RiffText/Mystery Fanstuff Theater 3000/Bell Quest/5

SKULLB: Count your blessings, kids.

BADSTAR: Where are they?

CHWOKA: Who are "they"?

ANTI-BLING: Those idiots,

SKULLB: Any idiots in particular?

they fell into their own trap!

{pan down to show H44WP and the newly released Pure Watashi are stuck in a pit}

CHWOKA: He can't see nor hear the people directly below him.

PURE WATASHI: Don't worry, once I'm Demon Bell, We'll break out of here!

CHWOKA: One insecure little trap. You shouldn't be able to break out of it.

{Pure Watashi transforms into Demon Bell and breaks out of the pit with H44}

BLUEBRY: That was quick.

IM A BELL: Crap.

{Demon Bell pushes everybody into the giant mutant rat pit the door shuts. Everthing dark. Only eyes are seen.}

BLUEBRY: IS EVERTHING DARK A PART OF SPOOK CLIFF?
CHWOKA: Become one with Spook Cliff.

BADSTAR: Bellson, you are stepping on my foot.

BELLSON: Uhh... that's not me!

MUTANT RAT: Screeee!!!!!

CHWOKA: I didn't see anything about the Mutant Rat entering, so I should assume he was there the entire time. Thus, part of the main cast. Or they could be in mutant-rat land, I don't know, they never described the setting.
SKULLB: Or, perhaps, it just phased into reality. That seems to be working for the author so far.

BELLSON: Why dos everyhing want to bite my head?

BLUEBRY: Why dos everyhing have to me misspelled?
CHWOKA: I wouldn't immediately assume he wants to eat your head. If I were an inexplicably mutated rat, I would go for the feet first so they can't run away.

IM A BELL: Have you ever tasted your head?

VEGEROT:{weirded out} W-what do you mean by that?

BLUEBRY: Well, I thought the question was pretty straightforward.

BADSTAR: Uhhh... lights please!

{Vegerot lights a match. Camera pans out to show a million giant mutan rats surrounding everybody.}

CHWOKA: Aha! They were in mutant-rat land, apparently! Or mutan-rat, as it may be.

BADSTAR: OH CRAP!!!

SKULLB: Fun fact: exclamation points =/= volume

HOMESCHOOL WINNER: Hold on. Ba-Weep Gra-Na-Weep Ninnibon!

CHWOKA: Klaptu Barada Niktu!

{one of the rats bites Ebeneezer's arm}

HOMESCHOOL: Why didn't it work? It worked in Transformers, but why not here?

CHWOKA: This, folks, is the smart character.

IM A BELL: NERD!

SKULLB: Coming from you?!

{Everybody runs away, but Bellson stays.}

BELLSON: Uhh... so who likes tacos?

SKULLB: Yeah, nice, nice. Gonna talk about waffles and pie next, o master of random comedy?

ALL RATS: We do!!!!!

BELLSON: Well, too bad!

BLUEBRY: Such charm.

{Bellson headbutts some of the rats. that sends some rats flying through the air. Rats charge at Bellson, but Bellson delivers a very painful Flying spin kick,

SKULLB: Oh, come on. Now he's just making stuff up.

which sends some rats flying. Some more rats charge at him, but he punches them in the stomach and sends an uppercut to their faces, which sends even more rats flying. The rats run away, scared to death.}

VEGEROT: WHERE DID YOU LEARN TO FIGHT LIKE THAT!?!?!?!?

BELLSON: Soul Reaper Academy.

BLUEBRY: Soul Raper Academy.
SKULLB: How eerily accurate.

IM A BELL: Hey, they don't teach you that type of fighting there! I should know. I teach there during my freetime. Ever notice how weak Kenpachi is?

BLUEBRY: Mary Sue.

VEGEROT:{weirded out} Weak?!!

{Bellson feels a tapping on his shoulder. He turns around. 100 hundred Extremeley big muscular rats are staring at him. Bellson sighs and starts beating the crap out of the rats.}

BELLSON: This is getting annoying.

BLUEBRY: OH YES IT IS

Heads up!

{Bellson hits a rat head into Im a bell with a tennis racket}

IM A BELL: Um... EWW!!!

SKULLB: How is this man not today's Hemingway or Twain? This writing... this writing... this writing is.

BADSTAR: Need any help, Bellson?

BELLSON: Nah, I got this covered! Oh, I think you can help.

SKULLB: "I've got it all done with, but you can help me finish the job!"

One of those rats are trying to eat Vegerot.

BLUEBRY: BE CAREFUL I THINK IT ATE SUBJECT-VERB AGREEMENT

Go stop it.

{Badstar save Vegerot.}

BLUEBRY: Subject-verb agreement does seem to have gone AWOL. How I envy it.
SKULLB: I envies it too, Bluebry. I envies it too.

{1 HOUR LATER...}

H44WP: Uhh... Demonic Bellstrom? There's a problem.

END OF CHAPTER 5!

{Everyone walks out of the theater. Chwoka carries Skullbuggy}