TheDenzel's Interview Show/Original Bluebry muffin

TheDenzel's Interview with Bluebry muffin

THEDENZEL: Hello. Welcome to TheDenzel's Interview Show. Today's interview is with the master of grey, Bluebry muffin. Glad to have you here, Bluebry!

BLUEBRY: It's good to not be on fire, TheDenzel.

THEDENZEL: Okay, as I said before, you're the master of grey. What's up with that?

BLUEBRY: I enjoy the color grey. It's mainly because I have no favorite color, and I like to think of myself as a VERY boring person. Grey perfectly displays boring...ness.

THEDENZEL: Well, whatever floats your boat. Anyway, it seems you like to create transcripts and fanfics, why is that?

BLUEBRY: I'm more of a writey kinda guy than a gamey/picturey kinda guy. It's something that won't need a ton of updates and it allows me to pursue other, completely different projects.

THEDENZEL: Which one of your fanfics is your favorite?

BLUEBRY: They're like my children: I'm indifferent to them all! But if I had to play favorites, I'd have to say... my newest one, Homestar and Friend.

VOICE: READ NOW!

BLUEBRY: Mainly, it's because the story has a message. Which I have yet to understand. But it's in there alright!

THEDENZEL: What inspired you to write it?

BLUEBRY: This stapler on my desk.

THEDENZEL: {pauses} A stapler?

BLUEBRY: Yes. TOUCH MY STAPLER! FEEL THE METAL GOODNESS. {holds out stapler}

THEDENZEL: No thanks. But seriously. A stapler inspired you? How so?

BLUEBRY: I thought "Hey, what if I made friends with that stapler", and it snowballed from there.

THEDENZEL: Do you commonly talk with inanimate objects?

BLUEBRY: Yes.

THEDENZEL: Why?

BLUEBRY: For fun.

THEDENZEL: Soooo. If I were to hold up this pencil sharpener (hold up pencil sharpener}, would you talk to it?

BLUEBRY: Well not with YOU in the room. You'd think I'm crazy.

THEDENZEL: {mumbling} I already do. {stops mumbling} Sooo. If I were to leave the room, you would talk to it?

BLUEBRY: No, I don't think we share the same interests. I'd probably play Tetris on my phone.

THEDENZEL: Why Tetris? Don't you have any better games?

BLUEBRY: Are you saying Tetris is bad? ARE YOU?! GO SIT IN THE CORNER!

THEDENZEL: Hey! This is my show! Pac Man is better anyway! But why tetris?

BLUEBRY: Denzel, are we in the corner? ARE WE?! {points to corner}

THEDENZEL: I AM NOT DENZEL!!! THIS IS MY INTERVIEW SHOW!! AHHH! {throws pencil sharpener at Bluebry} Sorry 'bout that. Let's go on to the next question. Apparently someone here is a bit touchy about the subject of Tetris. Anyway, about your username. Bluebry muffin. Is there some sort of inside joke behind that?

BLUEBRY: {picks up THEDenzel and places him in the corner} Much better. Anyway, yes, a bit. I decided to join the knowledge base at a bad time; basically, when everything was shut down and new accounts couldn't be registered (IPs couldn't edit too). So, I searched around and bookmarked the pages I would edit when I was able to join. Well, I came across the Experimental Film page and learned there was a hidden commentary. You see, at the time, commentaries were known as Director Chats. New DVD with Director Chat, they'd say. Oh those were the good days. Back then, we didn't have this stupid green money we do NOW (or, at least here in the States). We had white money, printed on paper. No one liked it because if it went through the wash, it was a giant wad of wet paper. So, we called 'em Wet Papers. I'd walk into a soda shop, put down my yellow fedora, which was the style at the time, and ask for a milkshake. "Gimme two Wet Papers", he'd say. And then I'd leave and most likely go home to watch some good ol' fashioned TV. And back then, good ol' fashioned TV was a ball and cup game with the gal from I Love Lucy on it. The kids love'd 'em. But I remember how I got my name. Back then, you had to have two names for a username, 'cause hippies thought it was peaceful. Anyway, while listening to the Experimental Film Director Chat, Homestar said the words "Bluebry muffin". And I loved muffins. Or as we called 'em back then, Soft Tops. You'd walk into a bakery and two Soft Tops cost only one dollar. Or as we called [dollars], Wet Papers. Have I ever told you why? It's 'cause back then, it rained so much people liked to call things wet names. And I was going to do Bluebry Soft Top, but the hippies still wanted their two names or they'd peacefully use force to stop me. So, I had to go with muffin. So, I hope that answers your question.

THEDENZEL: {getting up from corner} Whoa! That was a lot longer than I expected. Well, you seem to have taken up a lot of time here. It's almost time to end. Would you like to say something before we go? Perhaps an apology for placing me IN THE CORNER???

BLUEBRY: Apology? No way. Here's my last statement.

BLUEBRY: Hello kids. I'd like to say that even though Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic 2: the Sith Lords is glitchy, try not to make these glitches seem so bad. It's a really good game. They can actually get kinda funny, if you think about it. So keep on playing. And remember - don't milk, stay in bully, and drink your school. No, that's not it... oh well. You guys know what I meant. And now, for my exit. MWA HA HA HA! {throughs a small capsule to the ground. Smoke arises and when it clears, Bluebry has disappeared.}

THEDENZEL: Find then, I guess you get no handshake. {to audience} This has been another interview from TheDenzel's interview show. Good night everybody.

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