(even if you aren't vegan)
The Strong Sad Wets Yonder Bed
An old work of mine from 2010. Strong Bad busts out more kids book action.
Cast (in order of appearance): Homestar, Strong Bad, Strong Sad, Bubs, The Cheat, Strong Bad, Zarel, Horrible Painting, Homsar
Places: The Computer Room, The Field
Page Title: The Other Timeless Classic!
Transcript
{Black screen}
HOMESTAR: Previously {said as "Pr-eh-viously} on Homestarrunner.com...
{Fade to the Computer Room, Homestar is sitting on the floor while Strong Bad holds "The Homestar Runner Gets Something Stuck In His Craw" in his hand.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Bravo, Strong Bad. You simply must read one more.
STRONG BAD: Ohh, fine, fine. So I shall. How about {takes out another book and smiles} The Strong Sad Wets Yonder Bed?
{Strong Sad leans in}
STRONG SAD: There is no such kids' book!
{The cover for The Strong Sad Wets Yonder Bed flies up as this line is said}
STRONG BAD: {voiceover} Or is there?
{Strong Bad proceeds to narrate the story}
The Strong Sad Wets Yonder Bed.
{Next page shows Strong Bad surrounded by monochrome circles}
Nobody loves the Strong Sad. He is a sad little [guy.] dumpface.
{Next page shows Strong Sad lying asleep in his bed}
One night, Strong Sad was lying soundly asleep in his bed.
{Next page shows Strong Sad awake, but looking at a wet spot on his bed}
The next morning, [Strong Sad] Stupidface awoke to find an odd wet spot on his bed cover. "It appears I have wet my bed!" said Strong [Sad.] Fat.
{Next page shows Strong Sad in the Field}
Strong Sad went out the next morning to find something that could make the wet spot go away, but he didn't want to be too obvious.
{Next page has Strong Sad talking to Bubs}
Strong Sad asked Bubs for a hair dryer. "Can I have a hair dryer, please?" asked Strong Sad, clearly asking for a hair dryer.
{Next page shows a close-up of Bubs and Strong Sad. Bubs is handing a hair dryer to Strong Sad}
Bubs gave [Strong Sad] the elephant what he wanted without question. "Thanks, Bubs!" replied Strong Sad. [with an unusually creepy bit of happiness.]
{Next page has Strong Sad drying his bedsheet} Strong Sad dried the bedsheet and the wet spot disappeared. "Hooray!" cheered Strong Sad. [Okay, this is getting creepy.]
{Next page has Strong Sad sleeping}
After returning the hair dryer, Strong Sad went back to sleep that night.
{Next page has Strong Sad awake again; the wet spot is back.}
The next morning Strong Sad saw that he had wet the bed again. "I've never wet my bed before!" shrieked [Strong Sad] Plumples.
{Next page, Strong Sad is in the field with Strong Bad and The Cheat.}
Strong Sad went out to find Bubs again, but [Strong Bad and The Cheat] two awesome dudes started laughing at him.
"You wet yonder bed!" said [Tiny-Handed] Strong Bad, laughing out loudly.
{Next page shows a middle shot of Strong Sad}
Strong Sad was ashamed and slumped back home.
{Next page shows Strong Sad's closet}
That night, Strong Sad hid in his empty closet. "A wet closet is less noticeable than a wet bed." He said to himself.
{Next page shows Strong Bad and The Cheat sneaking into Strong Sad's room. The Cheat has a bottle of water.}
Just then, Strong Sad saw from the closet that Strong Bad and [The Cheat] a little yellow rat were in his room. "We're gonna spill this on the bedsheet so Strong Sad thinks he wet himself!" said Strong Bad.
{Next page is a divided picture. One half shows Strong Sad with a camera, and the other shows Strong Bad and The Cheat looking around confused}
Just then, there was a flash. "What was that?" said Strong Bad.
{Next page has Strong Bad talking to the Cheat.}
"Meh!" said The Cheat. "You're right," said Strong Bad. "It was probably just the lightning!"
{Next page has Strong Sad in the Field showing the picture to Zarel.}
The next morning, Strong Sad went to Zarel to show him the picture. "If Strong Bad told you I wet my bed, then here's proof I don't!" said [Strong Sad] the Fatso Supreme.
{Next page has Zarel giving Strong Sad a board of some sort.}
"Put this in Strong Mad's closet," Zarel said, "It will scare the pants off of them."}
{The next page has Strong Sad slipping the board into Strong Mad's closet.}
Strong Sad then did what [Zarel] the weird lizard told him to do.
{The next page has Strong Bad and The Cheat looking in Strong Mad's closet}
Strong Bad then went to Strong Mad's closet because he thought he left his fireworks in there. "I swear I put it here, The Cheat!" said Strong Bad.
{The next page has Strong Bad and the Cheat on the floor, shaking and shivering. The Horrible Painting is seen.}
Just then, Strong Bad and The Cheat were struck with fear for there was a horrible painting in there! "Aaah! Jibblies!" shrieked Strong Bad.
{The last page has Strong Sad outside the room, listening in on them, cracking a slight smile}
Strong Sad was delighted that he got back at his brother. "That will teach you," chuckled Strong Sad. [Man...why is he so freakin' happy in this one...?]
{Cut back to the Computer Room, Homestar is still on the floor, and Strong Bad holding the book}
HOMESTAR: Man. That story wasn't that great.
STRONG BAD: I'll say, not enough Strong Sad beatings-up.
HOMESTAR: That story needs more Homsar.
STRONG BAD: Homsar, eh? Well, this next one I have is The Homsar Defies the Laws of Physics and Space and Time.
{Strong Bad pulls out a book cover with Homsar on it and a big, distorted, multi-colored swirl pattern.}
HOMESTAR: Eh. Story seems too childish for me.
STRONG BAD: I'd have to disagree. This one talks about physics and things.
HOMESTAR: Physi-what now?
{The End!}