Records Of Bell/Records/19

Summary

Bell ventures through Nintendo, Inc. to find Sarah.

Cast: Im a bell, A Rooster, A Kitten, Tracy, Narrator, Mature Bling, Many Goombas, An Armank, A Birdo, Two Knuckle Joes, Many Waddle Dees, A Gordo, Petey Piranha, Tabuu, Sarah, Kirby, Yakuza Boss, Yakuza Minions, Golden Bass, Don Skull

Places: Bling's Living Room, Black Screen of Continuity, Nintendo, Inc. Building

Episode Information: 401-Never Leave Your Power Suit At Home When Battling Game Enemies

Insult: sexually confused dinosaur

Credit Joke: Eric Idle

Transcript

{open to Bling's living room. Bell walks in, and spies a large button labeled "Innuendo Generator"}

IM A BELL:{Nin10D'oh! Mario voice} Oh, I wonder what this is. {presses button}

{a rooster and a kitten appear}

TRACY:{walks in} Hey, dad-{notices the animals} ...What.

{cue theme song, cut to the BSoC}

NARRATOR: Last time on Records of Bell...

{cut to Blings living room. Two cloaked figures are mutilated, the walls are covered in blood, and Mature Bling and Tracy are laying on the ground, severely injured.}

IM A BELL:{in Flightskull suit} What the hell happened here?!

MATURE BLING: Yakuza... Kidnapped Sarah... Nintendo Inc. Building... {falls unconscious}

NARRATOR: And now, the continuation.

IM A BELL: ...Damnitty damn damn dammit. Ah, well. {flies out}

{cut to The Nintendo, Inc. Building. Bell flies in}

IM A BELL: Here it is. My trigger gauge would probably destroy the whole building, so... {retracts trigger gauge, opens the door, revealing many angry Goombas} ...Whatever. {starts killing the Goombas}

{Bell kills the last Goomba, and then, a large shadow engulfs him}

IM A BELL:{looks behind him} HOLY...

{camera swings around to reveal and Armank}

IM A BELL: God, I hate these things! {starts wailing on the Armank's neck, causing it to retract into the body, revealing the green blob-thing inside. Bell starts beating it up, but notices something} What's that? {pulls a large Hammer and a Mega Blaster from the Armank} Sweet! {puts on the blaster, swings the hammer at the blob, destroying the Armank}

NARRATOR: Level complete! Move on to to Stage Two, Lobby of Nintendo!

IM A BELL: ...What-Nevermind. {walks offscreen}

{cut to the lobby. A Birdo is at the receptionist desk}

BIRDO: Hi, do you-

IM A BELL: DIE, YOU SEXUALLY CONFUSED DINOSAUR!!! {Im a bell guns down the Birdo}

NARRATOR: Level complete! Move on to Stage Three, Elevator!

IM A BELL: ...Okay. {walks up to the elevator, it opens, revealing two Knuckle Joes} ...his is too easy. {enters the elevator, smashes the two Joes' heads together}

NARRATOR: Level complete! Move on to Stage Four, Second Floor!

IM A BELL: ...Okay. {presses a button, the door closes. cut to the second floor. The elevator door opens, revealing many Waddle Dees and A single Gordo} Hmm... {spies a rope on the floor} Aha! {grabs rope, makes it into a lasso, catches the Gordo with it, starts swinging it around, smashing into the Waddle Dees with it}

{cut to a few minutes later. Bell has destroyed all the Waddle Dees, and smashes the Gordo into the ground, destroying it}

NARRATOR: Level complete! Move on to Stage Five, Third Floor!

IM A BELL: Say, how many floors are there?

NARRATOR: Five.

IM A BELL: Ah. I see. {enters the elevator}

{cut to the third floor. The elevator door opens. Bell steps out and sees Petey Piranha}

IM A BELL: ...This is TOO easy! Good thing I brought this weed killer! {pulls out a can f weed killer, sprays it on Petey}

{Petey turns brown, and shrivels up}

NARRATOR: Level complete! Move on to Stage Six, Fourth Floor!

IM A BELL: M'kay. {enters elevator}

{cut to the fourth floor. It is dark and purple. Bell exits the elevator}

IM A BELL: Where're the enemies?

{Tabuu appears. A box showing Tabuu's HP, 100, appears on a wall}

IM A BELL: ...Damn. Ah, well. {runs up to Tabuu, is about to strike him}

{Tabuu disappears, and starts randomly warping around the room, until stopping in the far left. Im a bell starts wailing on him with the hammer, leaving Tabuu with 75 HP. Tabuu does that shark-thing move. Bell accidentally jumps in front of it}

IM A BELL: AARGH!!!

{Tabuu warps around the room before stopping in front of Bell. Bell starts blasting him with the Mega Blaster, leaving Tabuu with 50 HP. Tabuu does that giant head with eyebeams move. Bell jumps to the far right to avoid it, and charges his mega blaster. Tabuu waps to the center of the room. Bell runs up to him, and fires the charged mega blaster at point-blank range, leaving Tabuu with 15 HP}

IM A BELL: Hey, what's this on my boot? {looks at bottom of foot, revealing a Big Boss sticker} SWEET! This oughta-

{a trophy stand appears}

IM A BELL: Speak of the devil! {grabs the trophy stand, flings it at Tabuu, turning him into a trophy. Bell grabs it and warps it away} Yatta!

NARRATOR: Level complete! Move on to stage Seven, Top Floor!

{Im a bell enters the elevator. cut to the fifth floor. Bell exits the elevator}

IM A BELL: Now, where's-OH MY GOD.

{camera swing around, to reveal Sarah and Kirby dangling over a vat labrled "Melted English-Language Versions Of Mother 3". The Yakuza boss and two minions are standing behind it. Bell flies up, severs the ropes holding Sarah and Kirby up, sets them down in front of the elevator}

IM A BELL: Get out while you still can.

{Sarah and Kirby enter the elevator}

IM A BELL: Sarah AND Kirby? You guys were trying to get me angry, weren't you?!

YAKUZA BOSS: Yep.

IM A BELL: Why?!

YAKUZA BOSS: Because with your technology, we can make MILLIONS! Now, HAND IT OVER!

IM A BELL: HELL NO! {shoots the minions} Now, we will fight one on one!

YAKUZA BOSS: What about the Flightskull? That's two more people.

IM A BELL: Wha-How did you-

YAKUZA BOSS: We've been watching you for some time now.

IM A BELL: I see. Ah, well. Flightskull, retract! {the Flightskull detaches from Bell, and transforms back into the Golden Bass and Don Skull} Okay, then. Let's fight! Tapeskull mode.

{The golden Bass becomes and MP3 player. It starts playing the Tetris theme}

IM A BELL: Do your worst!

YAKUZA BOSS: Gladly!

{cue montage of Bell and the Yakuza Boss fighting to the Tetruis theme. I'm too lazy to write it. Bell eventually finishes him off}

YAKUZA BOSS: ... Damn... {collapses}

{fade to black. Cue credits