(even if you aren't vegan)
The Super Cryptogamer Super Show!/EP4
Transcript
{Open: a dingy cell. Crypto is thrown in.}
CG: Hey, thanks for the ride, Mr. Policeman! Man, I seriously thought I could run faster'n he could. {looks around, sees a dingy lookin' guyin jail clothes and a large crack in the floor.} 'Sup dude.
RANDOM CONVICT: Heyya, whater you'se ins forr?
CG: Eh, hacked some craptake of a website. "Clam" something...
POLICEMAN: Mr. Gamére, please come with me. It's time for your phone call.
CG: Oh goody gumdrops! {skips off}
{cut: a grimy room. An equally grimy old man is sitting at a desk, and gives Crypto a look that, if they could kill, would have caused a nuclear explosion. He waves a metal detector over CG, and takes his sunglasses, DS Lite, some money, and the grenade launcher off Crypto's person and stuffs them inside a drawer, which is full of knives. At this sight, Crypto has a flashback. Cut to a wall. In shadow, there are two hands sitting on a table, and another set polishing a large knife.}
VOICE: Heh heh, this is whatcha get for, running off... {cut to the Yates. Vid is sitting on the deck, messing around with a lighter. A ringtone version of Smoke on the Water plays, and Vid sets down the lighter and pulls out a cell phone.}
VID: Yeah, hello? He WHAT? They DID? You WHAT? My god, where're.. Oh. Yeah, I'll get 'em. Wait, plan Tri Omega Omega Tri Lambda Alpha? Daaaaaaamn. {cut: outside of the jail. Everyone but Crypto is here. A large cannon is here as well, manned by Utarefson.}
ZOE: It just has to be my brother that does this crap...
VID: Aw, just ignore it. It's what I do. Now, ready, FIRE! {Utarefson fires the cannon, and a ridiculously fat nerd comes out and hits the wall.}
{KP enters}
KP: Hey guys. Breaking Crypto out?
VID: Yeah. FIRE! So, how about- FIRE!-you?
KP: Trying to inherit the internet.
VID: Oh. G'luck, kid. FIRE!
UTAREFSON: CLICK 5!!!!
VID: What?! Outta ammo?! How the crap are we supposed to find fat nerds aroun- Oh, this'll be good.
{KP looks freaked}
KP: WAIT! LEO JUST GOT OFF HIS DIET TODAY! HE'S THE NEW FATTEST NERD!
VID: Well, where is he?
KP: AT CUPCAKES 'R US! ACROSS TEH STREET!
VID: Jam, get the gato. In the meantime... {Cut to Crypto, sitting in a padded cell.}
CG: Oh, so this is how they treat me, after all we did for them! Well, when I get {the wall cracks open and the room shakes} Yes! Vid came through! {Runs into opening, into a room containing a man in a white suit and black fedora, polishing a shotgun} Well howdy thar stranger.
STRANGER: Hmm... Yes, just call me that. {turns around, to reveal his face is bandaged up (like a mummy) with two holes for his eyes, which are covered by red tinted sunglasses.} You bustin' out?
CG: And what iffin' I is?
STRANGER: Ya need to get out quick. This place is about to be blown to bits.
CG: Alright, sir! I'd best to be gettin' goin!
STRANGER: Wait! These yours? {hands Crypto the items the jailer took, aside from the money.}
CG: Thank yeh, kindly. {blows a hole in the wall with the launcher, and jumps out of the joint. Meanwhile...}
VID: Why ain't Jam back yet? {KP, with crutches, hobbles onscreen.}
KP: You may be my friends, but I can arrest you for Pom Abuse.
{CG lands on KP and bounces off}
CG: Boing! Hey soup guys.
VID: Uh, 'bout sendin' us to the lockup... {points at the crumbling jail}
KP: The jail is a stomach. Squatcha's, to be exact.
SQUATCHA: GET IN MY BELLY!
{A VERY fat Leo walks onscreen.}
LEO: They force fed me! I'm still on a di-
KP: Not anymore!
JAM: {from inside Leo} Chu Chu CHU! (Get me outta here!)
KP: In 'bout....... a year.
L.U.S.C.A.-4: I SHALL ASSIST YOU. {Using its tentacle as a magnet, L.U.S.C.A. pulls Jam out of Leo's throat by his screw.}
ZOE: {0_o}
JAM: Chu Chu Chu Chu. (That... was disgusting.)
LEO: How'd you even get INSIDE me?!
JAM: ...Chu Chu. (My name is Jam for a reason, idiot. You're the suddenly gluttonous catman.)
LEO: Read my line. FORCEFED. FORCEFED.
{Suddenly, the po po show up.}
OFFICER BRIMBLESKI: Keith Pom, you are under arrest for messed-up looking animal abu- What in blazes happened to the damn jail?!
LEO: No, it isn't KP! It's....
{KP reveals to be SKP}'
SKP: Shadow Keith Pom!
SG: You?! How'd YOU get here?!
SKP: Disguise. Duh. Oh, and this is two part!
{end toon}