RiffText/Mystery Fanstuff Theater 3000/Zarel Emails

Opening Comments

CHWOKA: So, Zarel Emails, huh?

NACHOMAN: Yup.

CHWOKA: Say, Skub, isn't Zarel your new best friend?

SKUB: I'LL SHOW YOU I'LL BE MORE VICIOUS THAN EVER

CHWOKA: Really? Hit me with a joke.

SKUB: Uhhhhhh GIVE ME A SECOND

CHWOKA: What, are we going to make a furry joke or something? Maybe correct his grammar? What brand new exciting riffs will you hit us with in our SECOND SEASON?

SKUB: NO I REFUSE TO BE STEREOTYPED

CHWOKA: I'll stereotype you! I'll stereotype you as worthless.

{Skub cries into his hands.}

CHWOKA: So, NachoMan, first episode. Excited?

NACHOMAN: What about Skub?

CHWOKA: Don't change the subject, we're talking about your first day.

NACHOMAN: No, I think you really hurt his feelings...

CHWOKA: He doesn't have feelings.

NACHOMAN: Oh, well, I guess this is cool and stuff. It's always been my dream to get paid to make fun of people, agle-

CHWOKA: You don't get paid for this

NACHOMAN: I-- excuse me?

CHWOKA: We're just doing this for fun!

NACHOMAN: I, I just felt a serious dip in my motivation.

CHWOKA: Wait, where's Bluebry?

DINOSHAUR: Well hello fellas, what are we doing today?

CHWOKA: You know what? Just start the show, I'm sure he'll show up eventually.

{Fade out.}

Zarel Emails

The following is a still-active fanstuff. The following is the revision as on 22:32, 8 February 2010 (UTC)

BLUEBRY: i bet this is on deviantart somewhere

ZAREL E-MAILS
Yellow dragon action

SKUB: "Yellow Dragon Action"? Why do I have a sinking feeling about this?

On the return to Free Country, USA (or rather Zarel's arrival), Zarel Lewis, 17 and a half,

NACHOMAN: i'm onwy twee and a hawf yeaws owd

decided to open up his own E-Mail checking show to please the fans and answer their questions.

SKUB: Dear penthouse forum, I never thought this would happen to me,

E-Mail List

ZarelMails: Email List

Scroll Theme of the Time:
ZAREL: Hello? {knocks on screen a bit} Scroll Buttons?

CHWOKA: They went away because nobody likes you.
BLUEBRY: file a missing persons report

Current Computer: Cappy DT8

BLUEBRY: more li-no, too easy

---

10. dream house
9. art
8. der cheat
7. dragon questiones

BLUEBRY: questions

6. robot
5. games

SKUB: OH I HOPE HE TALKS ABOUT TEAM FORTRESS OR MEGA MAN
CHWOKA: Nah, probably just the games he plays with himself at night.
SKUB: WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE?!
{canned laughs}

4. spelunking
3. billion dollars
2. style
1. love limerick

DINOSHAUR: Fun fact, there is no love in Limerick. It's an awful place.

Computer Archive

Cappy DT8 (Emails 1-?)

"The Cappy DT8. Get ahead in life with the Cappy."

Zarel's first computer. The Cappy is a relatively old computer from the early 2000s,

CHWOKA: Wait, so Zarel didn't have a computer until after 9/11? What a pitiful sack of loser.
NACHOMAN: i'm pretty sure he didn't figure out how to check email on it until several months ago

but still works efficiently. It can play games, surf the web, and most importantly, check email.

SKUB: If it can't time travel then I'm out of here.

Scroll Theme Archive

• ZAREL: Hello? {knocks on screen a bit} Scroll Buttons? (Emails 1-?)

NACHOMAN: "Zarel Lewis: 2010 - ????"

Inbox

Drop an email for Zarel here.

NACHOMAN: oh you bet I will

Randomize

{Upon clicking the option, Zarel clicks a key that makes his computer roulette through the available emails. To stop, he raises a fist and slams the keyboard to make it stop.}

SKUB: Not how computers work there buddie
BLUEBRY: one of those keys has gotta stop it

Represent. \m/(-_-)\m/

BLUEBRY: so hxc

This user thinks Zarel Emails are sweet.

BLUEBRY: ahahahahahahhahahahashhahahhahaha sure

{{userbox|1=#999999|2=yellow|3=white|4=14|5=black|6=[[Image:QOTW_head_zarel.png|50px|Zarel Emails]]|7=8|8=black|9=This user thinks [[Zarel Emails]] are sweet.|10=solid|11=1 }}

Closing Comments

CHWOKA: You know, that was in a completely different league of bad than the other stuff we've done.

BLUEBRY: There were some laugh-worthy moments, not gonna lie.

NACHOMAN: It wasn't that bad. So, surely the stuff we riff doesn't get worse, right guys?

....right?

{Chwoka gets up and walks away. Skub and Bluebry follow.}

NACHOMAN: ...Guys?

{All the lights turn off.}