Blue Lasermail/favorites

Blue Laser discusses some of his faves. Underwear drawers explode.

Cast (in order of appearance): Blue Laser, Bartender (voice only), Redd, Gunhaver (easter egg), Fightgar (easter egg), Silent Rip (easter egg), Reynold (easter egg)

Places: Computer Room, Bar, Movie Room, Cheat Commandos' HQ (easter egg)

Computer: Blasty 987

Date: Sunday, February 7, 2010

Page Title: Blasty Time!!

Transcript

BLUE LASER: {singing} Walkin' the streets, I got an email! {brings up an email}

Dear Blue Laser:

What are your favorites? Like, favorite drink, favorite day of the week, favorite type of wood... go hog wild, why not?

Yours, Skubby

BLUE LASER: {typing} Well you know, Skub-A-Dub, I do have a lot of favorites. So why not? Let's begin!

{Cut to the words "Fave #1" on a black screen.}

BLUE LASER: {voiceover} First off we have my favorite drink. This category of course goes to Root Ones, the official beverage of villains everywhere. They combine all the coldness of a one, and all the dryness of a root. I still remember the first time I tasted one.

{Cut to a bar. Blue Laser is sitting with several Root Ones bottles in front of him.}

BLUE LASER: Hit me with another one, man!

{Another bottle is slid across the bar to Blue Laser, who grabs it.)

BARTENDER: {offscreen} I hope you can pay for all these, Laser.

BLUE LASER: Err, yes. I seem to have left my wallet outside in the tank. Allow me to go fetch it and-

{Blue Laser quickly runs offscreen. After a few moments a vehicle can be heard taking off outside.}

BLUE LASER: {voiceover} Man, I scammed like every bar in town that night! Guess that's why I'm banned from every bar in town.. Any-freakin'-way-

{Cut to the words "Fave #2" on a black screen.}

BLUE LASER: {voiceover} Next we have favorite day of the week. That would be Thursday, when I give my minions their weekly motivational lecture!

{Cut to a light-yellow room. Blue Laser is standing in front of a screen, which is showing "Figure A", a picture of a silhouetted Cheat shooting a gun.}

BLUE LASER: Ya gotta believe in yourselves! When the Cheat Commandos shoot bullets at you, don't think-

{The screen changes to show "Figure B", a Cheat skull.}

BLUE LASER: -"Oh crap, I'm gonna diiiiieeee!" Instead, think-

{The screen changes again to show "Figure C", a Cheat blocking a bullet with his fist.}

BLUE LASER: -"Can I deflect this bullet with my fist? And if not, why?" {applause}

{Cut to the black screen again, this time reading "Fave #3"}

BLUE LASER: {voiceover} Favorite wood? Easy, none. When I need to burn something, I take the quicker route. I use gasoline.

{"Fave #3" suddenly changes to "Fave #4"}

BLUE LASER: {voiceover} Okay, number four. Favorite email I've ever answered. That goes to email number 1.5, continents.

{Cut to the Blasty's screen.}

BLUE LASER: {typing} And that's how I finally succeeded in blowing up Mongolia. Thanks for your question, Miyamoto!

{"Fave #5"}

BLUE LASER: {voiceover} And last but certainly least, it's favorite relative! This of course goes to brother Redd. There is truly no better punching bag and/or test subject than Redd Simone Laser Jr..

REDD: {voiceover} Uh, Blue...

{Cut back to the computer room. Redd Laser is standing next to the desk.}

REDD: Do you happen to know why my underwear drawer just exploded? And why it was filled with gasoline?

BLUE LASER: {closeup} Look, I may or may not have turned your underwear drawer into a scaled down model of the Cheat Commandos' Headquarters. {cut back to a full view of the room} But what really matters right now is that you get out of my face!

REDD: Whatever. Go back to checking emails on that ancient computer Lemmy scammed you into buying.

BLUE LASER: Keep it up and I'll turn your face into a model of a broken skull!

{Redd sighs and walks away. Cut to the Blasty's screen.}

BLUE LASER: {typing} So what do you think, Skrubs? Those were surely enough favorites to satisfy you for at least a week! And if not, get a life, man! I'm not here to fulfill your every wish! Jeez!

(The Laserjet Paper comes down.}

BLUE LASER: {quietly} Mumblin', grumblin', greedy little waste of my time!

Easter Eggs

• At the end, click on "get a life" to see a scene with the Cheat Commandos.
  

{Gunhaver, Silent Rip, Fightgar, and Reynold are standing around a sock drawer in the Cheat Commandos' Headquarters.} GUNHAVER: Alright, men! Pretend this sock drawer is Blue Laser Base! What are we gonna do?
SILENT RIP: Kick it!
FIGHTGAR: {simultaneously} Shoot it!
REYNOLD: {simultaneously} Buy it lunch!

Fun Facts

• Blue Laser's opening song is a reference to Because, It's Midnite.
• Miyamoto refers to Shigeru Miyamoto.