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RiffText/RTOD/Kirbychu emails.pie/false-mail

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{The screen opens to show Kirbychu's computer room. Only half of the wall is intact, the rest is mainly a wooden frame. Kirbychu enters, carrying a laptop.}

KIRBYCHU HR'D: {sing-songingly} Checkin' my email in a broken room with an old laptop...

LIGHTNING GUY: Oh, now you're in the mood for an intro song.

{Kirbychu sits down at his desk and sets up the laptop, which looks the same as his old one. X On Fire enters.}

X ON FIRE: Kirbychu, what's with this? I thought you were making a new laptop, but this looks just like your old one!

LIGHTNING GUY: It does, doesn't it?

KIRBYCHU HR'D: Well, after I looked over my old laptop again I discovered that the charger was broken, and the laptop's battery was dead. I got a new one of both, and I found that it's screen broke, so I got a spare and fixed it!

X ON FIRE: Oh. I'm leaving now. {exits}

LIGHTNING GUY: I hate when my friends visit just to be an audience surrogate!
NOXIGAR: Oh, now he's in the mood for a legitimate criticism of this fake e-mail.

KIRBYCHU HR'D: That was strange... anyways, let get this show started!

{The computer boots up. Kirbychu opens outlook express}

KIRBYCHU HR'D: Um... what? How could my bank account be expiring?

LIGHTNING GUY: Its time ran out.

I just... wait a minute, that's Zoo's email address! That jerk is trying to steal my money!

{Kirbychu copies the text of the email and pastes it in a new message window. He edits "Dear Kirbychu" to "Mr. Zoo977", fixes "your", replaces "Zoomail.EXE" with "[email protected]" and "The bank" to "Your Credit Union". He then sends the e-mail.}

LIGHTNING GUY: It's clever because it's original.

KIRBYCHU HR'D: That'll teach him to try and scam me out of my money!

{Cut to Zoo's computer. The e-mail pops up on screen. Zoo notices it and sits down.}

ZOO977: What!?! How could my bank account be expiring?

LIGHTNING GUY: ITS FREAKING TIME RAN OUT

I just opened it after my old one was canceled! I'd better call the bank and find out what's going on...

MY THIS IS GOING SLOWLY!

NOXIGAR: MY THIS IS NEVER GOING TO UPDATE