Conches might've left planet with ship.

ARIA: Well? Where should we go?

CHRIONROAR: We follow signal.

{Chrionroar picks up Aria and Mr. Person and shoves them back into the spaceship, it then takes off}

{Cut to the base, Cruroar is lying on the couch as Conchris walks in}

CONCHRIS: You know how we can liven this place up?

CRUROAR: You just said that we aren't doing anything interesting today.

CONCHRIS: Your mom told me to! Besides, I have a perfect plan!

CRUROAR: {sighs} What?

CONCHRIS: How about we build a very big machine underground and threaten to start it up to make people fear us?

CRUROAR: That's a stupid idea. Now leave me be, I need some sleep.

CONCHRIS: Everyone's boring today!

{Cut to a random planet, the spaceship lands and Chrionroar and company get off}

ARIA: What is this place?

MR. PERSON: This must be one of the space malls for whatever reason.

ARIA: Uh, awesome?

{Sarry Bcott quickly dashes on screen}

SARRY: Hi! Sarry Bcott here! Owner of this here space mall! What do you guys need?

MR. PERSON: We need lasers. Lots and lots of lasers.

{Sarry looks at Mr. Person, confused}

SARRY: Er... okay? But we aren't violent people. And besides, how could you see the lasers in space anyway?

ARIA: Wait, how are we even surviving in deep space?

MR. PERSON: Don't even think about asking!

ARIA: Too late!

MR. PERSON: DAMN!

CHRIONROAR: Run inside, quick.

{Chrionroar and company quickly run inside the space mall as a shadowy figure watches from above}

FIGURE: I'll show them. I'll show them all that I can be the greatest villain in the universe! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! {coughs} Wow, my throat hurts.

{Cut to the base - lobby, Cruroar quickly darts in wearing a backpack}

CRUROAR: Okay! I had enough of this no adventure crap! I'm going on an actual adventure with people and it will star just about every celebrity.

CONCHRIS: That sounds like that one dream I had where I had an adventure like that. It was boring and non-inspired...red...ed... err...

CRUROAR: Also, Conchris, you are not invited to go!

CONCHRIS: What?! But every adventure must have me! I mean, I can...

CRUROAR: Save it.

CONCHRIS: I'll sue you in court!

CRUROAR: I'd like to see you tr-

{Cut to the courthouse, the judge bangs his gavel}

JUDGE: GUILTY!

CONCHRIS: Ha ha ha! You lost!

CRUROAR: We just got in here and he just said "GUILTY!" right before anybody talked!

CONCHRIS: That's the power of the law working its way upwards to your face.

CRUROAR: This episode is getting worse by the minute. I hope it ends soon.

CONCHRIS: Damn it! We need some good ideas! Hold on a second...

{Pause}

CRUROAR: Well?

CONCHRIS: According to my head and oh so definitely not Wikipedia, the writer is suffering from Writer's Block again.

CRUROAR: Well, that's just great.

{Cut to the space mall in deep space, Chrionroar and company walk in and looks around}

MR. PERSON: This place seems suspiciously deserted. Help me look for clues gang!

ARIA: What?

CHRIONROAR: Shush! I hear voice.

{Chrionroar grabs Aria and Mr. Person and hides in a bush, he peeks out to see Xavian talking to a strange creature}

CREATURE: Are you sure that Earth will just give up to us?

XAVIAN: Yes, I'm very sure about this.

CREATURE: Excellent. What about your puppet, Sirhcnoc?

XAVIAN: Ha ha ha! Yeah! I remember now! That jerk, always topping me in class back at school. All I want is delicious revenge...

CREATURE: Okay, here's the dealeo. You lead the war and give people false hope, then give up within seven hours. Then you can become the administrator of Earth and get a freaking huge citadel. Sounds cool?

ARIA: That sounds like a plot to a game with game of the year stamped on it.

CREATURE: Why yes. Yes it is. {notices Chrionroar and company in the bush} INTRUDERS! Get them!

{Several robots pile on top of Chrionroar and the gang, the creature then turns to face Xavian}

CREATURE: Sorry about that. Anyway, we also get Earth as a price for your plan, right?

XAVIAN: Agreed. Did you have any trouble conquering planets before?

CREATURE: Well, we did. But then we destroyed the world!

XAVIAN: That totally breaks the Galactic Code {holds up a book reading "Galactic Code" and then throws it away} but I like it.

ARIA: You'll never get away with this!

XAVIAN: Frankly, my dear. I already did. Now, friend, laugh evilly with me!

XAVIAN and CREATURE: {as Chrionroar and company are taken away on a ship} Mwhahahahahahahahaha... HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAAAAA!

{The laughter echoes as the screen fades to the base on the mobile planet}

{Cut to the lobby, a window is open to reveal an arena-like area, Cruroar is fighting with Forest, despite him getting beat down.}

NYDARA: Are you sure that he will be alright?

CONCHRIS: Pfft. He'll be alright. Although I don't really listen to safety procedures. That's how Forest has an advanced array of weaponry {pauses to think} and...

NYDARA: Enough already! But do you think that girl will kill you for doing this to him?

CONCHRIS: No. Because she's a girl, her opinion about him doesn't count. That's because... {a knife hits Conchris in the head and he falls over}

{Pan to the right to reveal Cieeia}

CIEEIA: I was expecting your head to be emptier than that!

CONCHRIS: {off-screen} Yeah, except you used a butter knife on me and not a sharp one.

CIEEIA: Umm... What about Cruroar?

CONCHRIS: He's having fun down there.

{Pause as Cruroar's screams echo through the window}

CONCHRIS: Yeah, fun.

CIEEIA: You call being killed by a robot fun?! Let him out now!

CONCHRIS: Fine! Sheesh!

{Conchris presses a button that opens the door and Cruroar is let out, he quickly runs up to Conchris and punches him in the gut, making him keel over}

CRUROAR: Jerk.

CONCHRIS: Ow...

NYDARA: I think we should end this episode before it gets more violent.

CIEEIA: Agreed.

{Fade to Sirhcnoc's Lair on a Hill on Earth, Sirhcnoc is at the control panel with Greg}

GREG: So, you're saying that this thing has the power to destroy entire worlds?

SIRHCNOC: Well, from what I can understand, yes.

GREG: What about that rumoured "Staff of Life" I keep hearing about?

SIRHCNOC: Staff of what?

GREG: {pauses} Nevermind.

SIRHCNOC: Also, I'd like to show you my newest creation!

GREG: {monotonous} Oh boy, I can't wait.

{Sirhcnoc throws the cloth off the table to reveal a kettle}

SIRHCNOC: I call this one "The Kettlinator"!

{Greg inspects the kettle for a bit before eyeing Sirhcnoc strangely}

GREG: What the hell? Is this another robot?

THE KETTLINATOR: I want to make tea... {suddenly pulls out an arm cannon} AND DESTROY ALL HUMANITY! {shoots Sirhcnoc and Greg off the screen before growing legs and running away}

{Cue credits}