Conshow/13

Summary

This is Episode 13, this is the part where everyone's luck is the worst ever!

Transcript

{Open to the Writer's office, the writer is on the computer, typing}

WRITER: Reading those other Wiki User shows and watching those webtoons scattered around on the internets has given my creative juices a bit of a jolt! Woo!

{The computer suddenly catches fire}

WRITER: OH CRAP!

{Intro sequence}

{Cut to Sirhcnoc's Lair on a Hill, Sirhcnoc is currently locked in a cage, Greg walks in}

GREG: Sir! I've never appeared before on Season 2! Can I have my lines now?

SIRHCNOC: Er... yes.

{Greg starts jumping for joy but stops when he notices that Sirhcnoc is locked in a cage}

GREG: Why are you in that cage, IN YOUR OWN LAIR?!

SIRHCNOC: It's Friday the 13th!

GREG: Dude! You've never changed the month or year on that calendar! And that's because you like the woman on it!

SIRHCNOC: So? It's still Friday the 13th!

GREG: {sigh} Go get hit by a train.

{A train bursts in}

TRAIN: THAT CAN BE ARRANGED, {bleep}!

{The train crushes Sirhcnoc and Greg, it then flies off-screen}

SIRHCNOC: Ow...

{Cut to the streets, Conchris is walking along with Cruroar and Cieeia}

CONCHRIS: So, this is the 13th episode. The writer's having some pretty bad luck with his computer.

CRUROAR: Does that mean we can break the fourth wall without repercussions?

{Conchris thinks for a second}

CONCHRIS: No.

CRUROAR: WHAT?!

CONCHRIS: The fourth wall wasn't meant for breaking, BUT NO! You guys keep breaking it!

CIEEIA: What about that episode where you thought you were Psycho Mantis?

CONCHRIS: Ha ha! Yeah, I remember that episode. That episode sucked, LIKE THE REST OF THEM!

CRUROAR: To be honest, Season 2 is going along pretty well.

CONCHRIS: Yeah, it's because all the characters are on even ground now development-wise and that the writer is focusing on slowly developing characters.

CIEEIA: But didn't his...

CONCHRIS: NOBODY ASKED YOU!

{Cieeia is on the verge of tears until Chrionroar pops up and pulls out a clover with a million leaves on it}

CHRIONROAR: LOOKS AT WHAT I FOUNDZ!

{Conchris and Cruroar stare at the clover for a bit}

CRUROAR: Uh, yeah. It has a million leaves on it. What's so special about it?

CONCHRIS: I've heard of 5-leaf clovers but not 1,000,000-leaf clovers.

CRUROAR: Do we even use the comma for numbers anymore?

CIEEIA: Last time I checked, no.

CHRIONROAR: I ARE GONNA KEEP IT IN MAH BAGZ!

CRUROAR: You don't even have one... unless you keep your items in Hammerspace.

{Cut to another dimension, several strange looking creatures of varying shapes look at each other}

CREATURE #1: He's onto us! RUN!

{All the creatures scatter, cut back to the streets}

CHRIONROAR: I HAS A HAMMARSPACE?!

CRUROAR: Yeah sure.

CONCHRIS: Uh, dudes? You're derailing the plot here.

CRUROAR: It's not like {the 1,000,000 leaf clover starts glowing} there is a real plot to this episode to begin wi-

{A car runs over Cruroar}

ITALIAN GUY: Sorry, me foot slipped. {reverses off-screen}

CRUROAR: -th... Ow...

CONCHRIS: Don't worry! You'll come back next episode!

CIEEIA: Death isn't permanent?

CONCHRIS: Nope, unless the writer says it is.

CIEEIA: Why do I get the feeling that there will be more religious jokes?

CONCHRIS: No, that's the wind, let's get going to... Place...

{Cut to a building called "Place", it is actually a grocery store, Conchris, Cieeia and Chrionroar walk inside to find Clark b/w Greg}

CONCHRIS: CLARK!

CLARK: Conchris.

{The two stare angrily at each other before they both start shaking hands}

CONCHRIS: Nice to meet you this season.

CLARK: Same here.

CIEEIA: Pity Cruroar isn't here.

CHRIONROAR: THATZ WHAT THEY {the 1,000,000-leaf clover glows again} WNATZ YOU 2 THANKZ!

{Several vegetables fly from the baskets and they start attacking Cieeia, she tries to dodge the oncoming vegetables with little success}

CIEEIA: URGH! Look at me! I'm all covered with vegetables!

CONCHRIS: Kids, this is why vegetables are bad for you. Eat fruit instead!

{The 1,000,000-leaf clover glows again and Conchris (also Clark) are pelted with fruit}

CONCHRIS: ARGH! STRAWBERRIES! URGH! BLUEBERRIES! Uhh... Tomatoes? What the hell?

CLARK: Generic grunting noise!

CONCHRIS: Okay, what IS causing all this havoc?

{Everyone (Conchris, Clark, Greg and Cieeia) all glares at Chrionroar}

CHRIONROAR: WHAT DID I DOES?!

CONCHRIS: That clover. Let me see it.

{Chrionroar grudgingly hands Conchris the clover, who inspects it}

CONCHRIS: It's just as I expected...

CIEEIA: What?

CONCHRIS: This clover is cursed!

{Everyone gasps}

CIEEIA: Cursed?

CONCHRIS: Whenever someone mentions a keyword, they become cursed to be hit by it.

CIEEIA: That doesn't explain why Cruroar got hit by {the clover starts glowing} a ca-

{A car suddenly bursts in and crushes Cieeia and Greg}

CIEEIA: -r... See you... next episode...

GREG: MY SPLEEN!

CONCHRIS: Great. {glares at Chrionroar} Great job! You've just killed off two of the main characters this episode! I hope you're happy!

CHRIONROAR: YESH! MAH LAZERS ARE WORKS! {The clover glows and Wikity is hit by a giant laser, cut to a white space, Conchris pops in with Cruroar, Cieeia, Greg, Clark and Chrionroar}

CRUROAR: There's the guy that cursed us! GET HIM!

{Conchris, Cruroar, Cieeia, Greg and Clark chase after Chrionroar, who is happily skipping along at a high speed}

CONCHRIS: How could he skip so fast?

{Credit sequence}

{Cut to the charred remains of Conchris' house, Forest walks on-screen}

FOREST: Hello? I'm back from my belittling classes. Anyone there? {Forest looks around to see nobody} I guess they moved, to Mars. Because they couldn't handle how much of a failure they all are.

{The screen slowly fades in}

FOREST: Don't you fade on me!

{Cut to a black screen with the word "END" on it}

CONCHRIS: {voice} At least we'll come back next episnowed.

CRUROAR: [voice} Urgh, what a horrid pun.