Mystery Fanstuff Theater 3000/Space-Aged Stupidity/eps/4

Summary

Everyone discovers an empty planet, which is also a giant theme park.

Transcript

{Everyone is sleeping. The Spart wakes up, and sits in the captains seat.}

THE SPART: I love it, when everyone is asleep. I get to pretend! {Presses button on chair. A Cup comes up, and pours coffee into it. K-Bot walks in and takes it.}

K-BOT HR'D: {sips coffee} Thanks, Spart.

RYAN-X: {yawn} Hey, K-Bot, can you make me some of that coffee?

K-BOT HR'D: Sure. {K-Bot uses a device in his head to make more coffee.} Milk or cream?

RYAN-X: Cream me.

K-BOT HR'D: {puts cream in the coffee} Here you go.

THE SPART: It's fun imitating the crew while they're asleep. Wait... K-Bot? You're a robot. Do you need to drink?

K-BOT HR'D: Well I don't need to drink, but I'm so advanced in technology that eating and drinking not only won't hurt my system, I can also taste it. It's just a privilege.

THE SPART: Cool. Wait... Look at that! {Looks on Rader.} THEME PARK!!! {Wakes everyone up.}

SEPHIROTH: What?...

THE SPART: There's a theme park planet! Yay! {Drives Ship to the planet.}

SEPHIROTH: Hey! I'm captain!

THE SPART: I know, but you're slow.

CHAOS: I could give him a surgery to replace his muscles with super-fast nano-tronic sensors, increasing his speed almost 10-fold.

SEPHIROTH: No way! Last surgery you gave me made me singing Disney songs for a week!

K-BOT HR'D: Actually, I did that. {blushes}

CHAOS: THOSE SONGS WERE COOL!

SEPHIROTH: In fact, it still happens... {BZZT!} {Singing.} Be our guest! Be our guest!
Put our service to the test
Tie your napkin 'round your neck, cherie
And we'll provide the rest
Soup du jour
Hot hors d'oeuvres
Why, we only live to serve
Try the grey stuff
It's delicious! {BZZT!} Ohh...

CHAOS: So, K-Bot, ready for your tune up? {lifts up a stun gun and a laser rifle}

SEPHIROTH: {Singing again.} When you wish upon a star, it doesn't matter who you are....

K-BOT HR'D: {hides behind GR-01} No, but GR-01 is! {runs off}

GR-01: {to Chaos} Threat: Try it, and I'll use your bones for ammo.

SEPHIROTH: {Singing.} HEIGH HO! HEIGH HO! OFF TO WORK WE GO!!! {Chases K-Bot with a Pickaxe.}

{K-Bot bumps into Joseph, who throws him to Chaos. Chaos pulls out a screwdriver and opens up a panel in K-Bot, then hooks up the weapons and closes the panel.}

SEPHIROTH: {Singing} You'll bring honour to us all!!

K-BOT HR'D: Oh! That upgrade! Thanks!

SEPHIROTH: {Normal now.} Okay, Let's go to the planet now. I WANT EXCITEMENT DANGIT!

{MEANWHILE ON THE THEME PARK PLANET...}

{A robot is wandering through the planet with cotton candy in his hand.}

B-621: Ah, what a wonderful day here... I'm so glad I live here! {A door in his chest opens and he puts the cotton candy in. Various sounds are heard from inside the small door.} Mmm... cotton candy...

{B-621 sees the LeviathanX approaching the planet.}

B-621: What the...?

{Cut back. Everyone comes in, to see it's empty.}

SEPHIROTH: Whoa.. Ghost town. {Sees a piece of paper nailed to the door. He reads it.} "To anyone who is reading this: This park is abandoned. You can have it. I am done with it. -????" Cool! We own the planet!

USERUNKNOWN:I think that there is some thing here not of earthly origin.

SEPHIROTH: Hmm... You don't say...

USERUNKNOWN:So, who are you gonna call?

SUPERDUDE:My mom.

USERUNKOWN: No! Ghostbusters!

SEPHIROTH: The Ghostbusters are dead. The were ripped apart by Earth's Explosion, and their remains burnt. A few people on Earth Survived, and I can tell you the Tom Cruise, or the People from High School Musical weren't them. They died too.

USERUNKNOWN:Good.I hate those people.

