(even if you aren't vegan)
SSXMails/BHZ/The X 2
WILL BE FORMATTED LATERCoach Z turns on the tv in his room, and lays down in his bed.
Commercial announcer: If you are watching this commercial, you have just won a million dollars! Just enter the following string of numbers on your telephone and talk to an intern for up to 6 hours and 21 minutes!
Coach Z: I've gorttar gert a pern and perper!
Coach Z runs out, and the number (54392) 123-456-789-1011-1213-1415 appears on the bottom of the screen.
Coach Z: Harve any orf you gurys seen my pern and perper?
SSX: No.
Gir: Loser.
Coach Z: Storp fading me!
Coach Z returns to his room. He quickly copies down the phone number on the screen, and runs into another room to a phone. Coach Z punches in the phone number on the paper.
Intern: Hello, welcom to the U.S. Ar-
Coach Z: I'll accerpt irt!
Coach Z hangs the phone up, and runs back into his room.
3 hours later...
Someone arrives at the house. He presses the doorknob, and SSX gets it.
The man at the door: Hello. My name is Mr. GuyWhoPicksPeopleUpToBringThemToBootCamp. Have you seen this man?
Mr. GWPPUTBTTBC shows SSX a picture of Coach Z.
SSX: He's in the health risk zone.
Mr. BootCamp guy: Thank you, sir.
That Mr. guy heads to Coach Z's room. He takes COach Z outside.
Coach Z: Are you the gury who girves me thre mirllion dorrlars?
The person: Ummm.... No.
You-know-who stuffs Coach Z into the back of his truck. Long-name man drives Coach Z to a local boot camp.
Later, at the high-security boot camp place...
Lutennant: Alright, vollunteers! Listen up! You will be going under intense training and even more intense crawling under barbed wire! I wi- Hey, where's that funny-talkin guy?
Coach Z: I'm rigrht herrrrrre!
Lutennant: Why aren't you wearing the U.S. army's boot camp's clothing?
Coach Z: What? U.S. arrrrrmy? Get me ourrta herrre!
COach Z runs as far away as he can from the boot camp, and ends up back at SSX's house.
Meanwhile, at SSX's computer...
SSX: Ok, let's see what I can do here. Gir's new computer's kind of weird when it comes to checking email.
A>Boot_Mail_of_SSX.com
Dear SSX, Didn't you used to have some sort of X thing on your head? Fromly yours, ChocolateMetal
A>Boot_text_entering.exe
A>What? I've always had an X Have you taken a vow of not looking at foreheads? I just spilled invisible paint on it. And yes, invisible paint exists. I also don't use my X as much. But it's still awexome. I'm not exactly sure how many powers it contains. I lost count at 15 million.
Coach Z bursts through the door.
CZ: Nerver say mirllion agairn!
All of a sudden, a huge explosion is heard.
SSX: Well, this is probably the best time to show that I stil have an X.
SSX levitates to the room where the explosion occured. He sees D_R and Teatime lookind around the room.
SSX: What hppened in here?
Teatime: Uhhh.... D_R lit a match, and I burped on it.
D_R: Yeah. No explosves were invloved.
D_R uses her telekenectic powers to cover uo a hole in the wall with a drawer.
Meanwhile, in HoL's storage closet...
Poke_Homsar enters the room, and sits down in front of HoL.
HoL: Hey! get outta here, pudgy! This is my room!
P_H: I'm just a passing trunkset!
HoL: Ugh. I'm not bunking with a stack of white and blue pncakes!
P_H: Woaoaoaoah! I'm more than meets the sky!
Meanwhile, in the garage...
DB walks in to fund his cardboard poses in the trash.
DB: Ummm, Depressio, why are my works of art in the trash?
Depressio: Because they weren't art!
DB: Yeah, welll.... Sadmails aren't art, either!
The trash can smashes into DB's head, and all the poses pour out, along with 4 cans of cool spray.
DB: Thanks, roll of fat!
Meanwhile, at SSX's computer...
SSX walks up to the computer, to find Gir watching on of the many Zim episodes he downloaded.
SSX: Hey, Gir, can I finish my SSXMail up now?
After a short pause, Gr turns the volume up.
SSX(Thinking):Maybe I can prove my X is real on Gir...
A faint shape representing SSX's X begins glowing on SSX's forehead. Gir falls off the chair, and on to the table. SSX gets on, and continues the email.
A> Well, that pretty much answers your question, EdibleSteel. Tune in next time to see Teatme lodge a pen up Coach Z's nose!
The paper comes down.