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Gilligan 'n' Tracy/Ep10.

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Okay, before this starts I want to say something... this episode... IS INTERACTIVE!!! But remember, no stupid randomness. Got it? Okay... NOW LETS BEGIN!!!


THE EPISODE

{Open to a giant theater. A red carpet is spread out and a lot of people are arriving and walking down the carpet while crowds watch and cheer}

TV ANCHOR: Hello, my name is TV Anchor, and we're here LIVE at the Gilligan and Tracy 10th episode spectacular! Before we go in, lets talk to some of the guests!

{Cut to TV Anchor and Chwoka}

CHWOKA: Well, how did I get here?

TV ANCHOR: I... don't know... well, anything you like to say in honor of the tenth episode?

CHWOKA: What? How? Why?

TV ANCHOR: ...Errr... kay, lets just move on...

{Cut to TV anchor and Vindicator}

VINDICATOR: {obviously drunk, holding whiskey bottle} Voooooooodooooooooo!

TV ANCHOR: god what is wrong with you peo- GASP! IT LOOKS LIKE OUR GUESTS OF HONOR HAVE ARRIVED!

{A limo pulls up. The driver gets out and walks to the car door of the limo. He opens it. Gilligan an Tracy step out. The crowd cheers}

LEMON: Boooooooo!

TRACY: ... {calmly walks up to Lemon, smacks him, walks back over to Gilligan}

GILLIGAN: {Whispers to Tracy} Hey, watch this... {Shouts} HEY, EVERYBODY! I LOVE YOU ALL!!!

{Everybody goes crazy}

LEMON: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

TRACY:{to Gilligan} If you think that's funny, then watch this! {takes off shirt, throws it into the crowd, who cheers more}

{the shirt lands on Lemon}

GILLIGAN: Hey! Take a look at this!

{The screen goes black. The words, "CENSORED, LADIES!" appear. Cut back}

TRACY: ...Man, that's just going too far.

GILLIGAN: Say what you like, but I felt FREE.

TRACY: ...Whatever you say...

LEMON: Hey pencil can I eat your shirt?

TRACY: ...Five, four, three, two, one.

{a large amount of the crowd attacks Lemon, trying to get the shirt}

LEMON: OH HA HA HA CROWD {throws some fire at the crowd and makes a barrier around him. He gets the shirt, puts pickles on it, and eats it}

TRACY: ...I-Wh-Hmm-Y-Why did you just eat my shirt? That I've been WEARING?

GILLIGAN: Yeah, um... could you please put on another shirt?

LEMON: I ate all of them. {burps}

GILLIGAN: THE AUTHOR SAID NO STUPID RANDOMNESS

LEMON: HEY GILLIGAN WHERE DID YOUR PUNCTUATION GO

RAIKU: Hey Bell, Hey Gilligan. {He lights his hands, and smokes some pot.} Want some?

TRACY: No thanks, I got my own. {takes out some pot, lights it, pulls out a bottle of vodka, drinks some. The vodka explodes when it spills on the pot, causing Tracy to explode. A Tracy clone appears} ...Well, THAT was stupid.

ZORAX: {floats in. his eyes are covered by a blind fold. He's holding a bag of fur} Hey, albino! I go the fur!

GILLIGAN: ...Tracy, for the love of god, put on a shirt.

TRACY: ...Why should I?

GILLIGAN: Cause it disturbs me. And, since you're not wearing a shirt and standing right next to me, hourdes of yaoi fangirls will start writing GilliganxTracy fanfiction.

TRACY: ...There'll likely be more Tracy/Lemon fics, considering I threw my shirt on him earlier.

GILLIGAN: ...Just put on a damn shirt.

TRACY: Okay, okay. {takes off trenchcoat, warps up a shirt, puts it on, puts trenchcoat back on} Jesus, if there's gonna be and Gilligan/Tracy slash, it's your fault.

GILLIGAN: Whaaaaaaaaaaaa!?

TRACY: You're the one that flashed your {bleep} on camera.

GILLIGAN: ...Okay, you have a point.

TRACY: Right. So, um... What now?

GILLIGAN: I guess we just walk in.

TRACY: Okay.

{cut to later, on the stage. Spotlights shine everywhere}

VOICE: And now, for our hosts, our guests of honor, the duo who started it all... GILLIGAN AND TRACY!!!

{pause five seconds}

AUDIENCE MEMBER: WELL, WHERE ARE THEY?

