RiffText/AruseusEmails/triplets

Cast {in order of appearance}: Aruseus, Uxie, Mesprit, Azelf, Dialga, Palkia

{Namine gasps}
NAMINE: All pretension has flung out the window.

Places: Computer Room, Outside TLA House, TLA Living Room

Computer: E-Mach 1000

Date: January 17th, 2007

NAMINE: It's 2008.

Transcript

ARUSEUS: I'm checking email in a {Vector the Croc voice} computer room! {normal} Woah...was I just Youtube Pooped?

NAMINE: Yes, but what you did is a specific type. It's called choppy sentence mixing.

{Aruseus clicks the email icon}

Subject:Triplets = very you take care of

Dear Aruseus
Would you mind caring for the triplets while we take the day and night off?
They're too much for us to handle.
Their names are Uxie, Mesprit and Azelf.
Thanks for doing this of your own free will!
-Dialga and Palkia
Who cannot be reached while they take time off

ARUSEUS: {typing} Oh, you're leaving me your kids while you go on vacation? If I were you, take the kids with you! Don't leave them here with boing old me!

NAMINE: Pretty sure if you're going for a Homestar Runner impression, boing should be "bowing" or "bowling." Depends on context, I think.

{doorbell}

ARUSEUS: Oh, goody. That's probably those little ankle-biters now.

{Cut to a view of outside the house, Uxie, Mesprit, and Azelf are at the door.}

ARUSEUS: {opens door} Yello?

UXIE: Hello, mister! Are you Aruseus?

ARUSEUS: Thast happens to be my name.

MESPRIT: This is the guy, Uxie. Don't you know your Sinnoh?

AZELF: Chill, guys. Let's just go inside and spend the week here.

{The four walk in, Cut to the living room where they're all sitting on the couch}

UXIE: So...what do you wanna do?

AZELF: Is that a Wii?

ARUSEUS: Yes...

MESPRIT: Do you have Super Smash Bros. Brawl?

ARUSEUS: No, because the freakin' Nintendians delayed it to March!

UXIE: That sucks...wait, you are an Arceus, correct?

ARUSEUS: I guess you could say I am a humanoid incarnation of one...

UXIE: Make a copy, because Arceuses can do stuff like that.

MESPRIT: Where's your other 998 arms? I only see two!

ARUSEUS: What!?

UXIE: It says the Arceus molded Sinnoh with its 1000 arms.

AZELF: It's a joke! {laughing}

MESPRIT: So are you going to make the game or not?

ARUSEUS: Well, ok. I'll try.

{Aruseus' hands start to glow}

ARUSEUS: I'm going to make one with all the current characters, plus every Melee character except Roy, Young Link, Pichu, Ness, and the Doc. I'm also putting in Lucario, Bomberman, Mii, and Waluigi is not going to be an Assist Trophy.

NAMINE: So you'd theoretically be responsible for some of SSBB's flaws?

AZELF: I'm down with that.

{A game disk appears in Aruseus' hands. They play the game.}

ARUSEUS: Come on, Mario! Jump!

AZELF: Go Bowser! Kick his butt!

MESPRIT: Argh! Who knew Olimar could suck!?

NAMINE: It's not Olimar that sucks, buddy.
NOXIGAR: No seriously, I tried to main him when I actually cared about Super Smash Bros. Brawl. I stopped caring after spring 2010.

UXIE: It was your fault that you picked him, Wario is way better.

ARUSEUS: Again?

ALL THREE: YAY!

{Night arrives, The three are asleep on the couch.}

{doorbell}

ARUSEUS: Whu?

{Aruseus opens the door, Dialga and Palkia are at the door.}

PALKIA: We're home! How were our kids?

ARUSEUS: Perfect. They are excellent Brawlers.

DIALGA: They fought!?

ARUSEUS: No! I mean Super Smash Brothers.

DIALGA: You own SSBB!?

ARUSEUS: I made a disk with my...Arceus powers.

DIALGA: Can I have a copy?

ARUSEUS: Sure, what the heck? {makes a disc}

{The trio run out}

ALL THREE: Dialga! Palkia! We had sooooo much fun! {indistinct chatter}

ARUSEUS: Kids just being kids, I guess.

{The Paper comes down}

Fun Facts

Figure 'em out.

NAMINE: I get the feeling that sheer laziness is why Fun Facts pages are no longer a thing on some content here.