Spyro email/Threats 3

Spyro mail #25: Spyro handles the 3rd threat email. 3rd? What happened to the 2nd?

Cast (in order of appearance): Announcer, Spyro, Drake, Sarah, 1-Up, Peachy, Stinkoman, Drive thru Whale, Kermit the frog, Sonic the Hedgehog, Death, Mayor, Poopsmith.

Places: Spyro's Room, field, Tron Universe, Ouside Stinkomans house, Train Station, Conductors room, Mayors Mansion.

Computer: Dragorange Q 1.2

Date: April 5, 2007

Number of Lines: 138

Transcript

{Shows a black screen with the following written:}

ANNOUNCER: Previously {Pronounces it Prev-eye-ausly} on Spyro email.

{Cuts to a badly drawn Spyro standing in his room.}

SPYRO: {Voice acted by someone else badly} Oh no. That robber took my trophy and my pants.

{Cuts to Drake drawn in Anime style, with an extreme close up.}

DRAKE: {Voice acted with a deeper pitch} You! What are you doing here?

{Quickly pans over to an anime Sarah.}

SARAH: {Also voiced acted deeper} Because I have to stop you from marrying that volcano!

{Cuts to normal Peachy and 1-Up standing in a field. The word “Fight” drops down from the top of the screen and fades immediately.}

1-UP: IMA FIRIN MA LAZOR!

{1-Up shoots a massive wave of laser energy from his mouth knocking Peachy off-screen. Then cuts to a blue Tron styled background. Spyro and Stinkoman pop up from underneath.}

SPYRO: Where are we?

STINKOMAN: We’re at a fast food service! {He falls over with a snapping noise occurring} Ow!

{The Drive Thru whale leans over from the right side of the screen.}

DRIVE THRU WHALE: Thank you for your patronage on this greatest day.

{Static. Cuts to Drake with a huge pile of boxes inside Stinkomans house.}

DRAKE: Hey juys! Guess what! I purchased every lava lamp in the world! I also have been crowned Prime Minister of anything 10 feet within my range! I win!

{Static to 1-Up and Stinkoman.}

1-UP: Hey! I’ve got this great idea!

STINKOMAN: Does it involve a challenge?

1-UP: No! Shoop da Whoop!

{The same laser that 1-Up fired at Peachy fires at Stinkoman knocking him off-screen. Cuts to what appears to be a badly drawn Kermit the Frog and Sonic the Hedgehog standing at The Stick.}

KERMIT THE FROG: {In Drakes voice} Hey, dude! You look different! Did you get a hair cut? No, no, wait! You got a new deodorant product.

SONIC THE HEDGEHOG: {In Bad Boy’s voice} No. I got 10% off my car washing products!

KERMIT THE FROG: {Drakes voice} Oh! That makes me very jealous and envious.

OFFSCREEN VOICE: You Sinner!

{A bolt of lightning comes down and smites Kermit into ash. Cuts to Stinkoman hanging upside down from the ceiling.}

STINKOMAN: What does the scanner say about his power level.

{A flash occurs and Spyro is now where Stinkoman was.}

SPYRO: It’s-

{1-Up races On-Screen}

1-UP: Lazor Camera Beams!

{The lasers once again are fired at the camera occurring in a loud explosion. Cuts to Spyro lying on his bed and immediately waking up. The explosions fade out quickly.}

SPYRO: Gah! {takes a few breaths} What the heck? {He looks at his neck noticing that there’s a tranquilizer dart attached to him. He pulls it out.} Dag. What was I doing when I was awake?

DRAKE: {Off-screen} You’re awake?

{Pans left showing Drake at the door.}

DRAKE: Dang. You’ve been out cold for a while. But the good news is, I killed the Jaro, and mounted his head on a plaque.

{Pans left showing a Jaros visor nailed to a plaque that is nailed to a hanging gold medal.}

DRAKE: See?

{Pans back right showing both people.}

SPYRO: Oh, right. What was happening during that time? I can’t remember.

