(even if you aren't vegan)
RiffText/BQ
NOXIGAR: Wait, why are you riffing this again?
NAMINE: You have a special rule. For things you like that are in dire need of riffing and being torn apart, I am the one to riff them. Typically I'll do 'em by myself, but you sometimes join in for at least a couple episodes.
NAMINE: I don't have the same biases you do. We agreed upon this so that we could be less merciful to JCMovies and Aruseus Emails. You found them great, and I didn't. In relation, Bell Quest won't be any different.
NOXIGAR: But people riffing Bell Quest was what caused me to riff their riffs to even begin with.
NAMINE: You hated their riffs because they were hypocritical, and they specifically targeted Keith in future riffs. You have a bias in favour of Keith's works because you fell in love with him.
{Short pause.}
NAMINE: You told me Mystery Fanstuff Theatre 3000 won this award, too. Right?
NOXIGAR: Right.
NAMINE: Question: when does something stop sucking?
NAMINE: MFT3K is bad, and it still won. Did people know quality back in 2008? I mean, I know you did. You were one of the oldest on the site, and were of the age threshold to know what quality was and wasn't. In fact, I distinctly remember you used to hate a webcomic. When that part of you showed it to yourself after a first impression, you remembered begrudgingly liking it over time, as you developed a proper reading comprehension.
NOXIGAR: That's right. I remember not liking Megatokyo, then growing to like it when it stopped sucking.
Welcome to Bell Quest. No, it ain't a interactive game.
NAMINE: 2008, right? I could've sworn interactives were trendy. But, not being trendy does not necessarily make something good.
It's just a fanfic by belstrnnmmvnmn & Badstar
NAMINE: Two lads writing collaboratively. It reminds me of Wikihood, or at least the incarnations primarily done by Lex and Chaos.
NAMINE: Flashy.
Chappies
- Chapter 1: Idiots To The Rescue
- Chapter 2: On The Road
- Chapter 3: Anti-Bling Attacks!
- Chapter 4: Alone
- Chapter 5: The Shortest Chapter Ever! Enter Demon Bell! or Bellson saves the day?
NAMINE: If I learned anything from Aruseus Emails, short chapters are not good.
NAMINE: If I learned anything from JCMovies, long chapters are also not good.
NAMINE: Filler chapters. Quaint.
NAMINE: I recognize "Battel" as a legitimate spelling, and do not feel the compulsion to correct you on this constantly.
DVD Version
- All of Bell Quest. Except the outside of movie parts.
- Outtakes
- Deleted Scenes
- Commentary
NAMINE: Seeing as there's only one Commentary, I edited the page to save time on riffing Bell Quest's Commentary.
Closing Comments
{Namine arrives from the theatre, and approaches Noxigar until she's a few feet away from him. Then, she stops. The action also stops.}
NAMINE: Hey, Noxigar.
NOXIGAR: Yeah?
NAMINE: Why did you like Bell Quest after 2007?
NOXIGAR: For a while, it was just the best thing on the Wiki User Wiki. Not many things could compete with it.
NAMINE: Even your works couldn't?
NOXIGAR: At least one of our episodes was a crossover with Bell Quest.
{Namine nods.}
NAMINE: Makes sense, I guess? You know it isn't as good as you keep saying it is, right?
{Noxigar says nothing. He looks away.}
NAMINE: The grammar was neglected. Too many characters kept popping up, when there should have been a set cap at around roughly fifteen. Given the fact it was originally a Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki fan fiction, it should have featured more Homestar Runner or at least been overhauled until it met standards appropriate to the Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki. Even if Its Dot Com was a complete twat and Homsar44withpie was an excessive stickler for the rules, you have to consider that Bell Quest should have been remade for the Wiki User Wiki when it was freed from its obligations on the previous site. Even though the main plot is comprehensible, there were a lot of sideplots which quickly took over at accelerating velocities. Even with this in mind, at least two episodes were spent entirely on filler, just to round off at 10 Chapters. If Bell Quest took itself with any iota of seriousness, it would not be a good fanfiction in the slightest.
{Noxigar sighs. He otherwise remains silent.}
NAMINE: It's definitely not as bad as Mystery Fanstuff Theatre 3000 made it out to be. Quite a few references kept going over my head, but that also happens in MFT3K, and it happens in Lex's works as well. Hell, the same could be said of your works in relation to how others see them.
{Noxigar raises a brow.}
NAMINE: Yeah, I know. Bell Quest isn't entirely bad. In fact, you're right about a few things. It had potential to grow as a story. Had it gone through a professional editor, it might see its potential more up close. It's definitely still comprehensible, in spite of the grammatical mistakes and constant sideplots. The splinter universes somehow keep everything stable. The usage of "Pure Watashi" as a term actually was kind of clever. The characters from other stories were in-character, and the original characters were somewhat likable, with a few minor exceptions (Vegerot).
{Noxigar blinks.}
NAMINE: The sole reason I riffed Bell Quest was to teach you a lesson: the same lesson you wanted to teach The Chooms long, long ago. If you're going to proclaim high standards for writing, you better step up to the plate and recognize even the faults of the writings belonging to those you love.
NOXIGAR: Thanks.
NAMINE: No sweat. Just don't let things get to your head.
{The scene changes to Noxigar and Namine just talking, at the outside of the RiffText theatre.}
NAMINE: {voice-over} I think I can sum this up quick: basically, Bell Quest was just as faulty as other things Noxigar liked from roughly the same era within the Wiki User Wiki's lifespan, such as JCMovies and Aruseus Emails. Putting Bell Quest on a pedestal was probably not a good idea for any healthy reason.
{Short pause.}
NAMINE: {v-o} Nonetheless, I wanted to use Bell Quest as a warm-up for taking on works Noxigar participated in. He mentioned Wikihood a bunch, and I wouldn't mind riffing that eventually. Not the old Wikihood Redux stuff, I'm pretty sure Lex and Chaos have that covered. Nox himself might have that covered, too. No, I'm talking about the part that I wasn't a part of. The newest installment, as of 2015.
{Short pause.}
NAMINE: {v-o} It's just dawned on me Wikihood's been cancelled in its entirety. I don't know what happened, but it's probably best if it's left as an abridgment. It'll turn into a pointless Skype argument between Nox and the others again, otherwise.
{End RiffText/BQ}
