Spyro email/DS Cyberspace

Spyro Email #7: "DS Cyberspace"

Summary: Spyro gets locked in DS cyberspace and come upon a new foe.

Cast (in order of appearance): User:Spyrox6, Strong Bad, Homestar, Exit, Hunter, 1-Up, Stinkoman, Chorch, Grundy, Jaro, Bad boy, Drake, Tampo, The Platnium Poorbt, Dragon P. 2.0

Places: Spyro's room, Booth, Race track, Spyro's Exit, Spyro's Porch, Stinkoman's Ship, Jaro's ship, Stinkomans Exit, Stinkoman's Room.

Length: 194 Lines

Date: January 2, 2005

Transcript

File:DScyberscreenshot.png

{A note is taped on Spyro’s computer}

NOTE: I went to get paid by being a WI-FI announcer NPC for 10 bucks an hour. With a new invention that sucks you into the game. Made by a mysterious person. You can’t see him until the end of the episode. GOLLY! Did I just break the 4th wall?

{Zooms down showing another note}

OTHER NOTE: Apparently so. And Golly Gee Willikers is a Skateboard move I made up. Gee, isn’t life small?

NOTE: What the-What are you doing here?

OTHER NOTE: Did you just say doyng?

NOTE: Uh-oh, I’m out of sticky notes. This is your fault that I can’t say a pun.

{Cut’s to the Mario Kart game where Spyro is in the announcer booth.}

SPYRO: Good afternoon people who are playing. I’m Spyro here with the one and only Strong bad.

STRONG BAD: Good afternoon ladies and dorks. I can’t believe that you get paid 10 bucks an hour doing this!

SPYRO: Yeah well, I can’t believe it’s not butter!

STRONG BAD: What? {Turning head}

SPYRO: Moving on.

{Cut’s to racetrack where it cut’s to all different angles of the racers.}

SPYRO: {off-screen} Racer number one, Peachy! {Cut’s to Homsar in a mini kart} Playing as…uhh, Homsar. I can’t believe Homsar is a racer.

STRONG BAD: {also off-screen} I can’t believe he gets paid!

SPYRO: I still can’t believe it’s not butter.

STRONG BAD: Shut up. That joke gets old after a while.

SPYRO: Well, I can't defend myself with that comment, so lets read Peachy’s profile. {Starts reading}

{Cuts to Peachies profile}

Age: Unknown
Wins: Maybe Power ball
Loses: Pride of the Peaches
Catchphrase: DaaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaAa

{Cut’s back to the booth and Spyro is still reading the catchphrase}

SPYRO: AaAaAaAAAaaAAaAaa-

STRONG BAD: Shut up! Let me do the rest.

{Cuts to Mario in a kart}

STRONG BAD: Racer 2: Pork Meat.

SPYRO: Pork meat? I met him. It’s his first time. And I don’t know his age. Oh yeah, his Catch Phrase is Oink.

STRONG BAD: Whoa, the race is about to start!

{Cuts to racer #3 and 4}

SPYRO: OMG! {Pronounces it Oh Em Gee} {Quickly} 3rd is Bad Boy the Drybones, and last is Drake the Luigi. GO!

STRONG BAD: And they all boost out of the line!

{Cuts to different angles of all racers}

SPYRO: {off-screen} Whoa em gee! They’re all in first!

STRONG BAD: {off-screen} And they all have Blue Spiked shells! Ohhohoho! This could get cool

HOMESTAR: {off-screen} Hey guys, is the Super Giants Video?

{You hear Homstar getting tossed and he appears on track}

HOMESTAR: Oh, I just wanted to tell them that Strong Bads Fondue Pot will explode. I have it with me to prove it! {Holds out the fondue pot}

{Cuts back to the booth}

SPYRO: No wait homestar! {Pause} Nothing is happening.

{Cuts to Homestar}

HOMESTAR: Cool, I somehow stole these blue shells. And I’m ahead of everyone.

{Cuts back to the booth}

SPYRO: Why is he summarizing what’s happening? And how do we hear him?

STRONG BAD: He’s a moron.

SPYRO: Oh yeah. Well, {freaking out} We got to get out of here before he causes a mass explosion!

STRONG BAD: Don’t worry. This place has a finger scanner. We’ll be out of here in no time.

SPYRO: AHHH! We don’t have fingers

STRONG BAD: Then-

{There is a big explosion and Spyro, Strong Bad, Homestar, and all 4 racers are flying through the air}

ALL: Ahhhhhhhh!

{Spyro finds his DS exit}

SPYRO: Aha! {Lands} Open please.

EXIT: We’re sorry, but your exit is protected by a Firewall.

