Zarel Emails/6/original

Zarel E-Mail #6

Zarel becomes a robot...or does he?

Cast (in order of appearance): Zarel, Strong Sad, Grape Nuts Robot, Strong Bad, Homestar, The Cheatbot, King Of Town, The Blacksmith, The Poopsmith, Wind-Up Zarel

Places: Zarel's House, The Stick, King's Castle

Transcript

{Cut to Zarel's Room}

ZAREL: WARNING: Using Zarel Emails as a respirator may cause side effects such as inability to breathe and wrecking balls to the torso. Ask your doctor or pharmacist.

</blockquote>

subj: what's a robutt

HERES HOPING YOU DONT
BECOME A ROBOT
CLING CLANG
WHOOPS TOO LATE

-Your own worst enemy

{Zarel screams the email with the exception of the sender's name.}

STRONG SAD: {offscreen and faint} Keep it down!

ZAREL: {typing} Too late? Too late for what? You mean that I'm turning into a robot or something? What are you supposed to mean? Wait, I know how to answer this. {clears screen, typing} Would I want to become a robot...no. But I would have a robot made of me! But...I think that I've been beat to the punch. I mean, Strong Bad has that Grape-Nuts Robot-

{Cut to The Stick, Strong Bad and the Grape Nuts Robot stand there. Homestar walks by}

ZAREL: {voiceover} -and nothing beats that!

GRAPE-NUTS ROBOT: Now spell, "carp for brains."

STRONG BAD: You hear that, Homestar? You're a carp...er...crap for brains!

HOMESTAR: What ever.

STRONG BAD: Hey, man, don't be dissin' the Grape-Nuts, The Grape-Nuts is cool. So much cooler than that old, washed-up The Cheatbot I had.

{As Strong Bad is saying this, The Cheatbot walks in}

THE CHEATBOT: Meeeehhh... {walks away}

{Cut back to the Cappy}

ZAREL: {Typing} Wait, I've got it! I need to BEST Strong Bad and get a robot that works much better than that stupid Grape-Nuts bot and hang out with it much more than Strong Bad does with his Grape-ity Nut Nut.

{Cut to the King of Town's Castle}

ZAREL: Alright, so how much are we dealing this?

KING OF TOWN: You provide me with the best cook around and I will get my homies to make you a mechanoid!

ZAREL: Sounds goo...King, did you just try to be gangster?

KING OF TOWN: Word! Blacksmith, rassle up this man a robot in the hizzy!

{The Blacksmith salutes and runs off}

ZAREL: Ooookay. I'll be back.

{Cut to the Whatsit Pile, Zarel bounds and gags the Poopsmith and stuffs him in a baseball bag.}

{Cut back to the Cappy}

ZAREL: {typing} I hope the King is true to his word. It took me several awkward mall shopping and hours of learning hypnotism to get him a quote-on-quote "good cook." If this robot of mine isn't awesome as awesome, I-

{Zarel is tapped on the shoulder}

ZAREL: For the love of Pete Sampras I need to lock my-

{Zoom out to see a rather cartoony-looking robot sporting clothing similar to Zarel's and a wind-up crank. Zarel turns to see it standing there, his jaw drops}

ZAREL: Holy crap! That looks amazing! I-I'm speechless! I...I need to show you to Strong Bad.

{Cut to the Stick, Strong Bad and the Grape-Nuts Robot are there, Zarel and Wind-Up Zarel walk in}

ZAREL: Impressed?

STRONG BAD: Hm. Somewhat. But can it talk?

ZAREL: I dunno, he ain't talking much. Well, give him some time and he'll speak up.

GRAPE-NUTS ROBOT: Kiss the butt.

STRONG BAD: You tell him!

WIND-UP ZAREL: {in a southeastern accent} You are...an Englishman...with a dress!

GRAPE-NUTS ROBOT: {5 second pause} Gah.

{The Paper}

Easter Eggs

• Click on Strong Bad to see what happened to The Poopsmith.

Easter Egg Transcript

{Cut to the King's Castle. The Poopsmith is wearing an apron that says "Auntie Betty" and washing dishes, after 5 seconds, it cut backs to the previous scene.}

Fun Facts

• The intro is a take on a scene from Arfenhouse Teh Movie 6. WARNING: NOT SUITABLE FOR YOUNG AUDIENCES.
• The Cheatbot is from SBEmail: technology.
• Wind-Up Zarel is a complete take, voice and appearance-wise, on an old What A Cartoon! character, Wind-Up Wolf. You can watch the cartoon here.
• Wind-Up Zarel's line is part of a domination line said by The Soldier from Team Fortress 2. The full line is "Scotland is not a real country! You are an Englishman with a dress!" This is said when a Soldier dominates an enemy Demoman, who is part Scottish.