RiffText/MFT3K/The Adventures of Domo and T Pedo/cooler

{Domo is watching Scrubs while siting on the coach.}

CHWOKA: It baffles me why they made a character like Scrubs so much, because that means Scrubs is a favorite of one of them, and this show has nothing in common with Scrubs at all.

NOXIGAR: Uh, yeah.
NOXIGAR: Although their liking of Scrubs has nothing to do with anything. If they liked Firefly or something, it wouldn't matter either.

COACH Z: GET ORF OF ME!

SKUB: honestar runners rule

DOMO: RAWR!

{Domo eats the Coach's body

CHWOKA: , leaving only his soul.

and moves to the couch. Pause a few seconds.

CHWOKA: DOCTR OGANABLEUGH

NOXIGAR: A tad dated, even for Bell and his compatriots, dontcha think?

T Pedo runs onscreen holding a shotgun}

T PEDO: DOMO, HELP! IT'S-

{Suddenly, a giant monster bursts through the wall and eats T Pedo}

DOMO: AH SHI-

CHWOKA: that's not iiiit

{pulls out sniper rifle from a cushion and fires it at the monster}

SKUB: "So that's where it slipped off to! Hell, remote's prolly down there too!"

{the monster explodes, covering the walls with blood.

CHWOKA: A metal band asks if they can shoot their music video in this room.

NOXIGAR: HA ! HA ! HA ! HA !

NOXIGAR: Yes, I steal jokes.

NOXIGAR: This guy is poiiiissssoooooooonnnnnnnn

T Pedo lands on the ground}

CHWOKA: lookin' like a fool with ya lands on the ground

NOXIGAR: Also dated.

DOMO: LEMON! BELL! BIG MAC! COME IN HERE!

CHWOKA: DROP AND GIVE ME TWENTY!

NOXIGAR: Last time I gave someone twenty it was twenty kills to my AD carry Twitch.

{They rush in}

'CHWOKA: tom sawyer is a pretty cool song i guess but i don't get people who say they're the best band ever

DOMO: We have some paranormal activity here.

SKUB: "But don't worry—it's not really as scary as everybody said it was."
CHWOKA: What we have here is a failure to communicate. </bush presidency>

Now Pedo, what's that you were gonna tell me?

T PEDO: Well, I was going to tell you about the other giant monster.

{A giant monster that looks similar to Hedorah burst through the wall and absorbs Bell}

SKUB: So Hedorah
CHWOKA: Friend to all children, and thus natural enemy and T Pedo.

DOMO: AHHHHHHH {Throws Big Mac at the monster}

SKUB: "I SAID NO TOMATOES" {punches the ocean}

MONSTER: ... {breaks Big Mac in half}

DOMO: NOOOOO!

CHWOKA: "NOT BIG MAC, THE THING THAT WE'VE REVIVED LIKE TWENTY TIMES NOW!"

NOXIGAR: Last time I revived an idea like twenty times now it involved poisoning someone's drink with Benadryl.

{pulls out rifle and shoots.}

LEMON: Donut worry! {Lemon throws some fire at the monster.

CHWOKA: AH FUCK MY HAND WHY DID I THINK IT WAS A GOOD IDEA TO HOLD FIRE

after that he turns into Melon.

SKUB: Is it a lemon? A melon? A lemomelon?
CHWOKA: no its like sprite

T PEDO: ...What the hell?

{the monster absorbs the fire and the bullet}

MELON: ... I STAB.

CHWOKA: I STAB YOU STAB

NOXIGAR: I CHECK YOU CHECK

{stabs the monster}

SKUB: "I VICTORY, RETIRE CAVE"

T PEDO: You idiot, you can't stab something with your hand!

SKUB: Oh you!!
CHWOKA: This is what happens when you use dialogue instead of action brackets to describe an action.

{the monster absorbs Melon}

T PEDO: ...Crap.

DOMO: There's only one thing to do... {Domo summons the A-team. they assault the monster.}

SKUB: Timely reference brah.
CHWOKA: I never want to hear the word "assault" used in this show again, especially in regards to T Pedo.

NOXIGAR: The frontal assault's happening.

NOXIGAR: They're doing it.
NOXIGAR: They're making this

NOXIGAR: HAPPEN.

Go get 'em, Mr T! Not you, Hannabal!

{a ball that has Hannah Montana's face on it bounces onscreen}

HANNAH-BALL: Aww...

HANNABAL: {...picks up Hannah-Ball and throws her at the monster.}

SKUB: S-so did Melon or whoever not get the fact that he made a typo when it was made clear by his co-author that sfHSAFHSDfhSFHSDH

NOXIGAR: Yes! My Benadryl poison is working!
NOXIGAR: Had a little lip poison in case of an emergency

{the monster absorbs Hannah-Ball and grows blond hair, and a microphone juts out of his eye. The monster growls in confusion}

{Domo sneezes on the monster}

CHWOKA: Can't he just integrate with the previous line

DOMO: Yeah, NOW what you gonna do?

CHWOKA: Whachu gonna do... now??? Whachu gonna do... this time???

{the monster turns green and starts oozing some kind of viscous

CHWOKA: sid viscous

NOXIGAR: I could've sworn the viscous gas should've suffocated Chwoka by now.
NOXIGAR: Tannenbaum, you rascal! Did you disable my traps?

fluid out of everywhere on its body.}

DOMO: Oh crap, I had AIDS when I sneezed on you but I'm magic so now I'm cured now.

SKUB: Turning green and oozing fluids. Those are symptoms of AIDS.

NOXIGAR: No, that would be a different poison I concocted. You will morph into a Cobra Commander under my control.

{The monster grows a mouth

CHWOKA: wait, how
{Chwoka raises a gun to his head.}
CHWOKA: how

NOXIGAR: The safety's permanently lodged. Enjoy the slow, painful demise.

and tries to growl in disgust, but all that comes out is vomit}

{Domo pulls out a knife and stabs the monster.

CHWOKA: again, why can't he just make this part of the previous action bracket

The monster absorbs the knife and spikes jut out of his hands. The monster vomits in confusion.}

DOMO: He Vomited Melon!

CHWOKA: not a good band name

{throws T Pedo at the monster}

CHWOKA: time, time, time, time, TIME, to understand the monster

<blockquote.{Noxigar snaps his fingers}
{Noxigar does the step.}
{He can do it by himself. Let him see you do it.}
{Yeah.}</blockquote>

{The monster absorbs T Pedo, and gains some kind of translucence, similar to that of the Horrible Gelatinous Blob, revealing T Pedo, along with everything else he's absorbed}

SKUB: Is it... is it over? Like, for real?
{Skub cries tears of joy and also a yule log.}

NOXIGAR: And now for the gas to work...