K-BOT HR'D: I wonder if the machines still work? {turns on a cotton candy machine and makes everyone cotton candy} Cotton candy works! {gives everyone cotton candy}

USERUNKNOWN:Good.Don't eat it yet, you should make sure it is safe to eat first.Me and Superdude found some weird readings on our radar, we're going to go check it out.{Gets in the laser gun turrent of a hover craft and Superdude drives it away}

GR-01: Statement: This cotton candy is useless since I have no eating apparatus.

GIM2: You're lucky. This stuff tastes bad anyway.

{GIM2 opens a little compartment in his head and puts some cotton candy in his head. After he does so, his eyes start to flash colours.}

GIM2: {slightly panicky} Uh oh, my memory banks failed to warn me that sugar makes my system malfunction.

{GIM2's eyes turn yellow.}

GIM2: {C3PO's voice} Uh oh! We're in danger! Artoo, fix me, FIX ME!!!

{GIM2 dances around in a panic.}

GR-01: {facepalms} Statement: Oh boy.

{B-621 is spying from far away.}

B-621: Who are they? Well whoever they are, they are trespassing in my home and eating my cotton candy! Two options are available. Option one: I talk to the newcomers and inform them that they are trespassing. Option two: I activate battle mode and destroy them all.

{Small pause}

B-621: Option two selected. {Hands turn into blasters. Rocket thrusters come out of the bottom of his feet. Flies up and flies toward them at an incredible speed.}

K-BOT HR'D: Uh guys, ENEMY AT 3 O'CLOCK! BATTLE MODE ACTIVATE! {goes through same transformation as B-621}

GIM2: Oh no! Don't destroy it! It might be {voice goes deeper} advanced... {normal voice} Ugh, I hate it when that happens.

{GR-01 shoots B-621 with a electric pulse gun which disables him and B-621 falls down onto the ground deactivated.}

GR-01: Statement: All too easy. {blows over the top of the pulse gun}

SEPHIROTH: Actually, you are trespassing in OUR property. We own this place now. Now, for redesigning! {Gets out a toolkit, and goes to a random ride to redesign. An hour later, it is done, and it's a ride saying Sephiroth City.}

{Userunkown voice comes on over the radio}

USERUNKNOWN:Get over here quick!You have to see this thing!

{Everybody except for Chaos, who is fixing a random Merry-Go-Round goes over to Userunknown. You can see Chaos working in the background.}

USERUNKNOWN:Shhh.Look.{Points at a huge army of robots}

K-BOT HR'D: I just built that. It's a ride called "robot invasion".

USERUNKNOWN:No, the robot army behind that one.

{Cut to a bunch of HK-47s.Cut back}

K-BOT HR'D: Reinforcements?

USERUNKNOWN:What?

KIRBYCHU HR'D: Never mind. KILL THEM!

{The Robots Explode, after Sephiroth's Turret Cars shoot them.}

{A 10000000 more apper out of nowhere and explode when Userunknown and Superdude shoot them all}

USERUNKNOWN:{Shooting robots}Where are they coming from?!?!

{Cut to a little room where a middle-aged man is pressing random buttons.}

MAN: Hee hee hee hee hee hee hee!

{Cut back.}

{Userunknown is watching the episode on a laptop}

USERUNKNOWN:We need to find a little room where a middle-aged man is pressing random buttons and going "Hee hee hee hee hee hee hee!".

{Zoom out, to see that Userunknown is in the same place as before.}

SEPHIROTH: There is no middle aged man. In fact, that was only a robot. I looked at it, to find out that is part of the restraunt animatron robots. The reason why you think it's an army, is an illusion.

USERUNKNOWN:Weird... {ooc:Whats the plot and when does it end?}

{OOC: They find an Abandoned Fairground, and they redesign it. It ends later.}

SUPERDUDE:Hey!Look!A shooting gallery!

{Userunknown and Superdude shoot stuff at the shooting gallery}

{GIM2 walks over dazedly to a giant roller-coaster.}

GIM2: This seems to be a giant roller-coaster. It seems to be broken in several places. {sighs} If only my programming was NOT to fix everything I come near.

{Cut back to after the last episode where GR-01 is lying face down with the bit where all the toast was coming out of blocked with a giant shield of wood. Cut back.}

GIM2: I should get started.

