RiffText/DB:R/5

{open to an arena not unlike those from Dragon Ball. Im a bell and Chaos are standing upon it}

IM A BELL: The final battel of the tournament. You versus me, Chaos.

ERIC: You spelled "battle" wrong.

CHAOS: Yes, yes it is.

IM A BELL: Are you ready to be humiliated?

CHAOS: ...I have no idea what you are talking about, Bell.

ERIC: Ah'm dun' even 'now what doos humeelation meen.

IM A BELL: There were thirty-two contestants in the beginning. We have evaded batteling

ERIC: You spelled "battling" wrong.

eachother, until now, when we are the only two unbeaten. You created this tournament, and you said you will give 10 million dollars to the winner of the tournament. Are you ready to lose the tournament you created, and give me the 10 mil?

CHAOS:{sighs} Bell, once again, you underestimate me. You think you're more powerful than you really are.

IM A BELL: We'll see about that. ...LET'S JUST FIGHT ALREADY.

CHAOS: Right! {disappears}

IM A BELL:{looks around} Where did he...

{Chaos appears above Bell, flying down onto him with is foot outstretched. Bell sees him, grabs his leg, and flings him into the ground. Chaos gets up, pulls out a sword, and slices his arm off}

IM A BELL: ...FFFFFFFF

ERIC: --amily dinners are boring.

{another arm grows in its place. It is more tentacle-like and green. Bell stretches the tentacle around Chaos' neck and starts choking him}

CHAOS: ACK. {chops off the tentacle arm}

IM A BELL:{another arm grows in its place. This time it is the same as the original arm} RAZZLE DAZZLE

CHAOS: ...W-what the hell is THAT supposed to mean?

IM A BELL: I'M COMPLETELY INSANE.

ERIC: {imitating I'm A Bell} IT IS A GREAT PLOTHOLE.

ALLEYOOP {jumps inside own mouth, transforms into a giant mecha}

ERIC: Oh god what just happened here I dont even

CHAOS: ...Wh-Er-Hmm-I-Uhh-FFFFFFFFF. {transforms into Demon Chaos, snaps fingers}

{Bell lights on fire and then freezes into a block of ice. He falls over and shatters. Each piece transforms into a Bell clone}

BELL CLONES: CAN YOU DESTROY US ALL?

DEMON CHAOS: Gladly.

BELL CLONES: HAVE AT YE {they all pull out swords and fly towards Demon Chaos}

DEMON CHAOS: AAH! {starts kicking all the clones off the stage and into the crowds. Once they hit the crowds, they explode. After a while, they are all seemingly destroyed}

ERIC: I cannot think of anything coherent to say right now.

That's the last of th-

CHILD'S VOICE: Excuse me, sir...

DEMON CHAOS: What the-{turns around to see a child-like Bell with an oversized lollipop}

BELL-CHILD: Are you my daddy?

DEMON CHAOS: EWW, WHAT THE HELL? {starts stomping on the Bell-child, until it explodes into a pool of blood}

ERIC: EW, A KID! GOOD THING I WAS BORN AT THE AGE OF 45.

{Bell appears in front of Demon Chaos}

IM A BELL: Okay, enough of that. {pulls out a large sword, and flings it at Demon Chaos. It stabs him in the arm}

ERIC: It's funny because he says "enough of that" but basically does what they've been doing for the past minutes. The irony is killing me.

DEMON CHAOS: ...Ow?

IM A BELL: Hahaha.

ERIC: haha i broke ur grill

{Hare Hare Yukai starts playing}

ERIC: {imitating I'm A Bell} So, like, haha, I'm so clever, hahaha, I'm going, heh, to reference something from JAPAN! Nobody has, haha, ever thought of that, and everyone will get it, right guys? Guys?

IM A BELL: Huh? {pulls out a cellphone}

CELLPHONE: Attention, Bell. You are out of clones. Do you want to make some more?

IM A BELL: ...CRAP

CELLPHONE: If yes, click 1. If no, click 2.

