Conshow/16

Summary

Conchris goes on a holiday of sorts. Chrionroar drags Forest with him to go on a crazy referential adventure-type adventure!

Transcript

{Open to Conchris' House - Main Hall, Cruroar and Cieeia are busy conversing}

CRUROAR: I noticed the sudden spike in Wiki User Shows lately.

CIEEIA: Yeah, I noticed too.

CRUROAR: I bet you at least one of them won't get up off the ground.

CIEEIA: You're on!

{Conchris jumps in with a giant laser between the two}

CONCHRIS: I'MA FIRING MAH LASER! BAHH! {fires the laser, hitting Cruroar and Cieeia}

{Cue introduction}

{Open to the airport with Conchris, Cruroar and Cieeia}

CRUROAR: So, how long will you be away?

CONCHRIS: An undisclosed period of time. I think, about this entire episode?

CIEEIA: Yeah, yeah. We'll see you off. {whipsers to Cruroar} Let's run for it. See ya! {runs off with Cruroar in tow}

CONCHRIS: Something tells me this will break a rule if it was presented in another dimension... Oh well, it's probably nothing.

{Cut to Conchris' House - Main Hall, Chrionroar is roasting a tree over a fire, Cruroar and Cieeia run in}

CRUROAR: We're ba- What are you doing?

CHRIONROAR: I are making sacrifice to sacrifice tree man dog god!

CIEEIA: Is it just me, or do you make less and less sense each episode?

CRUROAR: Asking that will cause the universe to implode. Also, Conches is gone for an undisclosed period of time, so...

CIEEIA: You know what I'm thinking?

CRUROAR & CIEEIA: HOUSE PARTY!

CRUROAR: We could invite the entire cast to our house and party for ages!

CIEEIA: That's the best idea ever! But... we need something...

CRUROAR: Oh, the Disco Ball of Golden Discoeyness, which is hidden in the mountains of Memevillage.

CIEEIA: Seriously?

CRUROAR: Yeah, we need two idiots to go out and get it back for the party to officially begin... Hmm...

{Chrionroar suddenly stands to attention, grabs Forest and flies off}

CRUROAR: That was easy. Now help me get this tree out of the house.

{Cut to the roads to Memevillage, Chrionroar is dragging Forest in a wagon full of pancakes}

FOREST: Why the hell are you dragging ME along?

CHRIONROAR: It are good for character devleopments {sic}.

FOREST: Somebody please shoot me...

{Cut to Afarawayplacethatisnotwikitysohaha}

CONCHRIS: This is certainly not Wikity at all! {A mosquito flies close to Conchris but he crushes it between his two hands, he looks at his left hand in disgust} Eugh, I got bug on my hand! In the buginator it goes...

{Conchris slides his hands across the top of a metal box, it starts churning and it produces a robot mosquito}

CONCHRIS: Go and pester blue hedgehogs for me, will ya?

MOSQUITO BOT: Yes, sir. {flies off}

CONCHRIS: This is much better than trying to instill zaniness into the show.

{Cruroar suddenly pops in}

CRUROAR: I thought I was the one who was supposed to do that?

CONCHRIS: How'd you get here?

{Pause}

CRUROAR: Plot hole?

CONCHRIS: Then go plot hole back to the house. {throws a plot hole at Cruroar, making him disappear} The nerve of him.

{Cut to Memevillage, Chrionroar walks in with Forest in tow}

FOREST: Look, if you could just let me go from this nightmare, I will not kill you this episode.

CHRIONROAR: NOES!

{Forest jumps up and prepares to blast Chrionroar until an eekdancer bursts in}

EEKDANCER: What's going on here?

FOREST: Nothing, officer.

EEKDANCER: Oh, then... Carry on... I guess.

{The eekdancer slowly walks (dances?) away and Forest blasts Chrionroar, sending him through five different houses until he hits the top of the cave entrance, Forest walks up to Chrionroar and is surprised that he got up}

CHRIONROAR: That was funz! Does it again!

FOREST: Why the hell can you survive things that any ordinary man can't? Oh wait, it's because your brain is completely empty.

CHRIONROAR: I HAS TEH SOLUTION! {pulls the top of his head off and puts a rock inside, he then puts it back on}

FOREST: Great, now you have a brain the size of a small rock. It's better than air I guess.

