(even if you aren't vegan)
Chaos Emails.exe/Your Name
Summary
Chaos answers the origins of his name.
Cast(In order of appearance): Chaos, The Cheat
Places: Chaos' basement, the Fireplace
Computer: BELL 2999
Date: October 3, 2007
Transcript
CHAOS: Well, than. Didn't think this day would come. Here we go now!
{types "[email protected]//Email", Email appears onscreen.}
Dear Vii 2.0,
What's the delio with your namer?
Sam The Man
{Clears Screen}
CHAOS: {While typing} What's the delio with YOUR name? In all my life, I have never seen a person who's name has "The Man" in the end. Your family must have deep latin roots for such a weird name. Anywho, me name is derived from a long story and-- {Cell phone beeps} Hold on. Hello?
{Screen splits in two with The Cheat in the left-hand box}
THE CHEAT: {Cheat noises}
CHAOS: Seriously? I didn't think they'd finish it today! I hired them what, last night? Well than, let's tell the tale there.
{Hangs up and clears screen}
CHAOS: Coincidentally, a new addition to my house has just been added. It's perfect for story-telling and Father-Son bonding! Let's go!
{Chaos heads offscreen and enters into a room with a fireplace, chair, book, pipe, and The Cheat}
THE CHEAT: {Cheat noises}
CHAOS: Just like The Cheat said. This is the new Fireplace room! Now, then. Let's all rejoice as I tell the tale of my name.
{Sits down, puts pipe in mouth, and picks up storybook}
CHAOS: Today, in honor of Sam The Man, we shall tell the tale of my name. Now.
{Book opens up shows picture of Chaos}
CHAOS: As many of you know, my father is death.
{Flips page over to show picture of grim reaper}
CHAOS: That's him. He didn't give me my name to sound dark and evil, no no. I am christened with this name via video games.
{Flips page to show a device similar to a PS2}
CHAOS: There are two idols in the gaming universe of mine. The first is Vincent Valentine
{Page turns to show picture of Vincent Valentine}
CHAOS: He is a protagonist in Final Fantasy VII who can transform into a demon named Chaos. Not only is my name from that, but I am also part demon. See now? But it doesn't end there. Another Video game star with the name of Chaos comes from the Xenosaga series.
{Page turns to show a picture of Chaos from the Xenosaga series}
CHAOS: He's a 6,219 year old human really named Yeshuhosa, but everyone he knows calls him Chaos.
{Book closes}
CHAOS: So, as you can see, a lot of my Chaos-y heritage comes from video games. What do you think, The Cheat?
{silhouette of The Cheat is visible}
THE CHEAT: {Cheat noises}
CHAOS: Guess you're right. I better get back to that important Email. Seeya, The Cheat!
{Chaos runs offscreen and The Cheat hops into the chair}
CHAOS: {While typing} There you have it, Sam! Hope that shedded some light on your situation. Now then ,how do you explain YOUR Name, huh? Tell us all that!
{The Cheat walks through with the pipe in his mouth, blowing bubbles out of it}
CHAOS: Hey! That's my novelty pipe! I mean, real pipe that coincidentally--AGGGGGGH!
{Sprouts wings and flies after The Cheat}
CHAOS: Give it back or I'll break those cute little arms of yours!
THE CHEAT: {Cheat noises sounding similar to "You're never gonna catch me!"}
CHAOS: Oh, yes i will! Hyah! {Hurls fireball at The Cheat}
{Screen turns orange-yellow and The Cheat returns onto the screen with a black head and falls down}
CHAOS: {snatches pipe} Now gimme that! That'll teach ya a lesson!
THE END!