RiffText/AruseusEmails/wolfstarter

Cast {in order of appearance}: Aruseus, Wolf, Cynder, Treecko

NOXIGAR: Oh! Oh! I remember this one!

NAMINE: You do?
NOXIGAR: Yeah. Ryan Bluefox sent me an email for Mudkip Emails so I gave him one in return. This was it.

NAMINE: Okay, then.

Places: The Beach, A Restaraunt (easter egg)

Computer: SkyPod

Date: August 8th, 2008

Transcript

ARUSEUS: {singing} Ooh wah ooh wah oh! Check your email, delete it if it's crappy, blah blah blah blah, the Email-a-dansen!

{Aruseus clicks the email icon}

Subject: Starter Pokemon for Wolf

Hello Aruseus
I hear Wolf is having a hard time with Cyndaquil.
Unfortunately, I do not have all 3 starters, since some girl named November took Torchic.
I only have Treecko and Mudkip.
But which of those two will Wolf want?

Sincerely,
Professor Birch

ARUSEUS: {typing} Jeez! Enough with starter Pokemon! Now Wolf needs one?!

NAMINE: See, if Arceus lampshaded ridiculous emails like this one, then he would be a lot funnier. That is, if the lampshading wasn't forced.

WOLF: Well, I do have trouble with Cynder...

ARUSEUS: Well, we should get you one so Birch Beer shuts up.

NAMINE: Well, look at that! I don't even get the context behind this statement and I think it's mildly amusing!

WOLF: I say we should get...Mu-

ARUSEUS: Treecko.

WOLF: But Aruseus, Treecko is weak to-

ARUSEUS: You're getting a Treecko.

WOLF: Wait! I-

ARUSEUS: Treecko!

{A Treecko lands on Wolf}

WOLF: OW!

TREECKO: Treecko?

WOLF: Hi.

ARUSEUS: CYNDER! Lunch time!

{Cynder runs in and dives at Treecko. Treecko hits him with a giant boxing glove and knocks Cynder out cold.}

WOLF: Holy damn.

ARUSEUS: What just happened?

NAMINE: Your plot to humiliate Wolf backfired immensely? I thought it was obvious.

WOLF: I'm buying you a pizza, Treecko.

TREECKO: Tree! Treecko!

ARUSEUS: Wow. Well that sucked.

{The Paper comes down saying "Jeez. You phail."}

ARUSEUS: Shut it, you.

Easter Eggs

• Click on "phail" for a scene.

{Cut to a resteraunt, Treecko is crying}

WOLF: Well, they were out of blue ones!

NAMINE: It wouldn't be a standard Arceus Emails episode if it didn't have a shoehorned Homestar Runner reference somewhere.