(even if you aren't vegan)
Chaos Emails.exe/BELL 2999
Contents
Summary
Chaos digs into the history of the BELL 2999, and shares some powerful secrets.
Cast(In order of appearence): Chaos, The Cheat, Bubs, Strong Bad, Homsar, King of Town, Kanjiro, Ryan, Heian, Auctioneer (easter egg)
Places: Chaos' Basement, Compy Auctionhouse
Computer: BELL 2999
Date: November 24, 2007
Transcript
CHAOS: I have no need for such simple technologies, Only {strums electric guitar;High pitched} E-MAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-HAI-HAI-ULL! {slams guitar over The Cheat's head}
THE CHEAT: {Angry Cheat noises}
CHAOS: Whoops.
{Types in "Run [email protected]//Email, Email appears onscreen.}
Congrats! You have downloaded "The_reality-bending_disco_virus.exe"! You should now see a lott oof stuf mEsssIng up. hAhAhAhAAAAAAAAAAAA!
CHAOS: Uhh. Only 1 thing to do: BELL-ETED!
BELL-2999-LETED!!!!!
Ha-ha, ha!
This virus is dumber than the first one.
{clears screen}
CHAOS: {While typing} I don't know why you all keep on sending me viruses. I can BELL-ete them, with no critical effects to the computer! I mean, You're all nut-jobs! But, I know little to nothing else about the computer. Let's find out! The Cheat!
{The Cheat returns onscreen, with an ice-pack on his head.}
CHAOS: Whoops. Sorry again buddy. Anyways, to the Compy Auction! {Both jump offscreen}
CHAOS: This is the Compy Auctionhouse. Anyone can buy a computer at any price.
THE CHEAT: {Cheat noises}
CHAOS: Well, if you're A:Lazy, B:An idiot, or C:Named Chaos, you would come here to buy a computer. This is where I got the BELL from it's creators, at Clamburger Enterprises.
{Cuts to Bubs, Strong Bad, the cheat, and Chaos standing in an auction house}
BUBS: {Acting as auctioneer} Ok, our first computer is a fine piece of equipment, and is only slightly shotgun'd! It's a two-in-one peoples! Introducing... Strong Bad's old Compy! Starting bids anyone? Yeah! You! The egg-head!
STRONG BAD: Uhh... {Rubbing his chin} Strong Sad!
BUBS: Ok. Good, good. Going once, twic-
CHAOS: Strong Sad and $5!
STRONG SAD: Aren't I worth anything!?
CHAOS: No.
STRONG BAD: No.
THE CHEAT: {Shouting Cheat Noises}
CHAOS: Woah! The Cheat! Calm down, man! He's not that much whiny dump!
BUBS: Ok. We all know Strong Sad is a whiny pile of dump, but-
STRONG SAD: Hey!
BUBS: BUT, we need to finish off this auction!
{One Hour Later...}
STRONG BAD: {In a faltering voice} Strong sad; $143.86; a years supply of yogurt; a broken DVD player; the blood of a mushroom; a talking monkey smoking a cigar; and a half eaten ham sandwhich, with mayo. Top that Cha-
KING OF TOWN: {Jumps on screen} MINE! THE SANDWICH IS MINE!! My precious... {Steals the sandwich from strong bad and runs off screen} Did you miss me....
STRONG BAD: Ok... no ham sandwich.
CHAOS: Oh yeah! Well, I bid Strong Sa-
HOMSAR: AaAAaAAaaAaAaA! Half of a half of a shoelace! AaAaaA-
BUBS: Deal! The compy of yours mister homsar!
HOMSAR: Why thank you tubs! {Homsar's hat flies off screen and he follows it with the compy.}
STRONG BAD: What the crap just happened!?
{Cuts back to chaos on his computer}
CHAOS: {While typing} And that's how I got my computer...
KANJIRO: What?! How does this have anything to do with how you got your computer?
RYAN: Yeah? What was that?
HEIAN: I think it was supposed to show more on the BELL's history, but you guys had to trail off with The H*R guys at the auctionhouse.
CHAOS: That's the end of my episode! Donk! {screen turns black}
HEIAN: Hold it! {screen reverts to normal} Look, everyone. Chaos bought it from Clamburger Enterprises for $100, only so he could huck it at old people's windows, but then he payed for internet uses, and made this show.
KANJIRO & RYAN: Wow.
CHAOS: Well, I have a closet full of computers for that now.
HEIAN: Oh.
CHAOS: Now, where was I? Oh, yes! Black Screen-ination! {screen turns black again}
THE END!
Fun Facts
Easter Eggs
If you click "computer..." at the end, you will see the real auctioneer:
{Cuts to a scene in the auction house}
AUCTIONEER: Sorry I'm late for the compy auction...
STRONG BAD: Wait... If your the auctioneer... then what is bubs doing on that podium!?
BUBS: Uhh... I was just... Um... warming your... podium? Ziiiip! {Bubs runs off screen}
AUCTIONEER: What a nice man warming up my podium for me. Well, let's get this auction started.
STRONG BAD: Umm... I don't think... never mind.
HEIAN: C'mon! I needs me a Make-n-tash!