{Cut to the dressing room. Gilligan and Tracy are playing the Haruhi wii game}

TRACY: THIS GAME IS AWESOME

GILLIGAN: I KNOW. NOW MOVE THOSE ARMS.

TRACY: HEY, WHEN ARE WE SUPPOSED TO GO ONSTAGE?

GILLIGAN: Right now. Why do you ask?

TRACY: ...GILLIGAN, YOU IDIOT!

GILLIGAN: You don't have to get all mean! {Muttering} Asshole...

TRACY:{puts coat back on, opens the door} RUN DAMMIT

{Cut to the stage. Gilligan and Tracy run on, panting. Tracy trips on something and slides into the podium}

GILLIGAN: Hey, I'm Gilligan! And that guys Tracy! But you know our names!

{Pause for a laugh. It doesn't come}

TRACY:{gets up} LAUGH FOOLS

{forced laughter from the audience}

GILLIGAN: Anyway, we have some great stuff planned tonight! ...Well, we DID, but we didn't think you guys really deserved to be eaten by Komodo dragons.

{cut to two Komodo dragons in the audience}

KOMODO DRAGON 1:{stands up} Hey! I find that offensive!

KOMODO DRAGON 2:{grabs Komodo dragon 1's shoulder} Calm down, Steve. Fighting won't solve anything.

KOMODO DRAGON 1:{sighs, sits back down} I guess you're right, Paul.

GILLIGAN: Now, lets start off with... THE TOP TEN G&T MOMENTS! Picked by you, our fans!

TRACY: Er... You have the tape, right?

GILLIGAN: Yep. PLAY THE DAMN THING.

{A giant screen rolls down. Static appears, then an image appears... but not of the top ten list. Instead we see Gilligan and Tracy. Gilligan is offscreen adjusting a camera. He then runs onscreen and stands next to Tracy}

GILLIGAN: I'm telling you, man! This is gonna get us big on Youtube!

TRACY: I know, man! Now, you got the whip ready?

GILLIGAN: Right he-

{cut via static to some field}

TRACY: Now, where can we find a sheep...

{More static. Cut to what looks like the star of david painted on the ground. A dead sheep is in the middle}

GILLIGAN: LET THE SACRIFICING BEG-

{Static. Screen goes black}

TRACY: ... {slaps Gilligan}

GILLIGAN: ...I guess I got the wrong ta-

TRACY: WELL PUT IN THE RIGHT ONE

GILLIGAN: Okay, okay! NEXT TAPE

{An image appears on the screen... once again, not of the list, but Gilligan and Tracy watching... the golden girls.}

BLANCHE: I just met the most sophisticated man in the world!

ROSE:{gasps} You know George "Goober" Lindsey?!

GILLIGAN: {Laughs} Oh, Rose...

{Static. Screen goes black}

TRACY: NEXT

{An image appears on the screen. This time, it really is the Top Ten List.}

NUMBER 10

{The clip from episode 7 where Gilligan dies plays. Cut backs. Screen goes black}

GILLIGAN: ...Really? One of your favorite moments is me DYING!?

TRACY: You seem to have confused the terms "fans" and "viewers", Gilligan.

GILLIGAN: ...Well, damn. Isn't that a little... dark?

TRACY: It was only the tenth...

GILLIGAN: Okay, next one then.

NUMBER 9

{A clip from episode 9 plays, showing Hell Cerburus getting stabbed by Damien. Cut back. Screen goes black}

TRACY: ...Neat.

GILLIGAN: ...Lets just take a little break from the list for now.

TRACY: ...Okay.

GILLIGAN: For now, we'd like to introduce you to a new series of... GILLIGAN AND TRACY PRODUCTS!

TRACY: ...Wait, those haven't been tes-

{Gilligan pushes Tracy out of the way, ignoring him}

GILLIGAN: Thats right! Now you can enjoy the many products based off of your favorite show!

TRACY: There are still major flaw-

{Gilligan pulls out a wii game}

GILLIGAN: Lets start with Gilligan and Tracy: THE GAME.

TRACY: Didn't we accidentally program a trojan horse into-

GILLIGAN: THIS WILL BE THE MOST EXCITING WII EXPERIENCE YOU HAVE EVER HAD

TRACY: We haven't even finished the first leve-

GILLIGAN: LETS MOVE ON TO... {Pulls out a... manga? What?} THE GILLIGAN AND TRACY MANGA!!! WRITTEN BY PEOPLE! ...IN JAPAN!

