Zarel Emails/39

Zarel E-Mail #39

Zarel gets fit. Sports ensue.

Cast (in order of appearance): Zarel, Fang, Pter, Strong Sad, King of Town, The Cheat, Foxx (Easter egg), Bubs (Easter egg), Coach Z (Easter egg)

Places: The Roomy-Vac, Zarel's Bathroom, The Field, Gymnasium, The Foxxhole (Easter egg), Bubs' Concession Stand (Easter egg)

Transcript

ZAREL: {sings} Start the day with some email, and The Cheat peeing on your mailbox!

subj: exercise

Dear Zarellious,
I'm out of shape, and I'm looking for some tips on exercising.
What do you recommend?
Fatfully yours
Skid Peedy

{Zarel says "which evolves into Fangdreigon" after "Zarellious"}

ZAREL: {typing} Eww! Skid, I didn't have to know that you just peed as you were sending this. {clears screen} But exercising tips, eh? Well, I haven't really been on the go since I started checking emails. Come to think of it, I must be out of shape! Let me check.

{Zarel leaves. Cut to his bathroom. Fang has a towel around his waist and is just getting out of the shower.}

ZAREL: {lifts shirt a bit, his body looks emaciated and thin} Does this look out of shape to you?

FANG: Looks more like "out-of-eat." Have you been eating lately?

ZAREL: Not any more than usual...

FANG: If anything, you should really eat something. Remember that one time you went biking on an empty stomach?

{Flashback of Zarel in The Field. He's riding his bike when all of a sudden his spine cracks back and he gags, falling off the bike.}

ZAREL: That was because I swallowed a bug.

FANG: Yeah, and you did because it was your first meal of the day!

ZAREL: Listen, Where's Wolfo; I don't need your lectures here. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to go take your advice and show Skidmark here my top-of-the-line exercise regimen!

{Cut to the Gymnasium. Zarel is geared up in basketball clothing}

ZAREL: Put down those diaries, wimpy kids, because it's time for Zarel's "Top O'De Line" Training Regimen...tals!

ZAREL: I'm here to get you fit, hit, and shhhhhh-aped up and in shape! Now who's-a be's-a you's guys?

{cut to a shot of Strong Sad, Pter, and the King of Town all in track gear}

STRONG SAD: Um, coach? When does practice end?

KING OF TOWN: I hope there's an after-exercise garlic and butter buffet!

PTER: Um...the point is to eat less calories, King.

KING OF TOWN: Buns to that! I need to calorie load every time I do my daily exercises!

PTER: What is your daily exercise, King?

{Cut to the King of Town's castle. He is sitting watching TV and then gets up}

KING OF TOWN: Poopsmith! Prepare my hourly calorie load!

ZAREL: Alright, you guys who totally suck and purple football-

PTER: {offscreen} I told you I'm not a football!

ZAREL: It's time for the first mental regiment...The Spheroid-ining! Uno! Dos! Spanish number for "three!" HWOOYAH!

{Zarel poses karate style, ready to attack, but then turns around and grabs the pitching machine and shoots several types of sport balls at them. All three start yelling ad libs as they are getting pelted}

KING OF TOWN: {offscreen} I hope one of them's a meatball!

{Cut to another room where Pter is running(?) in a hamster wheel, which is connected to a treadmill that the King of Town is running on, which is powering a treadmill Strong Sad is running on.}

ZAREL: Come on, come on! Put your backs into it! Yous guys realizes thises ises an exercises to power ups your teamwork...s! {Goes to Pter} Run! Run! You don't wanna let your team down right?

PTER: How am I even doing this?!

{Cut back to the Gymnasium, the three are in a sumo ring, with The Cheat in the center.}

{The Cheat looks at all three. They all dive on The Cheat and he screams}

THE CHEAT: {struggling The Cheat screams}

ZAREL: Technical flagrant!

{A buzzer is heard and the three are all dizzy while The Cheat runs in panic. Zarel hits the King of Town with a basketball}

ZAREL: Foul foul on the King of Towel for bending the rules of "No Eating The Cheat!"

KING OF TOWN: Oh, doo hoo...

{Cut back to the Roomy-Vac}

ZAREL: So there you are, Totally Not Videlectrix Reference. If I could sum up the success of my training whatchamacallits in one word...Balls. Lots and lots of balls. Flying, air-pumped, balls. This will be taken very much out of context by some random viewer. The Paper, please shut me up.

{The Paper}

Easter Eggs

• Click on "Zarellious" after Zarel reads it to see pictures of Zarel and Fang that look similar to the Pokemon Zweilious and Hydreigon.
• Click on the King of Town when he says "calorie load" to see a picture of his "calorie load." It's a turkey covered in mashed potatos, ranch dressing, hot sauce, melted cheese, lettuce, slices of bacon, full sticks of butter, and a cupcake on top.
• Click on "viewer" at the end for a scene. (Easter Egg Transcript 1)
• Click on "whatchamacallits" at the end for a scene. (Easter Egg Transcript 2)

Easter Egg Transcript 1

{Cut to the Foxxhole where Zarel Emails is being watched on a TV by a rather excited-looking Foxx.}

ZAREL: {on the television} I'm out of shape, and I'm looking for some tips on exercising. What do you recommend-

FOXX: Reps! Cardio! Strength training! This email was practically tailor-made for me!

Easter Egg Transcript 2

{Cut to Bubs' Concession Stand where Coach Z and Bubs are talking.}

BUBS: Did you hear? The Gymnasium {said as "gym-nausium} has got itself a new tall, lanky, and quite strapping coach! With a Z in his name!

COACH Z: Heresy! He's trying to steal my thander!

Trivia

• Zarel's line after "Zarellious" is a reference to the Pokemon Zweilious and Hydreigon.
• Zarel calling Pter a football refers back to sports.
• The Easter Egg with Foxx is in reference to the sbemail: love poems.