Conshow/14

Summary

I lied! The show gets some technical difficulties and the writer takes a day off. The cast try to make do without him

Transcript

{Open to the writer's desk, the computer from episode 13 is slightly charred and shoddily put back together}

WRITER: This computer better work this time!

{The writer switches on the computer, it makes three clicking noises in an interval before exploding}

WRITER: That's it. I'm taking the day off.

{Intro Sequence}

{Cut to Conchris' House - Basement, Conchris holds up a watch}

CONCHRIS: I invented a slow-mo watch!

{Cruroar peeks in}

CRUROAR: Oh no! Chrionroar is after it again!

{Chrionroar flops in with a fish on his head}

CHRIONROAR: I AM THE FISH QUEEN!

{Alarms start sounding, the screen flashes red}

CRUROAR: What is that?

CONCHRIS: What is what?

CRUROAR: That sound of course!

CONCHRIS: Oh, that's the sound of the writer taking a day off, leaving us with no plot and character development to go on.

CRUROAR: Wait, WHAT?!

CONCHRIS: Yeah, this entire show is run by one man. It's written, cast by and even animated by that one guy!

CRUROAR: What about the special effects?

CONCHRIS: Oh, they're real.

CRUROAR: So now what?

{The alarms stop sounding}

CONCHRIS: Let's all go upstairs and have a party! That's never been done before in any series ever!

CIEEIA: I think that's...

CONCHRIS: EVER!

{Cut to Conchris' House - Living Room, everyone (Conchris, Cruroar, Forest, Cieeia and Chrionroar) burst through the basement with several dead rats, the rats disappear when they all sit down}

CONCHRIS: Okay, after an hour or so grinding down there, anyone have any stories to share with us?

FOREST: I have one. It is a story where everyone dies, even you. {points at the screen}

CONCHRIS: Nah, that's a stupid story, anyone else?

CIEEIA: How about we make up our own plot for this episode?

CONCHRIS: Your mum's a plot!

CIEEIA: Hey!

CRUROAR: Don't say that. Also, where are we going to find a plot when the writer is off?

CONCHRIS: How about we go find the guy that makes the plots?

CIEEIA: The writer is off!

CONCHRIS: Oh yeah, I forgot that.

CHRIONROAR: HOWS ABOUT SUPER HAPPY FUN LAND PLOTZ?!

CONCHRIS: Never.

CRUROAR: How about an original plot?

CONCHRIS: There's too many of them that had been done!

CRUROAR: Okay... how about a giant metal robot attacks the city?

{Cut to the outside of Wikity, a giant robot crash lands on the city hall and starts firing lasers at random places}

GIANT ROBOT: DESTROY!

{Cut to a time card that reads "Five hours of epic filler later"}

{Cut to the Streets, Cruroar and Cieeia are severely injured, Chrionroar has no limbs left and Conchris is the only one not injured}

CONCHRIS: That plot worked out all right after all!

CRUROAR: No it didn't! We got badly hurt! How much will this cost in our hospital bill?

CHRIONROAR: I ARE TORSO MAN!

CONCHRIS: We seriously need the writer back.

{Cut to the writer's desk, the writer walks in}

WRITER: Okay, I'm... {notices the monitor flashing "Wikity is in trouble!"} WHAT?! What the... how did that happen?

{Pause}

WRITER: Screw this.

{Cut to the streets, the writer (as a glowing ball) appears amidst Sirhcnoc's army of creatures}

SIRHCNOC: GET THEM!

{The creatures start to attack, Conchris pulls out his laser blade and starts whacking them away. Cruroar charges up his Solar Gun and blasts some of them away. Cieeia starts fending off the creatures with the pipe. Forest uses a laser to keep the others at bay whilst Chrionroar watches by the sidelines}

SIRHCNOC: Damn! My awesome army is no match without a real plot!

WRITER: Ahem!

SIRHCNOC: What? You're back?

{Everyone stops what they're doing}

CONCHRIS: He's back?

CRUROAR: Back in Black?

CIEEIA: What now?

FOREST: I was enjoying the killing of many innocent creatures!

CHRIONROAR: MY NAME IS STRAWBERRY!

WRITER: Yes, this city has quite enough insanity for one episode so... EMERGENCY PLOT CHANGE!

{Cut to Conchris' House - Living Room, Conchris is holding up the watch from the beginning}

CONCHRIS: I am so glad that I managed to retrieve this watch from Chrionroar! To be honest, being in the Matrix is kind of annoying after a while.

{A man suddenly comes up behind him}

MAN: Will you take the blue pill?

CONCHRIS: Go to hell. {throws the watch at the man in slow motion, he makes a poor attempt to dodge but gets hit anyway}

{Credit sequence}

{Cut to a black screen with the word "END" on it}