TRACY: That hasn't been transl-

GILLIGAN: COMING SOON! NOW FOR... THE GILLIGAN AND TRACY SUPER-DUPER ACTION FIGURES. {Pulls out Gilligan and Tracy action figures}

TRACY: But those have lead paint on th-

GILLIGAN: MOVE THEIR ARMS ALL OVER THE PLACE AND MAKE THEM DO WHATEVER YOU WANT!

TRACY: There's not that much poseabili-

GILLIGAN: WELL THAT END OUR LINE OF PRODUCTS.

TRACY: They won't be out for a few mo-

GILLIGAN: THEY'LL BE OUT NEXT WEEK NOW ON TO THE LIST

NUMBER 8

{A clip from episode 2 plays. It is the ending, where Gilligan's head is bleeding badly}

TRACY: ...Primus, people hate us.

GILLIGAN: M-maybe the next clip will be better...

NUMBER 7

{A clip never before seen plays. Tracy is randomly shot in the stomach}

GILLIGAN: Oh, COME ON! That never even happened!

TRACY:{stomach is bleeding} I-it just did... N-next clip, please?

GILLIGAN: Dude, do you need a doctor or something?

TRACY: N-no, I think I can wait until the end of the episode...

NUMBER 6

{Another clip from episode 2 plays. Its the part where Gilligan is hit in the head with a bat}

GILLIGAN: What is WRONG with you people!?

TRACY: D-do we even have any fans?!

{Rick is watching an episode, laughing.}

GILLIGAN: Well, thats good enough. Do we have any more?

{Crickets}

GILLIGAN: Lets... just move on.

{Kirbychu enters, apparently unaware of what's happening.}

KIRBYCHU HR'D: Hey, this isn't Harry Potter! {sees Gilligan} Oh, hey Badstar, what's going on, and why are you dressed like that? And Im A Bell, {looks at Tracy} when did your bell shrink?(pretend the two don't know I'm friends with their fathers)

{Raiku facepalms.}

GILLIGAN: Ummm... you must be confused. I'm his son...

KIRBYCHU HR'D: He had a son? Why didn't I find out about this? I've been his friend for who knows how long.

TRACY: And I'm Bell's son.

KIRBYCHU HR'D: ...WHAT IS IT WITH MY FRIENDS NOT TELLING ME THESE THINGS!?!

TRACY: ... I'm sure I've met you before...

KIRBYCHU HR'D: Must've been at one of Bell's parties or something. I probably thought you were his nephew or something...

TRACY: Yes, that's it. ...But I remember him telling you "This is my son, Tracy".

KIRBYCHU HR'D: I was probably either over-caffeinated or just not listening.

TRACY: Whatever.

{Sephiroth comes from the side of the screen.}

SEPHIROTH: Hey Gilligan. Hey Tracy. Hey Pikaby!

KIRBYCHU HR'D: ...Kirbychu, Sephiroth. My name is Kirbychu.

GILLIGAN: ...Lets just conti- {Phone ring} ...Hold on. {Pulls out cell phone. Opens. Puts to ear} Hello? ...Yeah. ...Japan? Why would we go to japa- ... {Eye twitch. Slowly hangs up} ...

TRACY: ... {pulls out earmuffs, puts them on his head} ...What is it?

GILLIGAN: ... HARUHI SEASON TWOOOOOOOOO

TRACY: ...Jesus, it took them over seven hundred years to make a second season?

{OOC: FYI, Gilligan 'n' Tracy takes place in 2799.}

GILLIGAN: WE MUST GO TO JAPAN

TRACY: ...Shouldn't all the original voice actors be long dead by now?

GILLIGAN: ...Uh... they're immortal? Anyway, we gotta end this in 15 minutes somehow! Quick! On with the list!

NUMBER 5'

{An image appears on the screen. It is a disturbingly detailed close-up of Tracy}

TRACY: ...Wh-

GILLIGAN: Dude, you gotta trim those nose hairs...

TRACY: I DON'T HAVE A NOSE!

GILLIGAN: ...Oh. ...What the {bleep} is this anyway?

TRACY: ..I don't know. At least nothing bad's hap-

{the detailed Tracy's eyes start to swell up and turn red. They explode}

TRACY: ...Eh-

{the detailed Tracy's mouth opens, and blood starts pouring out of it}

GILLIGAN: NEXT CLIP NEXT CLIP. DID THAT EVER EVEN HAPPEN!?

TRACY: I DON'T KNOW!

NUMBER 4

{The screen cuts back to the disturbingly detailed Tracy, still with no eyes and blood pouring out of it's mouth}

TRACY: WHAT THE HELL?!

