(even if you aren't vegan)
Color Printer's E-mails/Pay-per-view
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Contents
Overview
Oh no! CP's e-mail is a subscription-based...thing!
Cast: CP, Bitmap, Rather Printing
Page 1
The following text is displayed on the SC 10000:
CP's E-mails: Subscription Site! *Only $13.99 a month! *Or take the $180.99 yearly package! *Cool E-mails! *Fun Games! *Bitmap Stuff! CLICK HERE FOR A 7 SECOND TRIAL!
7 Second Trial Transcript
{At the bottom, a timer is displayed.}
Color Printer: 1,2,3,4! {singing like a rock star} E-MAAAAAAAAAAIL!
Dear The Printer, What you be like in a Videlectrix game? Sincerely, Stinkoman
{CP reads halfway through the e-mail before the words "TRIAL OVER" is displayed.}
Page 2
Bitmap is holding a sign with the following text:
BITMAP STUFF! *Hear Songs *Watch stuff *Buy stuff *AND MORE! Click here for sample
Bitmap "Sample" Transcript
{Bitmap does a dance like The Homestar Runner's.}
Page 3
A TROGDOR! arcade cabinet displays the following text.
COOL GAMES!! Such as: *Printer's Quest (CLICK HERE FOR TRIAL!) *Bitmap's Algebra *And 3 more! Each game only adds $2 for the monthly package and $30 for the yearly package!
Printer's Quest Trial
This is EXACTLY like Peasant's Quest only Printer-ized. Also, you skip the controls screen. If you type anything but "QUIT" or try to leave the area, the following message pops up:
BUY THE FULL VERSION! *Commands such as "look", "save", and "wear mask"! *Ability to leave the area! *Possibility to "win" the game!
If you type QUIT, the game quits.
Page 4
ORDER NOW! First Name ________ Last Name ________ Nickname ________ Nick's Name ________ Month ________ D/O/B ________ Organ Donor ________ Car Keys ________ Passcode ________ Credit Card Number ________ (M)onthly or (Y)early? _ Submit
Page 5
Thank you. You will recieve your order in 6 to 8 weeks.
Fun Facts
- With the yearly package, it would cost $13.11 more than 12 months on the montly package.
- Also, with the games, each game costs $6 more for the yearly package than 12 months for the monthly package.
- The 7 second trial and the Printer's Quest trial are related.
- If you bought the monthly package and all 5 games, it would cost $23.99 a month.
- If you bought the yearly package and all 5 games, it would cost $330.99 a year.
- It would cost you 43.11 more money if you bought the yearly package.
- This is like the April Fools H*R thing.
- April fools!