RiffText/Kirbychu emails.pie/Candy

Note: This is the revision of the page from June 29, 2008. Viewer discretion advised.

Summary

A cucumber asks Kirbychu what powers he has. He gets way carried away.

LIGHTNING GUY: Wayyyyyt a minute.

Cast (in order of appearance): Kirbychu, Homestar, Strong Bad, The King of Town, Strong Sad

Places: Kirbychu's Computer Room, The Stick, Homestar's House, The Field, The King of Town's Castle, Strong Bad's Computer Room (easter egg).

Date: February 23, 2008

Transcript

KIRBYCHU HR'D: {opens outlook express} I got my laptop and I'm checkin' my e-mails.

LIGHTNING GUY: You ain't no gangster, Kirbychu. Talk like you got some sense.

Dear K-chu,

What kind of powers do you have?

Sincerely,

Cucumber

KIRBYCHU HR'D: Um, did I just get an e-mail from a vegetable that can't space emails right? That's just not right.

LIGHTNING GUY: Yes, when you said he couldn't space emails right, I got the implication that it wasn't correctly done.

But, oh well. Here are all the powers I have.

{Cut to the stick, Homestar is there. Kirbychu walks in.}

KIRBYCHU HR'D: One power I have is the ability to inhale people like Kirby.

LIGHTNING GUY: Oh, that's why they call you

Homestar, will you assist me?

HOMESTAR: Sure! Wait... WHAT?

{Kirbychu inhales Homestar and spits him out. He flies accross

LIGHTNING GUY: Ack! Cross!

the feild

LIGHTNING GUY: Wierd, man.

and ends up crashing through a wall into his house.}

LIGHTNING GUY: Do we make the assumption that it's his house's wall?

HOMESTAR: Ow, I bruised my face. I think he ate that ten pounds of candy I had with me, too.

KIRBYCHU HR'D: Wait, 10 POUNDS OF CANDY! {He starts to glow.} This won't end well.

{Cut to The Field, Strong Bad is walking by. Kirbychu runs by}

KIRBYCHU HR'D Yuitougdsansxfcvdjfhcmvghv!!! MANDY EAT CANDY!!! SANDY HANDY!!

LIGHTNING GUY: HANDY MANNY

I NEED CANDY!!!

STRONG BAD: What the heck!? Are you okay Kirbychu?

LIGHTNING GUY: No, he's just Kirbychu Kirbychu.

{Kirbychu looks at Strong Bad. He turns into a red lollipop.}

LIGHTNING GUY: Kirbychu turned into a red lollipop? This is becoming surreal!

KIRBYCHU HR'D: RED LOLLIPOP MUST EAT!!!

STRONG BAD: WAIT! I'M NOT A LOLLIPOP,

LIGHTNING GUY: KIRBYCHU'S THE LOLLIPOP! THAT'S WHAT IT SAID AND

I'M STRONG BAD!!

{Strong Bad runs to The KoT's Castle.}

THE KING OF TOWN: What the, what happened?

STRONG SAD: Kirbychu ate to much candy

LIGHTNING GUY: But much candy did not want to be eaten to.

and went nuts. I managed to make an anti-candy to stop him by making candy out of veggies and sweeteners.

LIGHTNING GUY: By "sweeteners", he means drugs.

STRONG BAD: What the, how long have you been here?

STRONG SAD: Oh about 20 minutes.

LIGHTNING GUY: You can't even copy crap right.

STRONG BAD: Whatever, just get Kirbychu to eat the stuff.

{Strong Sad heads to the feild. Kirbychu is running around.}

STRONG SAD: Hey Kirbychu, could you, um, come here for a minute?

KIRBYCHU HR'D: CANDY!?!?

LIGHTNING GUY: Something like that.

{Kirbychu tackles Strong Sad and eats the anti-candy.

LIGHTNING GUY: This is how they sell drugs to children all the time.

He passes out. He wakes up again in his computer room.}

KIRBYCHU HR'D: {typing} Wow, that was crazy. I'm never doing that again.

LIGHTNING GUY: If only it was that simple, you poor, poor addict.

{A Nintendo DS comes down from the top of the screen.

LIGHTNING GUY: Surprise? Where are you?

It has the words "Click Here To E-mail Kirbychu" in purple text on the screen.}

Easter Eggs

Click on the word "never" to see why Strong Bad was in the field.

{Strong Bad is at his computer. There is an e-mail on the screen.}

Dear Strong Bad,

I think you should stand out in the field and see what happens.

LIGHTNING GUY: Spoiler: He gets shot.

Sincerely,

Cucumber

STRONG BAD: If a vegetable with bad spacing wants me to randomly stand in the field and see what happens, they got it! {walks off}

LIGHTNING GUY: This sounds so much like Strong Bad,

Trivia

• This is actually just Kirbychu's email tryout remade.
• Strong Sad's second line (Oh about 20 minutes.) is reference to The Luau, where he responds to Strong Bad in a similar fashion.