GILLIGAN: TIME FOR ANOTHER BREAK

TRACY: Okay. {pulls out a small remote contol. He aims it at the screen and presses a button} ... Er... {presses the button a few more times} It's not turning off!

GILLIGAN: Jesus, NO

{the image on the screen zooms out to reveal an apocalyptic wasteland. There are destroyed and burning houses everywhere}

TRACY: WHAT IS GOING ON?!

GILLIGAN: I DON'T KNOW!

{cracks start forming on the screen}

TRACY: AAH!

GILLIGAN: {Grabs remote out of Tracy's hand and throws it at the screen, destroying it} ...Well, thats the end of the list, I suppose.

{the screen falls to the floor, to reveal a world similar to what was last shown on the screen}

TRACY: WHA?!

{the detailed Tracy falls to the ground, now the size of a normal human}

GILLIGAN: ...The {bleep}!?

{reddish clouds start floating out of where the portal}

TRACY:{grabs Gilligan by the collar} RUN!

{Cut to a wall outside the theater. Part of it exlpodes, creating a large hole. Gilligan and Tracy jump through the explosion, rolling on the ground as they land. They quickly stand up}

GILLIGAN: ...Dude, that was epic! Lets do that again!

{lightning shoots out from the hole in the wall and strikes right beside Gilligan}

TRACY: ...Holy {bleep}.

{a shadowy figure riding a shadowy horse rides out of the hole}

GILLIGAN: {Jumps back, almost falling} Who the hell are you!? ...{Eyes squint} ...no. {Eyes widen} No... IT CAN'T BE!

FIGURE:{deep voice} You're right. It can't.

{a larger shadowy figure riding a flaming horse skeleton rides out of the hole}

GILLIGAN: ...WHAT THE {bleep} IS GOING ON!?

LARGER FIGURE: Honestly, I have no idea.

GILLIGAN: ...Tracy, do you have ANY theory at all to whats happening!?

TRACY: Well, all I can think of is that Damien's reinvading Earth.

LARGER FIGURE: You're half-right. I am Damien, but I'm not invading Earth again. Something's happening. Our shadow horses aren't listening to us, and are basically dragging us out of our current lair, an alternate Earth we've conquered. It seems the two worlds are melting together somehow.

GILLIGAN: Well, I can only come up with one way to solve this problem. We must... {sigh} do an extremely cliche hero/villain team-up...

DAMIEN: I suppose you're right. Now, we should get started before-

{the theatre implodes into a larger hole leading to the wasteland Earth}

DAMIEN: ...Before the hole gets any bigger. {sighs}

GILLIGAN: The only solution I can think of is destroying this alternate earth...

DAMIEN: ...I suppose so. Hopefully we can do it before it completely fuses with this Earth.

GILLIGAN: Well... time for a HIGH BUDGET ACTION SEQUENCE

{HIGH BUDGET ACTION SEQUENCE}

TRACY: That was definitely high budget and not at all made with any of the following; Cardboard cutouts, puppets, Men in rubber suits, or cardboard cutouts of puppets made to look like men in rubber suits.

GILLIGAN: Yep, we totally just saved the world and didn't spend an hour and a half playing Megaman 9.

TRACY: Should we end the episode now, Gilligan?

GILLIGAN: Hmmm... lets show the number one moment first. {Sigh} We pretty much know whats gonna happen though...

NUMBER ONE

{The clip is not a clip from the show... but a clip from... The Golden Girls?}

DELIVERY MAN: Oh and by the way, theres some crazy old lasy running through the sprinkler naked on your lawn.

DOROTHY: Oh, sir, you must be mista- {Looks out the window} MA!!!

TRACY: ...Well, that's not at all what I expected.

GILLIGAN: ...This-...this... THIS WAS THE WORST SEASON FINALE EVER!

TRACY: Well, at least it's over, right?

GILLIGAN: {Sigh} Right... well, lets end this... now, go away you people who call yourselves "fans"! You make me sick...

TRACY: Well, until next time, eh-OH WAIT WE DID PLAY MEGAMAN 9 FOR AN HOUR AND A HALF AND FORGOT TO CLOSE THE PORTAL DIDN'T WE-

{everything explodes into flames and disintegrates, leaving behind nothing but a barren wasteland. Cut to a view of Earth from space. It now has the appearance of two partially-combined planets, one a barren wasteland, and the other a reddish Earth-like planet. The two planets completely combine and become a sun-like planetoid with pillars of flames shooting out of random points on its surface. one pillar strikes the camera. Cut to static}

ITS OVER