Con email.wue/129

Summary

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Transcript

{Open to Conchris' Computer room, Chrionroar flies in through the window and lands on the floor, the computer is already displaying this email:}

O HAY

You know what would be a hoot? Letting
Chrio... Chr... that funny guy do the
email.

Irregardless,
Skully

{Chrionroar gets up and reads the email}

CHRIONROAR: I shall pursue this quest! Onwards!

{Chrionroar throws himself at the wall, Conchris opens the door and looks at Chrionroar}

CONCHRIS: Uhh... what are you doing?

CHRIONROAR: Wallfacing!

{Pause}

CONCHRIS: How... nice... uh... I need to check the email now, I've just regained control of it again.

{Chrionroar grabs Conchris by the collar whilst holding up a fork}

CHRIONROAR: THOU SHALT NOT PASS!

CONCHRIS: Wait, what?

{Chrionroar throws Conchris to the floor}

CONCHRIS: Dude, what are you doing?

CHRIONROAR: I'm in your base, stealin' your mailz!

CONCHRIS: Oh no... Don't tell me someone emailed to ask if someone else could gain control over the email show for this email...

CHRIONROAR: Yep!

CONCHRIS: I think I should be going now...

{Chrionroar grabs Conchris and pins him up on the wall by using a fork}

CONCHRIS: Okay, not cool. Let me down now.

CHRIONROAR: NO!

CONCHRIS: Let me down.

CHRIONROAR: Can't hear you! {typing} I has the emailz answered Buggy with Skull! I'll find the lost hoots of Atlantis!

CONCHRIS: Oh Bob, he's using a different perspective for an email... {close up} I LIKE IT!

{Zoom out to reveal the room is a mess and Chrionroar is gone}

CONCHRIS: Great. Now I'm going to be hanging here for the rest of this email.

{Cut to the docks, Chrionroar is conversing with a sailor}

CHRIONROAR: I CAN HAS SHIP?!

SAILOR: For the last time, no!

{Chrionroar sails away with the ship}

SAILOR: I should really start paying attention more.

{Cut to the sea, Chrionroar is wearing a pirate's hat}

CHRIONROAR: Where shall we sail to Captain Stop Post?!

{The Stop Sign doesn't reply}

CHRIONROAR: Good idea!

{The ship starts sailing towards a random direction, half-way to Atlantis, Chrionroar suddenly bursts into the captain quarters}

CHRIONROAR: I'm so sorry! But my fellow sailors wanted me to kill you! {grabs the stop sign} So sorry, captain! {eats the stop sign, pause} Wait, then that means I'M THE CAPTAIN! YIPPEE! {jumps into the captain's seat and puts on the captain's hat}

{Timeswipe, Chrionroar now has a beard, he loses it when the boat suddenly shudders}

CHRIONROAR: OH BOY! VISITORS!

{Cut to the deck, Chrionroar bursts in through the door}

CHRIONROAR: WECLOME VISITARS TO MY BOAT!

PIRATE #1: Yargh! We've come to steal steal yer treasure!

CHRIONROAR: Huh?

PIRATE #4: You know, treasure? The shiny kind?

CHRIONROAR: {picks up a spoon with a face drawn on it} TAKE MR. SPOON!

{A pirate wearing a captain's hat jumps on board}

PIRATE CAPTAIN: Shiver me timbers! We got an idiot on a ship! Get him!

{The pirates chase after Chrionroar}

CHRIONROAR: I'm not the one you wants! {throws the spoon} TAKE HIM INSTEAD!

{The spoon flies at one of the pirates and hits him in the eye}

PIRATE #6: ARGH MY EYE! {falls overboard} WARGH! {a shark eats him}

CHRIONROAR: Sounds safe enough! Alley-oop! {jumps overboard with diving gear on}

{The pirates stop}

PIRATE CAPTAIN: Why are we stopping? He's only dived in!

PIRATE #1: But he's out of our F.o.V! We can't get him!

PIRATE CAPTAIN: Well, let's just wait here until he comes back, okay?

{Cut back to Conchris' House}

FOREST: Where is the idiot? Things have been awfully quiet in this house for the past 3.4 hours.

CRUROAR: Yeah... this place does seem a bit quiet.

CIEEIA: Wait... do you hear something?

{Conchris' cries for help slowly gets louder}

CONCHRIS: {muffled} SOMEBODY HELP ME!

