(even if you aren't vegan)
The SkullB Show/2
Contents
Overview
Episode Two: Super Mall
SkullB and all get stuck in the mall. Featuring guest star Tom.
CAST: Casey, Skullbuggy, Jerry, Tom
PLACES: Burgerdome, Decentville SupraMall, SkullB's Apartment
PAGE TITLE: Consumerism Abound!
Transcript
{The show opens with Casey and SkullB at the Burgerdome.}
CASEY: I thought you said you couldn't eat!
SKULLB: Who cares about continuity? I'm hungry here!
CASEY: Hm. Well, got any plans today?
SKULLB: Well, I wanted to go to the mall today, just for the heck of it.
CASEY: Hey, can I come? I love the mall!
SKULLB: {jumps up} WELL WHY DON'T YOU MARRY IT? HUH? WHY NOT? HUH? HUH?
{SkullB floats in the air for about ten seconds.}
CASEY: Yeah, I'm not paying for the food.
{Cue theme song.}
{Cut: The Decentville SupraMall. Jerry, Casey and SkullB are there, looking at all the stuff.}
JERRY: Can't you just smell the consumerism in here? Man, is it invigorating!
SKULLB: You know, I'd love it if you didn't bring us down for once.
JERRY: I wasn't being sarcastic-
CASEY: EEE!
{A window breaks.}
CASEY: Look. At. That. SKIRT!
{Casey runs over to a window and presses her face against it. Inside is a mannequin wearing a skirt that is oddly similar to hers.}
CASEY: It's so cute!
JERRY: And it looks like every one of your other skirts.
CASEY: So? I have thirteen skirts. THIRTEEN IS NOT AN EVEN NUMBER!
SKULLB: So... are you going to buy that?
CASEY: Of course! Wait here for about an hour until I get back.
{Casey skips into the store.}
JERRY: Well, I'm off to the food court.
SKULLB: Yeah, that's probably a good idea.
{Cut: The food court. Tom is sitting at a table, eating a burger. SkullB and Jerry walk over.}
SKULLB: Hey, aren't you from that other, funnier, and highly successful show?
TOM: Yeah, why?
SKULLB: Cool! We're gonna get twice as much viewership tonight!
TOM: You know, you could spend less time completely demolishing the fourth wall and actually progress the plot a little bit.
SKULLB: Oh, the plot. Forgot about that. So, what's with you? Why are you dropping by our little town?
TOM: Well, they've got an Orange Julius here. Do you know how hard it is to find one of those?
JERRY: ... Why are you really here?
TOM: Look, I got fifty bucks to appear here and I'm not wasting it on this burger. Which I might admit is the tastiest damn burger I've ever had.
{The words "Burgerdome: Best Burgers in the State!" appear at the bottom of the screen.}
SKULLB: So, now that you're here, what do you plan on doing for the rest of the episode?
{Suddenly, the lights dim and all the escalators stop moving. The automatic doors shut completely, and everyone is locked from the inside.}
SKULLB: How convenient! We're stuck in the mall!
TOM: Amazing. The originality in this storyline seeps from every pore.
JERRY: Would it kill the author to give me at least more than ten lines?
{Cut: a computer. Zippy is sitting there.}
ZIPPY: Hey! Quit complaining!
{Cut: The Crevicetm clothing store. Casey comes out of the dressing room to find the store completely abandoned.}
CASEY: ... Hello? Anyone?
{Casey walks around, looking for someone.}
CASEY: ... So I can keep this skirt? Thanks!
{Casey leaves the store.}
CASEY: Anyone? At all?
JERRY: {from afar} Casey? Casey, are you there?
CASEY: Jerry? What's going on?
{Jerry, Tom and SkullB walk up to Casey.}
JERRY: So it turns out that we're locked in here.
CASEY: WHAT? You mean I'm stuck in here with two men and a buggy? ... Hey, I should write that down. Sounds like an awesome sitcom.
TOM: Yeah... so, who are you?
CASEY: I'm Casey Harris, funny guy and requisite girl of the series!
JERRY: And I'm Jerry, straight guy and pessimist.
SKULLB: And I'm Skullbuggy, two-time gold medal winner and professional swimmer!
{Pause.}
SKULLB: What? Can't I have a funny line?
TOM: Dear Lord, this will be the worst day of my life.
{Cut: the food court.}
SKULLB: Alright, as the leader and main character, I suggest we try to find a way to restore power to the mall.
CASEY: I agree! We need to find the source of power and try to find a way to restart it!
JERRY: But... how?
SKULLB: Lady and gentlemen, I have an idea.
{Cut: a diagram. As SkullB speaks, a diagram is drawn accordingly.}
SKULLB: You see, we as a group will split up and try to find the generator. When one of us finds it, we yell that we found it. We keep yelling so that all members can find the one person and the generator. When we find the generator, we attach these jumper cables I have here to my engine and the generator, and I will rev up, powering the generator and restarting everything in the mall. We then regroup at Jamba Juice and get delicious smoothies.
{SkullB rolls up the diagram.}
SKULLB: Got it?
ALL: Yep.
SKULLB: Good! Let's roll.
{Cut: Hot Topic. Tom is there, looking for the generator. Suddenly, he finds it behind a rack of T-shirts.}
TOM: Aha! Hot Topic! The one place nobody would bother to look!
{Tom exits the store and starts yelling. Suddenly, everoyne comes to the store.}
SKULLB: So you found the generator?
TOM: Yep. You know what to do?
SKULLB: Yep.
{SkullB takes out some jumper cables, attaches them to his engine and to the generator, and begins revving up. Suddenly, the lights turn on and all the machinery starts working.}
ALL: YEAH!
TOM: Finally I can get out of this podunk town!
SKULLB: Why not stay a bit?
TOM: If this is what happens every day, I don't think I want to.
SKULLB: Oh, come on, please?
TOM: Nah, I've got a show. Maybe you can come on sometime.
SKULLB: Really? Awesome!
{Cut: SkullB's Apartment. Everyone is on the couch.}
SKULLB: Well, everything is back to normal!
{Suddenly, a zombie comes from offscreen. Casey takes a mallet and beats it to death. Everyone stares at her in shock.}
CASEY: What? It was clearly violating my rights as a woman. No means no!
JERRY: But did you really have to beat it with a mallet?
CASEY: YES.
{Casey beats Jerry with the mallet.}
{Cue end credits.}
Ask Jerry
JERRY: Hey, all! It's me again, answering another letter!
Dear Jerry, How come you type with boxing gloves on? You're pal, Joe
{Pause.}
JERRY: Skully, get the shotgun.
SKULLB: Abso-posi-lutely!