IM A BELL: Okay... {is about to press 1, but Demon Chaos warps in front of him, rips the sword out of his arm, and stabs it into Bell's chest, and into the ground, pinning him onto it}

{the cellphone bounces off of Bell's head, pressing the 2 button. It then lands on the ground}

CELLPHONE: You have chosen "No". Do you want to make clones at a later d-

{Demon Chaos steps on the cellphone, crushing it}

DEMON CHAOS: Get up, Bell. I know you're not dead. It's not funny. ...Seriously, get up. ...There's one of your clones behind me, isn't there? {turns around, finds nothing} ... Wait... {looks up, sees nothing} ... {explodes into a ball of fire, engulfing the stage} WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU, BELL?!!! I KNOW YOU'RE HERE SOMEWHWERE!!!! COME OUT OF YOUR HIDING AND FIGHT ME, YOU WUSS!!!!! ...COME OUT HERE, GODDAMMIT!!!!!!

ERIC: Please don't go I'm sorry I killed you, you're my only friend don't leave me alone ;_;

{Bell appears in front of Demon Chaos, floating}

DEMON CHAOS: THERE YOU ARE, YOU STUPID ASSHOLE!

ERIC: And the ratings have gone through the roof.

{tries to punch Bell, but his fist goes right through him} W-what? What the hell are you doing?

IM A BELL: Ahahaha. Silly Chaos, Trix are for kids!

ERIC: So on-topic.

DEMON CHAOS: Dammit, Bell! Tell me what mockery of fighting THIS is supposed to be!

IM A BELL: Well, do you know the way I am immortal?

DEMON CHAOS: ...An infinite amount of clones, right?

IM A BELL: Close. I do not have an infinite supply. I simply make more when I run out.

ERIC: That is completely the opposite of infinite supplies.

However, when I don't make more, and my last clone dies, can you guess what happens?

DEMON CHAOS: ...You actually die?

IM A BELL: Correct.

ERIC: Meaning he's not immortal at all. Jerk, you've been lying to us all this time!

DEMON CHAOS: ...Can't you just tell someone to make more?

ERIC: Because, you know, I miss you ;_;

IM A BELL: I suppose, but the only way they can, unless they travel into deep space to where my clone factory is held, is if they press the 1 button on a cellphone that alerts me of clone updates. The one you just crushed.

DEMON CHAOS: ...But the cellphone hit a key when it hit your head.

IM A BELL: That was the 2 button.

ERIC: Let's rephrase what just happened, it'll please the viewers.

It tells the factory NOT to make clones then. Thanks, Chaos. You just killed me. I'd shake your hand, but I'm a ghost. Oh, and, you obviously know of Earth's planned cataclysm, correct?

DEMON CHAOS: ...Yes? And?

IM A BELL: I have a thick layer of insanity around the Earth shielding it from cataclysm. And now that I'm dead, the insanity is disappearing.

ERIC: That's ozone, you moron.

DEMON CHAOS: ...Crap.

IM A BELL: I expect the Earth to be destroyed in... Oh, an hour, or so. Ciao! {disappears}

DEMON CHAOS:{transforms back into normal Chaos} ...I won, I guess.

ERIC: I mean, he died, but I'm not THAT sure.

{five second pause. The crowd starts screaming and they start chasing Chaos. He steps on the camera,

ERIC: Hey there fourth wall! I get to break you twice!

ending the scene. Cut to Bell floating around town. A few buildings are already starting to crumble. A black figure

ERIC: racists

appears before Bell}

BLACK FIGURE: Hello, Bell.

IM A BELL: AAH! WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?

BLACK FIGURE: ...My name is not important.

IM A BELL: ...is it Slartibartfast?

ERIC: please no

BLACK FIGURE: No, you stupid git. Of course not.

IM A BELL: Okay. ...So, what do you want from me?

BLACK FIGURE: You will see. You... Will... See...

ERIC: That... I... can... speak... very... slowly...

IM A BELL: ...What?

ERIC: I'm as clueless as you pal, I've never seen such a terrible plot twist.

BLACK FIGURE:{sighs} Just follow me. {starts walking away}

{Bell follows the black figure}

END OF CHAPTER

ERIC: Thank God this was the only one made. I don't wanna know what happened before and what happens after this. I just need to take my headache pills now.