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RiffText/AruseusEmails/summer

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Cast {in order of appearance}: Aruseus, Strong Mad, Tom, Homestar, Fang, Strong Bad, Ert Plus

NAMINE: Oh hey, characters who I'm at least partially familiar with. Again, I wonder what the point of this is.

Places: Computer Room, The Pool, The Flitzer, A Beach, An Arcade

Computer: E-Mach 1000

Date: August 11th, 2007

NAMINE: It's too bad I skipped Email 50, or I'd have tried to make notice of the date discrepancy.

Transcript

ARUSEUS: {singing} Break down! And check your email all day long... {clicks the email icon}

Subject:summer bummer plummer

Hey, hey, you, you,
What are your summer plans Aruseeeeeeeeeeus
Tater sauce,
-Sterrence88

NAMINE: You mean tartar sauce, right?

ARUSEUS: {typing} Summer plans? Well, I think the perfect time to send this would be May, but alright. I'll tell you what I planned for back in May.

{Aruseus clears the screen}

ARUSEUS: Ok, Sterreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeence88. Let's view Aruseus' summer plans.

NAMINE: From almost exactly three months ago.

{A list comes up, and it plays "A Stupid Barber" from Dance Dance Revolution SuperNOVA in the background throughout the whole part of the toon}

ARUSEUS: {voiceover} Ok. First up on our list is...POOL TIME COOL TIME! {fanfare} I would chill at the local pool with all my buddies.

{Cut to the Pool, Aruseus is floating on a raft with a Cold One in hand}

STRONG MAD: {offscreen} CANNONBALL!

ARUSEUS: Oh carp-

NAMINE: You know you can combat that via Splash Plate, right?

{Aruseus is splashed by a wave of water, knocked off the raft}

{Cut back to the list}

ARUSEUS: {voiceover} Riding in at number two is Amusment

NAMINE: Amusement

Parks. Riding rides and pukin' after them.

NAMINE: I don't exactly remember puking after rides.

{Cut to a carnival ride called the Flitzer, Aruseus is sitting in a car about to go down a hill}

ARUSEUS: Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

{Aruseus gets off the ride, Tom, Homestar, and Fang are at the entrance}

ARUSEUS: Oh man! That rocked! I want to get a picture! {rushes off to the picture booth}

{Cut back to the list}

ARUSEUS: Coming in at number three is going to the beach, catching waves, and other beach stuff. I like to get buried in the sand all the time, so that comes in at 3.5.

NAMINE: Why not just make it an addendum to your desire to go to the beach?

{Cut to a beach, Aruseus has his head sticking out of the sand}

ARUSEUS: Hey! Look at me! I'm a head growing out of the ground!

{Strong Bad walks by}

STRONG BAD: What the? Aruseus? We're

NAMINE: The apostrophe isn't needed.

you like...decapitated or something?

NAMINE: We are you dropped on your head as a kid?

ARUSEUS: Nope, just buried.

{Cut back to the list}

ARUSEUS: Number four is going to various arcades and winning tickets and earning stuff. My friends usually try to win tickets, but I want to go easy and do them fun prize grabbers!

{Cut to an Arcade, Aruseus and Tom stand next to a prize grabber with several plushes of Sonic, Tails, and Knuckles.}

NAMINE: I get the feeling Arceus is going to play this scene out similarly to how it would be in Lucky Star. That is, if I paid more attention to Lucky Star in rates of more than 10 seconds.

TOM: Don't waste your last 50 cents on this. You won't win.

ARUSEUS: Please?

TOM: Ok. It's your money.

{Aruseus plays the game and manages to hook a Tails by the cheek, and the crane drops it in the bin}

ARUSEUS: And on my last 50 cents! Usually I'll get him by the chest and it'll slip!

TOM: That was like a one in a hundred chance!

NAMINE: Perhaps even lower odds, given your apathy towards the crane game.

ARUSEUS: HUG ME, BROTHA!

{Aruseus hugs Tom}

TOM: Get off me or I snap your arms off.

ARUSEUS: Eep! {lets go}

NAMINE: A demigod would be scared of Tom? Ha!

{Cut back to the list}

ARUSEUS: And number five...Dance Dance Revolution. DDR. NONSTOP.

NAMINE: Why is this a separate entry on your list, as opposed to an addendum?

{Cut back to the Arcade, Aruseus and Ert Plus are playing a DDR machine}

{Cut back to E-Mach, Music stops}

ARUSEUS: {typing} Well, Sterry, those were my summer plans. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm-a go play DDR. {walks off}

NAMINE: I'm going to assume he has a not-Wii or something that allows DDR to be played. Because the Wii versions of DDR are incorrigible.

{The Paper comes down}

Fun Facts

  • The Flitzer is the name of an actual roller coaster down at one of the Boardwalks at the Jersey Shore.
  • The following events have happened to me when I went down the shore:
  • Rode The Flitzer
  • Buried from the neck down
  • Won the Tails in the prize grabber
  • the whole, "HUG ME, BROTHA!" thing, Ert was with me at the time, though he didn't say "Get off me or I snap your arms off."
  • DDR with Ert
  • Also, the line, "HUG ME, BROTHA!" comes from Drake and Josh.
  • This is another occurance of Carp/Crap.
  • This is another mention of Decaptiation.
NAMINE: Well, the fact you referenced Drake and Josh aside, I'm actually relieved you finally decide to take your Fun Facts subpage seriously.