SPYRO: Oh. Well I’m gonna douse with a hose.

EXIT: We’re sorry, but your exit is protected by an Electricwall.

SPYRO: What about a earth ray?

EXIT: Darkwall.

SPYRO: Light ray?

EXIT: Grasswall.

SPYRO: Fire ray?

EXIT: Your Signed photo of Paris Hilton.

SPYRO: {Angry} What! Who could be doing this?

{Cuts to the front door of Spyro's house with a package at the steps and words that say “Earlier Today”. Hunter opens the door}

HUNTER: Hey! My hacking booklet that I ordered. Just in time. {Baffled} Who is Paris Hilton? Why did I think of that?

{Cuts back to Spyro}

SPYRO: I need to get out of here. So can you open these walls?

EXIT: No. Though I can get you out of Stinkyman’s-

SPYRO: {correcting} Stinkoman.

EXIT: {oblivious} Sticklyman’s DS. Stickyman-

SPYRO: {correcting} STINKOMAN!

EXIT: {still oblivious} Strechyman’s DS is 50 feet away in the real world. But 50 feet converts in cyberspace, um, BUFFERING RAM! {Pause. Zooms in to the Exit’s sound output} 12 miles.

{Cuts to Spyro with a shocked look}

SPYRO: So where do I go?

{Cuts outside below the exit place. Spyro is ejected out by a trapdoor, and luckily falls into Stinkomans ship. Then cuts inside the ship}

1-UP: Hey Spyro. I haven’t saw you since the Episode about the Freeze ray!

SPYRO: Anyways, I need to get to your DS.

STINKOMAN: We can’t. 1-UP and I, Strechyman {Spyro gives a Lost and confused face} have gotten paid for testing this unfinished game. As our duty as Alpha-Testers-

SPYRO: {cutting of} Er, do you mean Beta-Testers?

STINKOMAN: Whaaaat? No. We mean Alpha-Testers.

SPYRO: {sarcastically} So, is there a Delta-Testers?

STINKOMAN: Well, yeah. {Pointing out the window} They’re testing another game.

{Zooms quickly with a moving motion to another ship with a Jaro, a Chorch, and a Grundy from Jaro emails}

CHORCH: So, why did we become Delta-Testers?

GRUNDY: I really didn’t know there was such a thing.

JARO: Well, I think the real Spyro wanted us in the emails, but I can’t say anything offensive or stupid to not offend Nachoman.

{A wall falls on him}

VOICE: BREAK FORTH WALL!

JARO: OW I-

GRUNDY: You know, we have six walls in this ship.

{Cut’s back to Stinkoman’s ship}

SPYRO: Why are you testing a unfinished game?

1-Up: We get paid!

SPYRO: By who? {pause} Come to think of it, whom do I get paid by?

{cut’s the whole room}

ALL: I don’t know. That was weird. George Washington. Who is George Washington? Ahh! We did it again! JIBNEY!

{cuts to a close up side angle of Spyro’s head}

SPYRO: Hey, who’s that out the window? {shows another ship seen out the window}

STINKOMAN: Hey! It’s Valkeria testers! Peachy, Bad boy and Drake

SPYRO: Valkeria isn’t a Latin Letter. Shouldn’t it be Gamma-testers?

1-UP: No, because they made this game.

SPYRO: No way! Three people can’t make a video game!

STINKOMAN: Foolish Spyro. Those three people have the Supercom, which can do anything!

SPYRO: The SuperCom! They fixed it!

{Bad Boys head appears on the screen}

BAD BOY: Yes the Super Com. I know your shocked I stole one of Tampo's computers, well one of his computers, anyways, your probably thinking I’m Tampo in disguise. Well, I’m not, I want to be the best gamer when I make this unfinished game.

SPYRO: Hey, If you’re not Tampo, why do I see your body bulging out of your fake costume?

BAD BOY: What? That ridiculous-{the camera zooms out in the screen} Don’t zoom out, Drake!

DRAKE: Well, do you really want Spyro emails to be longer than yours?

BAD BOY: Well no. Ok then. {Tampo comes out of the disguise} Hahaha! Fools!

STINKOMAN: No way. How did you fit in that costume?

1-UP: No wait, It’s not Tampo.

SPYRO: It’s not?

1-UP: No {cuts to 1-Ups head with a think bubble appears over 1-Up’s head showing Pudding with boxing gloves and pizza with boxing gloves fighting. The pudding eventually wins.} Tampo is pink. He’s Magenta. Also if he were to fit in the costume, the costume must be made of super stretchy underwear. Underwear is made in 2005, which is obsolete. So how on earth can Tampo fit in the costume if there is no underwear around anymore?

