(even if you aren't vegan)
Ethan & Dolan/Badstar
Summary
Badstar gets interviewed
Transcript
ETHAN: -And I was all like, "No way, sister. Believe it or not, but I gots morales!"
DOLAN: Eh... the camera's on.
ETHAN: Oh... It's... It's time for an interview!
DOLAN: Please welcome, Badstar!
BADSTAR: {Walks in} Thanks! Nice to be here, grey boring guy and orange awesome guy!
ETHAN: Heh. He knows how to play to my likings. What's up, Badstar?
BADSTAR: Eh, not much. Well, I have been in my first trial... but other then that, not much.
ETHAN: You're a lawyer?
BADSTAR: Well, yeah. I'm a rookie defense attorney. I've only been in one trial though.
ETHAN: Are... are you any good?
DOLAN: Why? What happened?
ETHAN: Let him answer the question...
BADSTAR: Well, I'm decent... I wouldn't say I'm an expert.
ETHAN: How good are you in... theft charges?
BADSTAR: I haven't been in a theft case.
ETHAN: But... could you?
DOLAN: Ethan, what's this all about?
ETHAN: Sssh!
BADSTAR: Wait... are you saying you want me to be your lawyer?
ETHAN: ...Maybe...
DOLAN: Let's move on-
ETHAN: What was your previous case about?
BADSTAR: A gameboy was destroyed. My client was framed. It turned out to be my brother, Homestrong.
ETHAN: Now, what if there was a.... gold watch "destroyed" and I was "framed" for stealing it?
BADSTAR: ...You destroyed a watch didn't you?
ETHAN: Depends... Does it really count if they guy didn't even have any arms to wear it?
DOLAN: Ethan....
BADSTAR: Can we just continue the interview?
ETHAN: But just say that-
DOLAN: Ethan! Let's just drop this... Now Badstar, what else have you been into recently?
BADSTAR: Nothing much.
DOLAN: Really? Not any new fanstuffs or anything?
BADSTAR: Well, there IS an interactive game.
DOLAN: Care to elaborate?
BADSTAR: It's about my lawyer career as I solve puzzling cases!
ETHAN: So you're more advanced in law then you say you are?
BADSTAR: No. Like I said, I've only been in one case.
ETHAN: So say that someone broke a "watch" and then-
DOLAN: He said no, Ethan! Ugh... anything else interesting going on with you Badstar? Maybe something in the future?
BADSTAR: No, nothing interesting in the future.
{A large "Ahem" is heard from the audience}
BADSTAR: Oh yeah. Apparently I have a son from the future.
DOLAN: Really? What's that about?
BADSTAR: Well apparently in the future I marry a woman who is half cat and have a son named Gilligan.
DOLAN: And he's here?
BADSTAR: Yep. He likes to go to the past sometimes.
DOLAN: Can we maybe talk with him?
BADSTAR: Nah, I don't think s- {A grenade is fired at Badstar. He jumps out of the way before it explodes} OKAY, FINE!!!
GILLIGAN: {Flies on set holding his grenade gun}
ETHAN: Holy crap! You can fly?
GILLIGAN: Yep. I fly using my tail.
DOLAN: How is that scientifically possible?
ETHAN: Quiet! Can't you see this man can fly?
DOLAN: Yeah, but... how?
GILLIGAN: {Points grenade gun at Dolan} DO NOT QUESTION ME
DOLAN: Okay okay! I quess it just works...
ETHAN: Badstar, how exactly did your son get all twisted like this?
BADSTAR: He got it from his best friend, Tracy.
ETHAN: Whoa... deja vu.
DOLAN: But seriously though, there's nothing new in the works for you Badstar?
BADSTAR: Nope.
ETHAN: You're not even gonna get creative on this one are you?
BADSTAR: Nope.
ETHAN: So... are we pretty much done with this interview then?
BADSTAR: I guess. But first... Ethan, did you really break that watch? Cause if you did, I'm not defending you.
ETHAN: Well.... what if the guy never actually could wear the thing?
BADSTAR: Then whats the point of him even getting a watch!?
DOLAN: MAYBE it was a family heirloom. MAYBE it's been passed down from all my ancestors throughout the ages...
ETHAN: But you're a robot....
DOLAN: You're buying me a new watch....
ETHAN: Badstar, do I havta?
BADSTAR: Yep. Can I go home now? My Golden Girls DVD is still running! I MEAN MY... manly man show of manliness DVD...
ETHAN: The Manly Man Show of Manliness? I need to get a copy of that!
DOLAN: Well, I guess you better be getting on your way now. Anything you'd like to say before we kick you out of our basement?
BADSTAR: Yes! To my brother, Homestrong... I hate you and hope you rot in jail.
ETHAN: You gotta love family love.
DOLAN: Well it's been nice interviewing you, Badstar. Now if you'd excuse me, I'm off to sue a certain someone for a certain theft... G'night.
{end}
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