DRAKE: {The camera slowly zooms in to him} Well it all started when you came home from that rite challenge, {Zooms back to normal view quickly} But after that is a long story. So long, it could be written in 7 pages in word for your homework assignment. But in the end, you had the barrel of a tranquilizer backwards, and shot yourself with some Jaro tranquilizer. Lesson learned, never, under any circumstances lend a gun of any type to Spyro. Not even a Nerf gun.

SPYRO: Oh. {Stand up on the floor} So, how long was I knocked out?

DRAKE: About 166 hours.

SPYRO: Oh. {Long Pause} Wait a second…that’s almost 7 days. Didn’t I tell you to remind me of that email that gave a deadline of 7 days?

DRAKE: Dude, you were sleeping.

SPYRO: {Getting Agitated} You could of woken me up!

DRAKE: Not a chance. We tried just about everything.

{Cuts to a flashback showing Spyro out cold on the floor. Drake is standing over him with an air horn, and cotton in his ears. He sounds it for 5 seconds, then the window shatters from the vibration. Cut to Drakes second try where he’s playing an electric guitar hooked up to an amplifier. Spyro continues to remain sleeping.}

DRAKE: {Finishes his solo} That was Freebird. What’s that? Encore? Ok.

{Cuts to Drakes third try showing Drake tickling Spyro with a bunch of feathers in his hand.}

DRAKE: Tickle, Tickle, Tickle! Aren’t you ticklish?

{An angry honking goose, missing a third of its feathers, runs on-screen and chasses Drake Off-screen. Cuts back to normal time.}

DRAKE: So everything was useless.

SPYRO: O Der {Pronouces it “Oder”}

DRAKE: Huh? I’m wearing deodorant!

SPYRO: {Cutting off} That’s not the point. I only have 2 hours to…wait, what did that email say again?

{Cuts to the Dragorange screen. Spyro head comes on-screen and opens the following email:}

Subject:Death

Dear Spyro.
I Have Emailed You To Inform You Your Time Has Come.
You Only Have A Week To Live.
When That Time Comes I'll Be Ready.
To Prevent Your Death, You Have To Do One Good Deed Involving The Poopsmith.
-Yours Sinceriously, The Grim Reaper.

SPYRO: Oh noes! 2 hours left! I got to do a good deed involving the Poopsmith!

DRAKE: Poopsmith? Is he a plumber or something?

SPYRO: I think he’s the guy who shovels the pile of crap at the mayors house. Plumbing isn’t accessible at the mansions area.

DRAKE: I see. I’ll stay out of this. Sounds gross.

SPYRO: Ok. {Short pause} And I’m off! {He jumps out the window, his voice fades away} Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh

{Cuts to Stinkomans houses entrance. Spyro is face down flat on the ground.}

SPYRO: {Lifts his head up.} Ow.

VOICE: {Deep voice} That’s why you’re loosing most of your precious life.

SPYRO: Who said that?

VOICE: Up here. {Spyro looks left} Not that way. {Spyro looks right} Up here you bean.

{Scrolls up showing the Grim Reaper (Death) standing sideways on Stinkomans house}

DEATH: It’s me.

SPYRO: Oh. It’s you. Look, I don’t know why you want my soul. It’s not my time yet.

DEATH: Why? Because you cheated gravity, thus cheating death.

SPYRO: Oh. I was wondering why that never kills me. But how did I cheat gravity?

DEATH: Well, you stole his test scores, and replaced them with yours, thus causing a way to survive falling impact. Luckily, after you harassed many times, he told his mom, and his mom told me. And now I have come for you…

SPYRO: I still have 2 hours to redeem myself, right?

DEATH: …Right, but I just want to warn and intimidate you. It’s fun.

SPYRO: Oh… {realizing} Hey…you’re trying to waste my time! {Get’s up} I’m not falling for it! {Runs off-screen}

{Cuts to a train station. Spyro runs on-screen to the ticket booth. Then he runs onto the train. Cuts to Spyro running into the train, and into the conductors (Peachy) room.}

SPYRO: Yo, Peachy!

PEACHY: Huh? Haven’t seen you in a while.

SPYRO: No time to waste! I need to get to the Mayors mansion in less than two hours!

PEACHY: Two hours? I don’t think I can get there in time.

