(even if you aren't vegan)
Zippy Emails/emails/17
Overview
Zippy Email #17: leg hunt
Zippy has to find a rogue leg.
CAST: Zippy, Fang
PLACES: Zippy's Living Room, The Forest
PAGE TITLE: ZCell!
Transcript
{Open: Zippy's Living Room. Zippy is watching TV.}
ANNOUNCER: And Phelps gets the gold!
ZIPPY: Oh, how I envy him. Him and his swimming.
{Zippy's phone rings.}
ZIPPY: Oh! What a perfect excuse to stop being jealous of an Olympian!
{Zippy opens his phone.}
Subject:halp meYo Zip,
I seem to have misplaced my leg. Pter and I were airsofting
and I hid my limbs in various areas to fool him. I'm having a hard time walking.
Fang Wolf
ZIPPY: Fang... Wolf? Why's that seem familiar? I think he was a boss in Mega Man or something. Anyhow... {typing} Of course I'll help you find your leg, Wolfman! I always enjoy a nice hunt!
FANG: {offscreen} Good!
{Zoom out. Fang is sitting next to Zippy.}
ZIPPY: AAAH! How the- did you- are you Fang?
FANG: The one and only. What clued you in?
ZIPPY: You have one leg?
FANG: Ah. Right. Anyhow, we need to find my leg, for the good of the world!
ZIPPY: Yeah, sure. So where do you think you lost it?
FANG: Didn't I tell you? Pter and I were airsofting, so I had to have hid it in the forest somewhere!
ZIPPY: The forest?
FANG: Yeah. Now are you going to keep repeating the last thing I say or are we going to find my leg?
ZIPPY: I don't know, I kinda like repeating what you say. It makes me sound like Solid Snake.
{Fang backhands Zippy.}
FANG: Let's go.
ZIPPY: Yeah, okay.
{Cut: a forest. Zippy and Fang are there, searching for a leg. Zippy is wearing a pith helmet and explorer's garb.}
ZIPPY: {in a thick British accent} I say, this leg has got to be here somewhere! Chap, do you know where you left it?
FANG: If you keep talking like that my knuckles would be happy to meet your face.
ZIPPY: {in normal voice} Aww. I liked that accent.
FANG: Alright, it should be around here somewhere...
{Zippy and Fang look around. Something small gets Zippy's attention.}
ZIPPY: Hey, Fang! I found something!
FANG: Hmm?
ZIPPY: Airsoft bullets... if these are here, the legs must be close by!
FANG: Hey, yeah! I'll check the bushes!
ZIPPY: Me too!
{Zippy and Fang check bushes. A while after, Zippy sees a gray foot in a bush. He pulls on it and finds a leg.}
ZIPPY: I got it! I got the leg!
FANG: {offscreen} You found it, alright.
{Pan over. Fang is now legless.}
FANG: Wrong leg, buddy.
ZIPPY: Yikes. How are you not dead?
FANG: Tragic woodchipper accident, robotic implants, yadda yadda.
ZIPPY: Oh. Sorry, man.
FANG: No prob. Now give me my leg back.
ZIPPY: Alright, just- {trips} oof!
{Zippy gets up. He looks at what tripped him and sees that it's the other leg.}
ZIPPY: I found it! Really, this time!
FANG: Oh, good!
{Fang takes both limbs and pops them back in place.}
FANG: Ah, that's better. No more hobbling around for me!
ZIPPY: {in a thick British accent} Quite good, quite good!
{Fang punches Zippy in the face. Fang then leaves Zippy, who is on the ground, unconscious.}
