(even if you aren't vegan)
RiffText/MFT3K/Records of Bell/6
Summary
Bell and company go on a month-long cruise.
Cast: Tracy, Gilligan, Sarah McAllister, Kuro, Kinzo, Bling, Don Skull, Im a bell, Cruise Stewards, Five Poker Players
Places: Banquet Hall, Bell's House, Dock, Cruise Ship
Episode Information: 106-Never Bring Embarrassments On Cruises With You
Insult: [CENSORED BY THE FCC]
Credit Joke: Tinfoil Hat-Wearers
BLUEBRY: we are not a joke >:(
NOXIGAR: Do ho ho ho, that's what you think!
Transcript
{fade in from black to a banquet hall. Bell, Sarah, Don Skull, Kuro, Kan, and Kinzo are sitting at the table, dead. Pause 5 seconds}
TRACY & GILLIGAN:{run onscreen} DON'T DRINK THE WINE!!!
SKULLB: DON'T DRINK THE WATER
BLUEBRY: I HEAR THEY PUT SOMETHING IN IT. T-TO MAKE YOU FORGET
{cue theme song. cut to Bell's living room. Tracy, Sarah, Kuro, Kinzo, Bling, and Don Skull are there watching SkullB Show
SKULLB: whhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAT
NOXIGAR: {singing} Shout, shout
LET IT ALL OUT
These are the things I can do without
COME ON
I'm talking to you
COME ON
reruns.
CHWOKA: You can tell the airdate just by looking at it.
Bell runs in holding a letter}
IM A BELL: HEY GUYS! GUESS WHAT WE GOT IN THE MA-
EVERYONE BUT BELL: SHH!
IM A BELL: Well, FINE! I guess I'll just go on the ALL EXPENSES PAID MONTH-LONG CRUISE by myself!
BLUEBRY: Okay you do that then.
EVERYONE BUT BELL: ... {eyes widen, jump on Bell} SORRYSORRYSORRYLETUSGOONTHECRUISE
SKULLB: GOON THE CRUISE
CHWOKA: They say all of this in unison? They should take up choir singing.
PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE!!!!!
IM A BELL: Ummmmm... Fine. Get packing. the cruise ship leaves in two hours.
BLUEBRY: Mail is very precise where bell lives.
Oh, and, don't worry. Our cabins have internet access.
SKULLB: "It doesn't have beds, but hey. Only the necessities!"
KURO: Good.
CHWOKA: Internet access will surely make sure the boat won't tip.
DON SKULL: How many cabins do we get?
IM A BELL: If we're ALL going... Six cabins.
BLING: There are SEVEN of us.
IM A BELL: I'm gonna share a cabin with Sarah.
SKULLB: THE JOKE IS THAT THEY WILL HAVE SEX
NOXIGAR: Aw, telling the viewers what the joke is? Isn't that nice?
BLING: Ah.
{cut to a dock. A large, luxury cruise liner is there. Many people are boarding it. Bell and company walk in onscreen with many suitcases}
CRUISE STEWARD: Hello, may I see your tickets?
IM A BELL:{hands the steward the letter} I got this in the mail.
CRUISE STEWARD: Ah, you are the winner of the all expenses paid trip. How many are you bringing?
IM A BELL: Counting me, seven.
CRUISE STEWARD: Ah, I see... How many cabins will you be needing?
IM A BELL: Six, please.
SKULLB: THE ACTION NEVER STOPS
CRUISE STEWARD: Oh! Very good. I was afraid someone would have to stay in an average, for we only have six luxury cabins left.
SKULLB: After all, we all know these people deserve only the best
KINZO: Heh. Lucky us.
IM A BELL: Quiet, you.
CRUISE STEWARD: ... I'll lead you to your cabins...
{cut to on the cruise ship. The steward is leading everyone to their cabins. Kinzo spies a casino}
BLUEBRY: Spies? Casino? This is just some James Bond rip.
NOXIGAR: "All it needs is the music and then it demands a lawsuit!"
KINZO:{hands Bell his luggage} Put these in my room for me, 'kay? {runs into casino}
IM A BELL: ...Right. Whatever.
{cut to a few minutes later. Only Bell and Sarah don't have a cabin yet}
CRUISE STEWARD: And HERE- {gestures toward a luxury cabin} is YOUR cabin.
IM A BELL: Thank you, sir.
{the steward walks offscreen. Im a bell and Sarah walk into the cabin. Cut to inside it}
IM A BELL:{sets suitcase down} Well, this is it. What d'you think?
SARAH: It's nice, I guess.
BLUEBRY: then they make out
IM A BELL: What's wrong?
BLUEBRY: you aren't making out yet
{Noxigar groans}
NOXIGAR: You really want a make out scene don't you?
SARAH: Well, one, I wasn't really expecting to spend a month on a cruise ship. And two, wat
BLUEBRY: what
about work? You, me, and Tracy all have jobs.
SKULLB: Watching anime and eating Pocky is not a job. Shut up.
NOXIGAR: WHY HELLO THERE RACIST STEREOTYPE LONG TIME NO SEE DID YOU JUST GET OUT OF REHAB?
IM A BELL: Oh yeah. Hold on. {disappears. reappears a few seconds later} I took care of it. I retroactively planned a month long paid vacation for all three of us.
SKULLB: I JUST DID IT RETROACTIVELY
SARAH: Good.
{cut to the casino. Kinzo is playing poker with five other people on the cruise. He has many poker chips next to him}
PLAYER 1: How? HOW AM I LOSIN'? I'm a GREAT poker player!
PLAYER 2: Hey, red-skin! How're you so good?
SKULLB: "You already took my land, you don't need to call me names."
PLAYER 3: I say he's cheatin'!
PLAYER 4: If you are, I'll KILL YA.
BLUEBRY: Dude, he's a major badass too, I wouldn't put it past him !!!
KINZO: I'm a demon. I'm naturally good at all types of gambling.
PLAYER 3: Does that mean I'm right?
PLAYER 5: I think all that metal is some sort of cheatin' device!
SKULLB: "One of those dad-gum cheat-a-ma-jiggies!"
KINZO: ... I'll just collect my winnings now... {grabs poker chips and runs off}
PLAYER 1: GET 'EM!
{the five poker layers
SKULLB: I'd like to poke her layers.
NOXIGAR: DAMN IT, SKULLBUGGY!
chase Kinzo offscreen. Cut to the deck, where Kinzo is chased onscreen}
KINZO: AAAAHHH!!! {runs into own cabin, locks door}
{the five poker players slam into the door. They stars
BLUEBRY: start
banging on the door. Cut to an hour later. There is now a cruise steward talking to them}
CRUISE STEWARD: Excuse me, sirs, but the other people on board this cruise liner have been complaining about the noise. Please stop, or I will have to- {eyes turn red} -EAT YOUR SOULS- {eyes turn normal} -lock you in the brig.
SKULLB: Cruise ships always have brigs.
{the poker player run off scared. Cut to a restaurant aboard the ship. Bell and company are sitting at a table}
IM A BELL: Everyone? Eat much and sleep well. It'll be a long month.
TRACY: It's only six episodes.
BLUEBRY: Six too many.
IM A BELL: What?
TRACY:{quickly} What?
{fade to black. cue the credits}
SKULLB: what
NOXIGAR: I agree.