{Chrionroar suddenly flies up to the top of the cave's ceiling}

FOREST: Urgh... I hate the writer for torturing me with this.

{Cut to Conchris' House - Main Hall, Cruroar is on the phone to Conchris with Cieeia running about in the background}

CRUROAR: What? Oh, uh... nothing's wrong here.

CONCHRIS: {phone} Great, because you know what happens to people who fail me, right?

CRUROAR: No of course not...

{Cieeia runs away from a giant bird}

CIEEIA: ONE OF THE EEGS JUST HATCHED! HELP!

CRUROAR: In a minute. So, what do you mean?

CONCHRIS: {phone} I murder them in their sleep.

CRUROAR: Yeah, great. Bye. {hangs up and zaps the bird with the solar gun} There, it's knocked out.

CIEEIA: Phew! Thanks. When are those two going to get back anyway?

CRUROAR: I don't know, probably like a decade or something.

{Cut to the inside of Memevillage cave, Chrionroar is running about stabbing things in a birds-eye view with Forest following, he plants a bomb on a wall and it explodes, inside the room is an old man}

OLD MAN: DODONGO HATE SMOKE.

FOREST: What the hell kind of tip is that? That's the most idiotic tip that I have ever heard in my life. I will be sure to annihilate you when the chance arises. {blasts the Old Man, making him angry, he starts breathing fire}

CHRIONROAR: FIREBALLS? YUM! {eats the fire somehow and breathes it back at the Old Man, killing him and revealing a secret passageway, a Zelda secret jingle plays}

FOREST: What is this? Some kind of referential adventure-type adventure?

{Chrionroar drags Forest into the secret passageway, it opens up to a big room with a disco ball on the top of it}

FOREST: Finally, our epic quest has ended. Let's go.

CHRIONROAR: MUST LICK IT! {jumps up to the disco ball and starts licking it, a guy in a disco suit comes out and kicks Chrionroar off}

DISCO GUY: Who are you intruding in my lair of pure disconess?

FOREST: These characters just get even worse, do they?

DISCO GUY: I don't know who you are, baby. But I'm the discomaniac, CHAMON!

{The disco guy starts moonwalking whilst Chrionroar jumps back onto the disco ball to lick it}

DISCO GUY: So, you're here for my awesome disco ball, eh? Well, you can't have it!

FOREST: Why not? You're going to die anyway?

DISCO GUY: What?

{Forest blasts the Disco Guy with a giant laser}

DISCO GUY: No! Dying by disintergration! Must. Dance. For. Last. Time. {starts dancing} Ooh yeah! {disintergrates}

{Words appear on the screen which read "CONGRATURATION! YOU HAVE COMPLETED A GREAT GAME. NOW GO REST OUR HEROES!!!"}

FOREST: What the {bleep}? What is this garglemesh?

CHRIONROAR: A WINRAR IS ME! {grabs the disco ball and flies off with Forest somehow, a boulder rolls onto the scene}

BOULDER: Nobody likes me...

{Cut to Conchris' House - Main Hall, Chrionroar bursts in with the disco ball and Forest}

CRUROAR: We really need to fix that ceiling.

FOREST: We have finished your stupid errand, now can I rest?

CRUROAR: No! Because the party has just started!

{Cut to a time card reading "Ten hours later"}

{Cut back to Conchris' House - Main Hall, Conchris walks in}

CONCHRIS: Hello? I'm back from my awesome adventuREEEEE?!

{Conchris looks around to see that the house is in a state of mess}

CONCHRIS: What happened here? Cruroar?

{Pan down to reveal Cruroar sleeping on the floor}

CRUROAR: Golden... Sun... {wakes up} Huh, what? {gets up} Hey, uh... Conches... I see you're... {Conchris pulls out his laser blade with red eyes} What are you going to do with that?

CONCHRIS: DIE!

CRUROAR: Yipe!

{Cruroar runs off with Conchris in pursuit, they chase each other across the house until Cruroar hits a wall. Conchris raises his laser blade to hit him and before collision, the credits begin to roll}

{After the credits has ended, cut to a black screen with the word "END" on it}

CRUROAR: {voice} ARRGH! THE PAIN OF FAILURE IS BURNING ME UP SO BADLY!

{Disco Guy suddenly teleports in still dancing}

DISCO GUY: Wha? Oh. I didn't know about anything about being in the end screen... Uh... Peace! {falls over}