(even if you aren't vegan)


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{Noelle arrives to her apartment. Across the living room of it, are body parts belonging to one individual strewn about; nothing is bleeding, but Noelle is immediately freaked out.}

NOELLE: Give me one good reason why I shouldn't call the police.

{The body parts re-connect to each other, almost as if done magically.}

RYLAK: Uh, because you know it's me?

NOELLE: What the actual hell is this?

RYLAK: Don't you know? I like the sensation of separating my-

NOELLE: Honestly I'm confused, more than anything.

RYLAK: Have you never heard of the modular fetish?

NOELLE: I thought "modular" was just the name of some mechanic in a card game I sometimes play!

{Short pause.}


NOELLE: How long have you had this fetish?

RYLAK: Nine years? I want to say nine years.

{Noelle's eyes widen.}

NOELLE: Jegus fuck.

{Noelle's eyes widen even more.}

NOELLE: What are you even doing in my apartment?! It's three in the morning!

{Cut to outside; the moon is full, and night has fallen.}

RYLAK: Lucius and I got into a bit of a scuffle and-

NOELLE: What was Lucius doing in my apartment?!

RYLAK: He was getting you a robotic assistant so that when you partake in Battel Tournament 2020-

NOELLE: Who said I wanted to do Battel Tournaments anymore?!

{Noelle facepalms.}

RYLAK: You got pretty shitfaced a couple nights ago...

{Flashback to last Tuesday. Noelle has had several bottles of wine, and looks visibly flustered.}

NOELLE: And I want a robot maid with modular breasts, for the next Battel Tournament!

{A man in an Arceus fursuit takes notes.}

LUCIUS: That can be arranged.

{Cut back to the present day.}

NOELLE: Magical realm.

{Noelle goes to pass out on a couch. Fin.}