SPYRO: What! My whole life is at stake! Don’t you have any emergency buttons that puts you into hyperspeed?

PEACHY: Well, I’ll check. {Examines the control panel} Uh…actually, there is. It says In Case of Not Enough Time, Press Here.

SPYRO: Ok! Push it!

{Peachy Pushes the button. Rocket blasts occur, and the train speeds up to an extreme speed immediately.}

PEACHY: {Off-screen screaming} Waaaaaauuuuuuug!

SPYRO: {Off-screen} Ah, shut up. It’s not that bad.

{Cuts to a black screen saying: “1.75 hours later”. Then shows the Mayor Mansion/KoT’s Castle.}

SPYRO: {Off-screen} Hey look! There’s the Mayors Mansion! Hit the brakes!

PEACHY: {Off-screen} You know, we’re going to crash. But if you insist.

{Train Brakes are heard, along with a continuous screech. The Train darts across the screen and continues to go. The screeching eventually stops indicating that the train is not in motion.}

SPYRO: {Off-screen} And now to go do that good deed!

{Racing music starts, and continues to play for 20 seconds. Spyro eventually runs on-screen and goes across the tongue bridge. Cuts to a zoomed in shot of Spyro at the door. He knocks twice, and the Mayor/Kot opens the door.}

MAYOR: Oooh! Thanks chef for the pizz- {realizes} Oh. Your not that little chef guy.

SPYRO: No. Where’s is the Poopsmith?

MAYOR: He’s out back shoveling that whatzit.

SPYRO: Thanks. {Runs off-screen}

MAYOR: {Short Pause} No one ever wants to see me.

{Cuts to the Poopsmith shoveling one pile of whatzit into another smaller pile.}

SPYRO: {Running on-screen} Poopsmith! {The Poopsmith looks at him. Short pause} I have to do a good deed for you. So, um…is there…anything I can assist you with? {The Poopsmith holds out his shovel to him. Pause, then speaks reluctantly} Oh……er…um…o…k? {He takes the shovel disgustedly, and starts shoveling the big pile of whatzit into the little pile.}

{Cuts to a black screen saying: “10 minutes later”. Then cuts back showing Spyro all done with the whatzit placement swapping.}

SPYRO: Ok…I saved you work for the day. So I’ll be going now. {walks off-screen}

{Cuts to Spyro and Drake sitting on the couch at Stinkomans house.}

DRAKE: So, I see you’re not a ghost or a zombie or a soul. I assume you did the deed.

SPYRO: Yes. And now I’m scarred for life.

DRAKE: Well, I told you it was going to be disgusting.

SPYRO: Dude! I was the one who had to do the good deed. I didn’t have a choice.

DRAKE: You could have baked a cake or something.

SPYRO: Nope. Too much time wasted.

DRAKE: Oh. Well, did you learn any lesson or something?

SPYRO: The only thing I learned is that gravity is cheesed off at me.

DEATH: {Off-screen} Well done Spyro. You learned your lesson.

SPYRO: Shut up death.

DRAKE: You know what else you should've learned?

SPYRO: {Asking} What?

DRAKE: Learn to hold a tranquilizer right.

{Fades to black. The Paper comes down saying: “What is Drake Talking About? Tune in Next Time! Also click here to email Spyro”}

Fun Facts

• The reason part 3 came before part 2 is because this email was emailed before the next threat email.
  • It's also intended for a creative twist.
• The Drive Thru Whale saying thank you for your patronage is because he took Stinkomans severed leg, refering to Drive Thru
• IMA FIRING MAH LAZOR is meme on the internet. (link not provided because of Kidlets)
• The last scene before Spyro woke up was a reference to a YouTube video/meme, Over 9000!!!
• Peachy hasn't been seen since Hotel (excluding being at the poker table in Skydiving)
• Free bird is one of the longest rock songs, Spanning about 10 minutes.
• Spyro had a running gag where he survived falls from ridiculous heights, and gets up without a scratch.
  • Gravity made an appearance in Skydiving, and was mocked by Spyro.
• O Der is an exclamation created by Shadow Scythe.
• Previously, pronounced prev-eye-ously, a reference to a 3 parter Space Tree episode.

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