{Cut to a montage of GIM2 fixing the roller-coaster with some of the other S-AS characters popping up in places and annoying him. When done, the roller-coaster is gleaming with a smooth metal frame with smooth metal tracks, looking like one of the best roller-coasters ever made.}

GIM2: Wow. If only I could do something like that when I'm inactive! Who wants first ride?

{Userunknown puts a bomb in the roller coasters first seat and turns the roller coaster on}

USERUNKNOWN:Always wanted to do that!

{GIM2's eyes turn red and a laser voips from them and pummels the bomb out of the seat into space. Afterwards, GIM2's eyes go back to normal.}

GIM2: If you could please not do something like that again.

{GR-01 hops into a seat, followed by Sephiroth, Ryan-X and some other guy.}

GR-01: {to the other three} Condescending Query: I hope you didn't eat before going onto the ride?

SEPHIROTH: I did, but I puked already, so I'm alright.

RYAN-X: I'm good.

CHAOS: Hey. Does anyone want to test my new ride?

{Cut to a merry-go-round, rigged with razor blades, flamethrowers, glass jars, and exploding carousel horses.}

CHAOS: It's safe, I Swear!

K-BOT HR'D: I'll try! {goes on the ride and comes back in 12 separate pieces} DON'T GO ON THAT DEATHTRAP!

{Chas sweeps Kirbychu's 12 parts offscreen.}

CHAOS: Oh, that was just a joke me and K-Bot made. So, go on it. NOW.

K-BOT HR'D: {whispering to Chaos} I'll force them on the ride if you fix me and give me $30.

CHAOS: $20.

USERUNKNOWN:$25.Wait... what are you talking about?

{Sephiroth comes in.}

SEPHIROTH: Ooh! New ride! {Gets on Chaos' Ride. Cut back to Chaos, Userunknown, and K-Bot. They get splattered with red liquid. Sephiroth comes back in, all red.} IT BURST MY KETCHUP PACKETS!!! {Takes shirt off, and twists it, getting the ketchup out. He puts it back on.} Still, a good ride Chaos.

K-BOT HR'D: I'll take the 20 if you throw in a burger and a large fries.

GR-01: Statement: I don't know why, but I'm going on.

{GR-01 goes on Chaos' ride and later comes back a wreck.}

GR-01: Statement: That must've been the best ride ever! Though I think it'd be better used as a weapon of mass destruction.

{GIM2 walks over to where GR-01 is and starts repairing him.}

{Sephiroth comes back in, and picks up a leg.}

SEPHIROTH: That's where my leg was! .....Oh crap. {Falls over.}

CHAOS: There's always Human Pinball to try.

{Cut to little kids going into a machine. When the come out, they are completely round and are used in a game of pinball, being sliced in half by the stoppers and getting electrocuted when the hit things.}

CHAOS: It's a ball of laughs. Mostly pains, but you can laugh if you don't get your vocal chords sliced in half.

SEPHIROTH: Those Poor Alien Children!

CHAOS: Actually, they were paid actors.

SEPHIROTH: Midget actors?

CHAOS: No. They were all kids. Just actors.

SEPHIROTH: Oh. Well, they're dead now, so you could probably use their organs for your "Project".

CHAOS: Pfft. I can only used well-aged organs for that. I'll harvest these ones and sell them on the Black Market.

SEPHIROTH: Oh. What is this "Project" for, anyway?

CHAOS: Making a new chain of fast food resteraunts! If McDonalds made it big with just human Flesh, think of how much money Organs could rack in when you grind them into a delicious burger?

{Flashforward! Cut to Chaos, on a high platform, dressed as a dictator, surrounded by fire. His minions are front of him as a giant army. Chaos laughs evilly, and takes a bite from an Organ Burger. Cut back.}

SEPHIROTH: Cool.

RYAN-X: {rides Chaos' deathtrap, comes back a little banged up} Wow...that was fun...WAH! WHAT HAPPENED TO MY LEGS?!

SEPHIROTH: Excuse me? I recall you having legs. Unless I was drunk every previous time I saw you.

CHAOS: I'm a little hammered myself every day.

RYAN-X: Wow...I got so smashed I couldn't think straight...

SEPHIROTH: Well... there's nothing much to stay here for.

{End 'Sode.}