Conshow/12

Summary

In a oh so totally original plot, Chrionroar's mother and father come to visit. What happens? Insanity, that's what.

Transcript

{Open to the airport, Conchris and Chrionroar are sitting on chairs}

CONCHRIS: So, tell me again. When are they coming?!

CHRIONROAR: When the dark of lights reaches the full circle of cheesyness!

{Conchris looks at Chrionroar confused}

CONCHRIS: Okay, now you've confused me.

CHRIONROAR: I LOST THE GAME!

CONCHRIS: Stop making me lose The Game, damn it!

CHRIONROAR: Fizzle boom!

CONCHRIS: That's it, I'm out of here.

{Conchris walks off, leaving Chrionroar to himself}

{Cue intro sequence, after it finishes, cut to Conchris' House - Living Room, Cruroar walks in with Cieeia and Conchris, he turns on the TV and they sit down}

CRUROAR: Let's see what's on the TV today...

{Cut to the Television, Cooksar Baker holds up a knife}

CRUROAR: Nope. {presses a button on the remote}

{The channel changes to Sarry Bcott holding up a bottle of Cillit Twang}

SARRY: Hi there! I'm Sarry Bcott!

CRUROAR: Hello... {presses a button on the remote} Bye.

{The channel changes to Mr. TV at a news desk}

MR. TV: Urgent news! Today, Everyone-is-going-to-die-in-ten-seconds town was obliterated today by some kind of nuke. Stay tuned.

CRUROAR: Nah. {switches TV off} There's nothing on!

CIEEIA: We just need something exciting to happen, that's all!

CONCHRIS: I was going to ask, have you seen Forest lately? She didn't appear in the last episode at all!

CIEEIA: Let's just say she needed some quiet time...

{Cut to the basement door that has several locks on it}

FOREST: {voice} Hello? Is there anyone there? Open this freaking door, damn it! I swear, I'll kill you Cieeia!

{Cut back}

CIEEIA: {laughs nervously} Well, I think I should be going now, so... SEE YA! {runs off}

CRUROAR: Man, the writer couldn't think of any good ideas this episode, huh?

CONCHRIS: Yeah, that's life for you.

{A door knocking sound is heard, horror music starts playing}

CONCHRIS: Who was that?

CRUROAR: I don't know... wait, wasn't Chrionroar's parents supposed to be visiting the house?

CONCHRIS: Oh lord no... Please let them be normal...

CRUROAR: Hey! That was my later line, you jerk!

CONCHRIS: Well, I just said it! So, nyeh!

CRUROAR: Somebody should really shut off the music, it's driving me crazy.

{music stops and Cruroar looks up to reveal Chrionroar on his head holding a steering wheel}

CHRIONROAR: I CAN MAKES IT DOC!

CRUROAR: Get off my head. {throws Chrionroar off-screen} How'd you get in... oh...

{Cut to the front door, Conchris had already opened it, two people stand outside}

CONCHRIS: Hello there! I'm Conchris. Nice to meets you! And you two are?

CHRIONROAR'S FATHER: I HAS NO NAMES!

CRUROAR: OH LORD NO!

CHRIONROAR'S MOTHER: ME NEITHERS!

CONCHRIS: Hey, Cieeia! Meet Chrionroar's parents, they came over for absolutely no reason!

{Chrionroar's father pounces on Cruroar and starts using a jackhammer on him}

CIEEIA: {off-screen} Yeah, if being mutilated by a JACKHAMMER sounds fun.

CRUROAR: {not feeling any pain somehow} Are you sure letting them in is a good idea? I mean, what could happen.

CONCHRIS: I'm sure that, by the end of this episode, everything will have gone along smoothly!

{Cut to a time card which says "Five Hours later", after a few seconds, cut back to the Living room, Conchris is bleeding slightly with a singe of fire on his head, he also charred and Cruroar is heavily mutilated}

CRUROAR: {imitates Conchris' voice} Everything will have gone smoothly! WELL WE HAVE THREE INSANE PEOPLE IN THE HOUSE!

CONCHRIS: Calm down, I'm sure we can find a way to get rid of them... {pulls out a pencil} WITH THIS!

CRUROAR: How could a pencil get rid of insane people?

CONCHRIS: It's not a pencil! Watch!

{Conchris presses a button on the pencil and it morphs into a human-sized Pencil Robot}

PENCIL BOT: HOW CAN I SERVE?

CONCHRIS: Find three insane people in this house and bring them to me.

PENCIL BOT: AFFIRMATIVE!

{Pencil bot walks off screen, cut to the Stairway, Pencil Bot only gets halfway before Chrionroar and his parents jump on him and start eating him}

PENCIL BOT: HELP! HELP! I'M BEING ATTACKED!

{A net falls on the three, Cieeia walks on-screen with Forest}

CIEEIA: Who knew that using bait is a great idea?

FOREST: I apologise to hurting your feelings off-screen.

CIEEIA: No, it's okay. But for now, I want to see what we should do with these three...

{Cruroar and Conchris walk on-screen}

CONCHRIS: Well, you could send his parents back where they came from and make sure they never appear in the series ever again.

CRUROAR: No, I have a better idea...

{Cut to Sirhcnoc's Lair on a Hill, a bag flies in}

SIRHCNOC: Ooh! Air mail! {opens the bag to reveal Chrionroar's parents} WHO ARE THESE TWO?!

CHRIONROAR'S FATHER: THIS IZ A BADS PLACE! LET US SOFF IT UP!

{They both start flying around breaking equipment and eating the monitors, Sirhcnoc looks on in terror}

SIRHCNOC: Oh god! HELP! MY LAIR IS BEING DESTROYED!

{Sirhcnoc is thrown off screen by a giant computer, Chrionroar's father walks in and looks at the camera, he stares at it, grinning, before he eats it}

{Cue credit sequence}

{Close to a screen with the words "END" on it}

CONCHRIS: {voice} This was a short episode.

CRUROAR: {voice} Yeah! It might even rival that of the shortest episode ever episode from another show.

CIEEIA: {voice} Does that even exist?

CRUROAR: {voice} I don't know.