Zippy Emails/emails/27

Overview

Zippy Email #27: job

Zippy shows the viewers around his office.

Transcript

ZIPPY: Every famous ladies love Zippymails! {opens email}

subject: Job

Dear Zippy P. Playtpus!
GET A JOB YOU LAZY BUTT
JUST WORK AT GOOGLE
FROM,

LEMON AKA THAT GUY THAT EMAILED MITCH

{Zippy screams the entire email.}

ZIPPY: {typing} Alright, Leh-man? Two things. One, {types "uno"} you need to lay off the yelling, man! My ears hurt! And dos, {types "two"} I already have a dang job! How do you think I could afford ol' Fruity, here? {clears screen} Of course, all you guys and gals out there are probably begging me to show you where I work, so... come with me!

{Zippy leaves the room.}

{Cut: CorpTech Industries. Zippy walks into an office, wearing a pink polo shirt. He sits down at his computer.}

ZIPPY: '{typing} Ah, good ol' CorpTech. My office du jour! This place is where me and the Water Cooler Gang, as I've deigned to call it, hang out at the water cooler and make chat! ... Oh! Here comes one now!

{Aruseus walks over.}

ARUSEUS: Hey, Zippy! What's been up?

ZIPPY: Not much, Aruman! I heard about your hundredth email!

ARUSEUS: Yeah, man! That was pretty cool, huh?

ZIPPY: All sorts of course!

ARUSEUS: So how's your email show going, Zip? I presume it's well.

ZIPPY: ... Do you even know what presume means?

ARUSEUS: I've been reading the dictionary, if you must know. I'm on chapter Q!

ZIPPY: {doubtfully} Yeah, sure. ... Oh, shoot! The boss is coming!

{An opossum with slick black hair and a white business suit walks over. He speaks with a vague southern accent.}

SLICK: Hey, Zippy! Aruseus! How's it going o'er here?

ZIPPY: Dah- dee- doh- good! It's going... just great!

SLICK: Good, good. You know, I'd finish up. Y'all's break's almost over!

ZIPPY: But... we're not on our break.

SLICK: Well! Yer gonna have to get back to work, then!

ARUSEUS: Bu-

SLICK: I'll be dockin' yer pay if'n you don't! Now ske-daddle!

{Slick starts walking away.}

ZIPPY: Yes, boss! {under his breath} Dang old possum thinks he can run this company with his greasy hair.

ARUSEUS: If I had hair, I would dye it green.

ZIPPY: But- you're covered- you have- never mind.

{Cut: Zippy's Bedroom. Zippy walks in, still wearing his polo shirt.}

ZIPPY: {typing} So there you go, Lemón. That's-a my job. Now quit asking me such stupid questions! {speaking} That's it, y'all. Tune in next time when I wrangle a cow!

Click here to email Zippy!

ZIPPY: Wow. That is one impressive "email me" message.