FOREST: I think it's time to take this opportunity to do something. {runs up to the computer room}

{Cut to the computer room, Forest kicks the door down}

FOREST: Where are you?

CONCHRIS: Behind you.

{Forest turns around}

FOREST: Wow. What day is it? The hanging out to dry day?

CONCHRIS: Let me down.

FOREST: Not unless you admit to being the biggest idiot on Earth.

CONCHRIS: But I'm not! Chrionroar is!

FOREST: Admit it!

CONCHRIS: {sighs, he says it in a sarcastic way} I'm the biggest idiot on Earth. Now let me go!

{Forest pulls the fork out and Conchris drops to the floor}

CONCHRIS: Thanks.

FOREST: Now, what the heck happened here?

CONCHRIS: Well, Chrionroar broke into here and pinned me up on this wall. He's looking for the lost hoots of Atlantis or something...

FOREST: You've got to be kidding me!

CONCHRIS: Well, I think he's already left the docks at the speed he was going. So there's no way we can borrow a boat from there...

{Cut to the sea, Conchris and Forest are on jet Skis}

CONCHRIS: I can't believe you threatened them at gun point to give us these.

FOREST: I have ways of making them talk. Also, there's a ship up ahead.

{Conchris and Forest close in on the stolen ship, they jump aboard}

CONCHRIS: G.A.S.P! Pirates!

{Cut to another part of the boat, several pirates stand with their weapons drawn}

PIRATE #1: YARGH! And stuff.

FOREST: This is ridiculous! Pirates don't exist anymore! What is wrong with this email show?

PIRATE #3: Your mom is what's wrong.

FOREST: I don't have a mom... You make me sad.

CONCHRIS: Nobody makes robots sad except for me! HI-YAH! {kicks one of the pirates overboard}

PIRATE CAPTAIN: He's crossed the aggro line! Get him!

{The pirates gang up on Conchris, they hit him for 20 a turn}

CONCHRIS: Uh... was it supposed to hurt? {kicks all the pirates surrounding him overboard}

PIRATE CAPTAIN: Oh crap! {Conchris is about to kick him} No, no. Let me handle this. {kicks himself overboard} WAAAAGH!

{Chrionroar jumps onto the scene}

CHRIONROAR: I'M BACKZORS TO THE HACKZORS!

CONCHRIS: {grabs Chrionroar by the collar} Okay! Now start talking! What did you do?

CHRIONROAR: Well, let's see... I had breakfast, ate a truck, blew up a building...

{Timeswipe, the daytime is now nighttime and Conchris is sleepy}

CHRIONROAR: ...killed a man, stole a boat... and found the lost hoots of Atlantis! {pulls out an Owl statue, it wakes up and starts hooting}

CONCHRIS: Whassa.... {wakes up from his sleepy trance} Wha? Were those things cut?

CHRIONROAR: {eats the night sky, revealing day light} Yes!

CONCHRIS: Let's go back to shore...

{Cut to the docks, Cruroar and Cieeia are waiting there}

CIEEIA: Conchris! Chrionroar! You're back!

CONCHRIS: We weren't gone long.

CHRIONROAR: I FOUNDS TEH LOST HOOTS OF ATLANTIS! {pulls out the Owl statue from earlier, it wakes up and starts hooting}

CRUROAR: Where's Forest?

CONCHRIS: Oh, she's at the bar, drinking her sorrows away. She'll get over it, she's a robot after all.

CIEEIA: Why? What happened?

CONCHRIS: She has no mom.

CIEEIA: Aw! That's sad!

CONCHRIS: I don't know if this will change her anyway. {notices Chrionroar about to eat the Owl statue} Chrionroar? You're not about to eat that, are you?

CHRIONROAR: YES! {eats the Owl Statue but then spits it out} Yeugh! Tastes like a million years!

CIEEIA: Can you even taste years?

CONCHRIS: If you're an idiot, then yes.

CHRIONROAR: Ooh! A shark!

{Cut to the sea, a shark jumps out of the water, Chrionroar catches him in mid-air}

SHARK: OH NO! I'M CAUGHT! SOMEONE CALL PEST CONTROL!

{Several black-suited men jump on Chrionroar at once, the shark jumps back into the sea quickly}

CONCHRIS: Another adventure complete! Ha ha!

{The Paper comes down reading, "Click here to email Conchris!"}

CONCHRIS: Finally! My name is back on The Paper, baby!

CIEEIA: I kinda miss having the email show to myself, can I have it again?

CONCHRIS: NO!