{Cuts to the whole room}

STINKOMAN: How do you know all of this?

1-UP: I like learning, it’s fun.

{random people appear around the edges of the screen}

PEOPLE: Because knowledge is power!

{Cuts to the screen}

TAMPO: He’s right. I’m not Tampo. I’m-

{Tampo somehow undo’s his zipper revealing a Poorbt made of Platinum}

POORBT: The Platinum Poorbt! {Maniacally} Ahahahahaha {coughs}.

{Cuts to a lower angle of Spyro, Stinkoman and 1-Up.}

SPYRO: So why are you here?

{Cuts to the Platinum Poorbt}

PLATNIUM POORBT: I have come to destroy Stinkoman.

{Cuts to Spyro}

SPYRO: Why?

{Cuts to Platinum Poorbt}

PLATNUM POORBT: Master Saargtsson orders. {Cut’s to a flashback with the Platinum Poorbt’s head still in the bottom left corner. The Platinum Poorbt is summarizing what’s going on in the flashback} I was a low life poorbt trying to destroy Stinkoman. I still wasn’t in the army, until I uncovered a Platinum mine hidden in the Lava zone. As a thanks, I was sauntered in Platinum by Master Saargtsson and put me in the army. But then Stinkoman came and injured Master Saargtsson closing the army. With no place to go, I traveled the land searching for Stinkoman to repay what you did to my Master. {the flashback ends} But now I found you. And your friend! You do not understand. I gave you the entrance to DS cyberspace. Well actually Drake made it and gave it to you. But you will pay!

SPYRO: {off-screen} Hey, who are the other guys?

PLATINUM POORBT: {shouting} Were you listening! {calming} I mean, that’s regular Drake and Peachy. But that doesn’t matter I will annihilate you guys!

{Cut’s to 1-Up at the window}

1-Up : Hey Spyro! That other ship sure seems to have a lot of guns and lazers!

{Cut’s to the Platinum Poorbt’s ship with 50 lazers pointing at Stinkomans ship. Then cuts to Spyro in the middle of the room}

SPYRO: {heroically} Never fear! I know a friend who can save the day! {he gets out a kazoo and plays it. Seconds later the Dragon P. 2.0 with the 3D printer attached to it breaks through the walls of Stinkoman’s ship}

DRAGON P 2.0: Did someone say the Kazoo noise?

SPYRO: Yes Dragon. Print out my freeze ray to destroy the ship!

DRAGON P. 2.0: Er, we can’t. Stinkoman already Double Deuced the ship, and it got away.

SPYRO: Oh. {pause} To the Stinkoman ship!

{A Super hero transition scene is done with the ship being the object in the center. It then cuts back to the same place}

DRAGON P. 2.0: We’re already in the Stinkoman ship.

SPYRO: Oh. {pause} To Stinkoman’s DS exit!

{Another Super hero transition scene is done with the ship being the object in the center. It then cuts to Stinkomans exit with everyone there.}

STINKOMAN: Well we did it. Another days work guys. Lets go home.

SPYRO: Wait. I got to check an email. Dragon P. 2.0, check email.

{Cuts to the screen}

Subject: Tansport

Dear Spyro,
Want something to transport you in a DS?
Meet me somewhere.

STINKOMAN: Spyro, check your emails earlier.

SPYRO: Yeah I should. This email is unnecesary.

{Cuts to the Stinkomans room. Everyone exits a portal that came out of nowhere.}

SPYRO: {kissing the floor} I’m free! Hahaha! Yeah! Take that hacker!

1-UP: Hacker? What hacker?

SPYRO: Well my exit was being guarded by my signed photo of Paris Hilton.

STINKOMAN: {hysterically} Hahaha! Hahaha! Hahaha! I have about 21 of those!

1-UP: Irony! And Pudding!

{The paper comes down}

Easter Eggs

• Click on Spyro at the end to see a I can't belive it is butter product cutscene.

SPYRO: {holding a container} I can't believe it is butter!

HUNTER: {off-screen} Well duh. It is butter.

Fun Facts

Explanation

• A FireWall is a computers protection on the internet.

Inside References

• The SuperCom was Tampo's old computer.

Real World References

• I can't belive it's not butter is a butter product.
  • Spyro saying I can't believe it's not butter is a reference to the Family Guy episode: Eight Resons on buying my teenage daughter.
• The game Spyro was in was Mario Kart.
• When Stinkoman refers to the "Valkeria-Testers" as the highest ranking, that would reference to Yu-Gi-Oh where the Magnet Wariors, Alpha, Beta, and Gamma would come together, and they would become Valkeria, a devestating monster.

Rating

</tr>