The C-Bit Show/2

a parody.

CAST: {in order of appearance} Cryptogamer, Vid, ????, Chu, Hammaker, Spritel, Qwert, Ninja Robot.

Transcript

{open: A dark screen. Cryptogamer is here.}

CRYPTOGAMER: Hello and welcome to the second episode of The C-Bit Show. Since I'm really frustrated because a game I'm trying to make keeps glitching up, I've decided to do the old crappy comedy show backup plan: a parody of a old-timey horror movie. {wellfaces} So here we go!

{cut: a laboratory. Vid and Cryptogamer are here, dressed in lab coats. Vid is crouching over a table, holding a pencil. He scribbles on the table for a bit, then stands up.}

VID: It's ready, Cgor. Raise the table!

CRYPTOGAMER (CGOR): Yeah, whatever, Dr. Videnstein. {pulls a lever on a freakin' huge machine next to him. The table rises up, out of the ceiling, and a meteor hits it. The table lowers back down.}

CGOR: Uh, wasn't lightning supposed to strike it?

VID (DR. VIDENSTEIN): Course not, dummy! Lightning'd disentergrate it! We are tryin' to bring a piece of paper with a stickman on it to life, y'know.

CGOR: Oh yeah.

{suddenly, the paper gets up and out the door.}

DR. VIDENSTEIN: Now why the crap didja let it go?

CGOR: Oh, crap. That's it. I quit.

{cut: a purple screen.}

VOICE: And now a word from our sponsors.

{a high-tech looking computer appears.}

VOICE: Introducing the Dakky 2300. With 20 gigs of memory, you'll never have to delete a file unless it's evidence again! Only *coughninethousandandcoughwheeze* Ninety Nine Dollars. Only from Naire Industries!

{cut:A village. It is in turmoil. Hammaker and Chu are running around screaming. The buildings are on fire. Dr. Videnstein walks in.}

DR. VIDENSTEIN: Oh my crap what the crap have I freakin' done!?

{Spritel flies out of a roof. The paper-monster-stickman comes out of the house that the roof is attached to.}

DR. VIDENSTEIN: Well, I can't blame him.

{Qwert flies in.}

QWERT: Dr. Videnstein! We gotta get that abomination in the windmill! We can afford to burn that

DR. VIDENSTEIN: You're right, Qwertval.

{Suddenly, Stickmonster comes up and punches Qwertval (Qwert).}

QWERTVAL: Gah! Dying, dying...I dead now. {Floats to the ground.}

DR. VIDENSTEIN: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I kill you for that, Sticklym'n! {chases monsterpaper to the mill. Monsterman goes in. Dr. Videnstein grabs a torch and is about to set the place on fire when...}

CHU: Stop! It's saying something in sign language!

{pan to the paperstickmanmonster, who is making frantic symbols with its hands.}

DR. VIDENSTEIN: Well I'll be danged. WTC is it sayin', random villager?

CHU (RANDOM VILLAGER): Please...stop...my...name...is...Jeff...I...come...bearing...pie...and...cookies. Well who could resist that deal?!

HAMMAKER: Do tell.

DR. VIDENSTEIN:Not Me! Come on down!

{cut:the dark screen from the beginning. CryptoG is still here.}

CRYPTOGAMER: And so, they ate pie and cookies and the show gained a new charcter. Is there anything I left out?

{Ninja Robot appears.}

NINJA ROBOT: 100 1010001 11! (You forgot me!) {karate chops CG into oblivion.}

THE END!