Wikihood/arc/35

Summary

Everyone heads back to earth, the war over before it began.

Transcript

{The Invincible lands on the ground. Chaos, who is now in a miniature version of Demon Chaos' body without a facemask is standing on top of Cloak.}

CLOAK: Remind me why I volunteered to be your stool again?

CHAOS: No. It's a miracle I still have this thing.

{Cut to the Underworld. Noxigar is there at the foot of the entrance}

NOXIGAR: Is this where people go when they are finished with the universe?

{Hades arrives}

HADES: Yeah. I didn't think you would suicide.

NOXIGAR: At least I get to be with my fellow Organization members again.

DEATH: About that...Hello. I'm Mr. Malifact. Chaos' dad?

NOXIGAR: You're Mr. Malifact? Good to meet you.

{Noxigar puts his sleeve closer to Mr. Malifact's hand and they both shake}

NOXIGAR: Anyway, where's Xemnas? I have so much to report to him!

DEATH: Right...They're actually on the sixth floor of hell.

{Noxigar is at an elevator, looking at the directions}

NOXIGAR: I thought elevators moved vertically, not horizontally.

HADES: Look, don't worry about it. These elevators are the kind that get you anywhere. Besides, you did say your comrades were in a better place.

{Noxigar goes inside the elevator, and it moves to the sixth floor}

{OOC: I see this episode is better than a lot of previous ones. Give up on this one still?}

{OOC:Well, I feel that if we're able to re-write the plot and perform it well in the remake, we could further expand the universe from there. But I've still always wanted to pick up this Wikihood incarnation somehow. It's either this or the remake. And with 35 episodes, I think this may have a better chance. Let's just go with this one for now. Remake is our saving grace.}

DEATH: 'Kay. Now just ask the nice secretary where they'd be.

{Cut to the sixth floor. Noxigar finds a secretary.}

NOXIGAR: Hello, sir or madam, where would a Xemnas be in this sixth floor? I got these directions from Mr. Malifact himself.

{The secretary is revealed to be Sephiroth, with a bandage wrapped around the side his head, obscuring one of his eyes.}

SEPHIROTH: Oh, he's in room 13... Nice to see you again. I've just gotten here myself. Yeah, Mr. Hades decided to recruit me as one of his secretaries. Oh, and if it interests you, I saw Luxord around here too. He looked pissed.

NOXIGAR: Good to see you again.

{Noxigar examines each room to find Room 13. He knocks. The door opens to be Demyx}

DEMYX: Hey Noxi! I didn't think you'd be here!

NOXIGAR: I finally defeated Roxas.

DEMYX: You did? How?

NOXIGAR: I put my whole being into an attack that disposed of him and all other antagonists.

DEMYX: Heh. Good job pulling an Axel.

{Luxord comes by and walks through the door, shoving Noxigar out of the way as he does so.}

NOXIGAR: What's wrong?

DEMYX: He tried the Gauntlet. It's this set of rooms full of Yoku Blocks over the River Styx, hair-trigger lasers, and other mechanisms. The reward for fulfilling the Gauntlet is the way out of the Underworld, where you can go anywhere you want and start anew!

LUXORD: I can't bloody believe it! The two fatasses get through, and I don't!

NOXIGAR: Uh... which two people? I'm confused.

LUXORD: Lexaeus, and Xigbar!

DEMYX: He thinks he saw them complete it. They didn't. Zexion would've noticed if Lexaeus made it, and Xigbar would've recruited more members for Organization XIII if he made it. No one has ever made it past it except for one certain Herk Jerk.

NOXIGAR: I see... looks like I should try. I have yet to know what Yoku Blocks are.

DEMYX: They're blocks that act as platforms that intermittently appear and disappear after a certain amount of seconds.

SEPHIROTH: {Offscreen.} LIKE MEGAMAN! WHOO!

DEMYX: Like Megaman.

NOXIGAR: How many rooms full of Yoku Blocks?

DEMYX: Nine rooms.

