RiffText/KickCheat E-mails/The Cheat

KickCheat E-mail #1

The first e-mail!

LIGHTNING GUY: You made it to the first! How exciting!

Homestar asks KickCheat if he is a The Cheat.

Cast (in order of appearance): KickCheat, Strong Bad, The Cheat, Homestar Runner (easter egg)

Places: The Computer room, Homestar's house (easter egg)

Computer: Kickix 500

Lines: 21

Script

KICKCHEAT: {Clicks on e-mail while talking} Checking the e-mail on this rectangle.

LIGHTNING GUY: Computers are generally rectangular, yes. They can also be as square as you sometimes.

Dear KickCheat,
Are you a The Cheat?

From Homestar Runner

KICKCHEAT: {sarcasticly} Oh this is a good first e-mail!

LIGHTNING GUY: Oh this is a good lack of spell check!

KICKCHEAT: (shouts while typing} Yes I am moron! What are you then? A marshmallow?

LIGHTNING GUY: Wait, what?

{cut to Strong Bad and The Cheat standing by KickCheat's stool}

LIGHTNING GUY: Is someone gonna clean that up?

KICKCHEAT: {surprised} Oh! Hi guys.

STRONG BAD: Talking about that marshmallow freak eh?

LIGHTNING GUY: Wait, we're talking about Homestar, right?

KICKCHEAT: {sarcasticly}

LIGHTNING GUY: sigh

Yeah!

STRONG BAD: Homestar is a marshmallow!

LIGHTNING GUY: What the crap is going on?

KICKCHEAT: {questionly}

LIGHTNING GUY: groan

Really?

STRONG BAD: Really.

THE CHEAT: {Makes some The Cheat noises}

LIGHTNING GUY: Do these The Cheat noises come with a drink?

KICKCHEAT: {questionly}

LIGHTNING GUY: You really know nothing about adverbs, do you?

Marshmallow roast? {excited} Good idea!

STRONG BAD: And while we're at it. We will buy some cold ones!

LIGHTNING GUY: And while I'm at it. I will talk like a broken robot.

KICKCHEAT: {excited} We can have a camp fire!

THE CHEAT: {Makes some The Cheat noises}

LIGHTNING GUY: We can roast those too!

KICKCHEAT: We'll go after I finish this crappy e-mail.

LIGHTNING GUY: Wait, this dude was going all giddy over a camp fire two seconds ago.

STRONG BAD: Okay!

{KickCheat faces the camera}

KICKCHEAT: Until next time. Don't send me crap!

LIGHTNING GUY: I like-a to say "holy crap".

{KickCheat, Strong Bad and The Cheat walk out of the computer room and the paper comes down saying "Click here to e-mail KickCheat at [email protected]}

Easter eggs

• Click on the internet logo to see the campfire at Homestar's house.

Script

{cut to Strong Bad, KickCheat and The Cheat having a roast in Homestar's House}

KICKCHEAT: This is one good roast!

LIGHTNING GUY: The action never stops.

STRONG BAD: {shouts} Hey waiter! We want more marshmallows!

{Homestar walks in with a bowl of marshmallows}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: More marshmallows! Why didn't you want to eat me?

LIGHTNING GUY: Hey, maybe they finally found out he wasn't actually a marsh-

KICKCHEAT: Because you failed the butt IQ test!

LIGHTNING GUY: Oh nevermind.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Ohhhhhh! Right, right!

Inside References

• Homestar has a ugly butt as shown in the Strong Bad E-mail "Butt IQ".

LIGHTNING GUY: Because everything Strong Bad says is automatically true.

• Strong Bad steals Homestar's credit card number in The Strong Bad E-mail "Credit Card".

• KickCheat refering Homestar as a marshmallow due to Homestar loving marshmallows.

LIGHTNING GUY: OH GOD MY BRAIN IT'S ABOUT TO EXPLODE