(even if you aren't vegan)
RiffText/AruseusEmails/vore
Cast {in order of appearance}: Aruseus, Tom, Pter, Zarel, Van, Fang, Cody, Austin, Jay, Cyrus, Tom
NAMINE: And Arceus goes back to using too many characters for the episode's own good. I thought it'd be a trend from 108 onward where the writing quality actually improved.
Places: Room 232, Food Court
Computer: SkyPod
Date: February 24th, 2009
Transcript
{Cut to Aruseus' Dorm at night, Aruseus and Tom are walking in}
ARUSEUS: Man...I'm starving, and the food court's closed.
NAMINE: The episode is titled "vore" and they're talking about food.
{Noxigar vomits. Namine pats him on the back.}
TOM: I'd say drive to the nearest McDonalds or something. Get something there.
ARUSEUS: No thank you, I'd rather sleep.
TOM: Oh no...no more sleeping on an empty stomach. Last time you ate my pillow. Now I have to use a couch pillow for my bed!
ARUSEUS: I'll be fine. What could go wrong?
TOM: ...fine. Good night.
ARUSEUS: {yawn} Good night.
{Aruseus starts to snore. His stomach grumbles once. Fade to black and then into the next day.}
NAMINE: Your body would force you awake to actually nourish it by an early amount, especially if you already were starving before you slept.
ARUSEUS: {yawn, waking up} Good morning, Monstropolis U! I feel...really hungry. To the food court, and then to my physics class!
{Aruseus walks out. Cut to the food court, a throng of people are around where the food is obtained. Various squabbles are heard}
FOOD CLERK: Sorry man, we're fresh out. Someone must of robbed us of all our food.
ARUSEUS: I bet it was Robin Food who did this!
NAMINE: Robin... Food...
TOM: Wait, you mean they didn't cancel KND?
NAMINE: That show wasn't very good. It should've been cancelled early on.
PTER: Hey Aruseus. You hear? Food court got robbed. Robber must've been real clever.
ARUSEUS: I know, right?
PTER: Eh...nothing to worry about. I'll leave this crowd of morons to squabble over a lack of food. I'm going to my car.
{Pter slides away}
TOM: How does he even drive?
ARUSEUS: I guess he pushes the pedal with his tail. I'll go follow him.
{Cut to the front door of the campus. Pter attempts to open it.}
PTER: It's locked? It's LOCKED?!
ARUSEUS: Don't panic, man. Goes against your bio.
NAMINE: Ha ha ha YOU BROKE THE FOURTH WALL FOR THE UMPTEENTH TIME
PTER: Screw the fourth wall breaking! Check the other doors!
ARUSEUS: {runs off} This one's locked, that's locked, I think every door is locked! This theif is a clever one indeed.
PTER: Only one think left to do... {Pter flies at the glass door, but it bounces him back like it was rubber}
ARUSEUS: Just like on Spongebob...oh God, TJ's gonna kill me for referencing that.
PTER: What the crap?! Every window door, this place is inescapable, we lack food...EVERYONE'S IN A PANIC. I'm seriously going to start tearing my hair out...
ARUSEUS: Well, let's survive for now. We have to go back to the food court to break the news.
{Cut to the food court, everyone is in a panic}
ARUSEUS: Holy shit, it's a hellhole in here!
NAMINE: I found a silver lining: Arceus is finally starting to take advantage of the fact curses are accessible on the WUW.
PTER: There's Zarel! He's the only one who seems content...
{Cut to Zarel, he's rather bloated}
PTER: Zarel...you look satisfied. What the hell did you eat and where did you find it?
ZAREL: It was a hard catch, but I caught it right here in the food court! I must say, it was healthy and delicious.
{Something starts punching inside Zarel}
NAMINE: Oh crap. I should probably skip this next part since it's so intensely predictable and, while a somewhat witty joke, not really all that funny in hindsight.
VAN: {muffled} LET ME OUT OF HERE!
ZAREL: Quiet, you!
ARUSEUS: You...
PTER: ...ate Van?! That's...
ARUSEUS: That's horrible!
PTER: {psychotic} Are you kidding?! That's genius! Fang...get over here!
{Cut to Fang. Pter jumps on him and bites his head. Pter removes it and eats it, along with eating the rest of Fang all alive. Pter's belly bulges out, and he lays down content and belches}
PTER: Aw...that's good.
FANG: {muffled} Let me out now!
PTER: NEVER!
ARUSEUS: Holy God they're eating each other!
NAMINE: Dude, if you're going to make a reference to a horrible movie like Troll, at least finish the reference or something.
{Aruseus looks around. He sees Austin grab Cody and swallow him whole, he sees Wolf stuff Cyrus in his mouth and gulp, each time they swallow the other person, their bellies all bulge out and they lay contently smiling on the ground.}
NAMINE: So wait this has resorted to cannibalism?
ARUSEUS: I have to get out of here!
{Aruseus bolts to his dorm. Cut to Room 232}
ARUSEUS: {frantically typing on the SkyPod} I don't know how much I have longer to live before I become someone's dinner! I need help! 911! EMERGENCY! S.O.S! I'M- {he stops} AAAAAAAAAAH!!!!
{Pan to see a bloated Tom laying on his bed}
TOM: {loud belch}
{Cut to Aruseus waking up at night...}
ARUSEUS: Wow...Tom was right. I think my hunger went away... {Aruseus looks at Tom's bed to see no pillow on it} Aw...dammit!
NAMINE: And that's why you don't go to sleep starving.
{The Paper}