NOXIGAR: And hair-trigger lasers?

DEMYX: The River Styx has a huge waterfall with plenty of lasers that, if you hit, they send you back to the very start of the Gauntlet.

NOXIGAR: Any other mechanisms?

DEMYX: None of us have made it past the hair-trigger lasers. Vexen's working on a potion to freeze them so we can figure out what's after.

NOXIGAR: Yeah, that's also why Lexaeus didn't make it, either.

DEMYX: You're the only person who hasn't tried yet! Go right ahead. See if you can make it past the Yoku Blocks.

{A montage ensues where Noxigar attempts each room of disappearing blocks. Room 1 is a basic one, but each room gets harder. Eventually Noxigar reaches the ninth room where he is almost done. However, the timing of the blocks changes and Noxigar falls down, inside the River Styx, which sends him down the waterfall. In the waterfall, a set of lasers attempts to block Noxigar from his exit. After the sixth laser, Noxigar hits a seventh laser by not being quick enough and gets sent back to the beginning of the Gauntlet.}

NOXIGAR: The Yoku Blocks weren't so bad, but those lasers are hard to avoid.

DEMYX: Told you.

BADSTAR: {Falls from the sky out of nowhere, landing on his feet} EPIC RETURN

{Death walks in.}

DEATH: Oh, god, who renewed Badstar's contract?

{Cut to space. Most everyone is on the Invincible.}

CHAOS: Man, that was anticlimactic.

{The ship takes a hit from the left flank.}

CHAOS: What The-

{Cut back to Hell.}

DEATH: Fine, I won't argue it. But still, what's the problem here?

DEMYX: There's no problem at all.

NOXIGAR: I'm going to keep trying your Epic Exit of the Underworld. The one with Yoku Blocks, hair-trigger death lasers, and supposedly other stuff.

{OOC: The Exit is supposed to be every Megaman fan's nightmare. Yoku Blocks and hair-trigger death lasers are just two nightmarish mechanisms in the stage that are supposed to make it hard.}

{Cut back to mars.}

CHAOS: I feel as though we're forgetting something...

{everything begins to shake and the cloud of darkness around Mars begins to lift, to reveal a huge crack in the universe.}

CHAOS: Right. That.

{The hole sucks in all of the darkness.}

CHAOS: Wait. That's where Earth is supposed to be, right?

{The ship takes another hit to the left flank.}

CHAOS: Oh crap. I keep on forgetting left and right.

{Adel's ship flies right out and rams into the Invincible.}

ADEL: FATHER!

CHAOS: I thought you died.

ADEL: No, I just have none of my previous powers. Whatever your friend did cured me, and as thankful as I am, I still have a mission to do. I have to strand you here and destroy this universe.

CHAOS: Sucks.

{Chaos makes the Invincible take a 90^o turn, and shoots the Red Eye Laser at Adel's ship. The laser not only damages the exterior, but gives the Invincible some push, and they escape.}

CHAOS: OK, now if I know this universe, I should know that the Underworld is still connected to earth somehow. Now we just need to find a way. This'd be a lot easier if it wasn't just me, Leo, Cloak, and Van. Oh, Sephiroth, where are you?

{Cut back to the Underworld. Noxigar falls, again. He ends up back at the meeting room}

NOXIGAR: Why do I even try?

DEATH: You...want to learn the shortcut?

NOXIGAR: Excuse me?

DEATH: The shortcut. It'll get you right back to the tear in the universe, and I can give you a cheap method of transportation, but I can't do anything else after that. Besides, I think you'll want to get to Namine soon...

NOXIGAR: Oh god, why?

DEATH: It's getting to the point where it actually drains her powers greatly to support all of this madness. She's going to begin destroying EVERYTHING and tearing apart the fabric of this universe to restore all of her power!

NOXIGAR: And who knows what she could do with all of that free power. What do your mathematicians say about the amount Kingdom Hearts spin-offs she'll be able to make with all of that?

DEATH:It's...It's over...It's over ni-

{Black screen.}