Sprite Comics Are Terrible/1

I frequent the webcomic hosting site Smackjeeves quite alot. And when I do, I FIND ALMOST NOTHING BUT GARBAGE. Granted, there are alot of good comics out there. But for the most part, they suck. Today's example is called "Heroes of.."...... and that's it. What are they Heroes of? New York? Earth? WHAT???

Okay, here's the banner. It's really uninspired and boring. Look at that puke green grass and uneventful skyline. And why is there a cat there? What is the purpose of throwing a cat in there? Are you trying to be funny? When I see a random cat I don't think "Ha Ha", I think "WHO LEFT THE DOOR OPEN GET THAT CAT OUT OF HERE".

To understand how much this comic sucks, let's look at a few examples.

Look at these characters. One of them is Megaman but his suit is a darker color. The other is like a normal human carrying a shield. Why? And what's with his mouth? He looks like a damn hick like "DURR DUUR".

When I first saw this comic, I was confused as to what those big lines under Sonic and Mario were. It was only later when I got my magnifying glass to read that ungodly small text that I thought "could they be SLEDS?" Now, I know some people don't have artistic skills, but don't tell me you can't make a line BROWN, adding at least one identifying feature to that """"""""""""sled"""""""""".

Yeah, I think one of the first rules of referencing a song is making sure you know the lyrics before you reference it. But if you already know the song, how in the holy mother of God do you mishear "Big" as "British"?! At least this comic doesn't have that disgusting grass that infects every corner of this comic's existence.

And what is going on in this comic? I mean, the "BLAMO" in the third panel signifies an explosion, but they just end up floating in the water. What happened to the boat? Did the rower just blow the boat, effectively killing himself in the process? Or did he create an explosion so powerful it managed to blow his passengers out of the boat without causing any disturbance? The world may never know..

Let's talk about the punchline. It's passable by itself, but lemme tell you: They abuse this line throughout the entire comic.

OKAY, WE GET IT. YOUR FRIEND ANDREW IS AN IDIOT. WE NEED NOT HEAR IT EVERY SECOND OF OUR AGONIZINGLY PAINFUL LIVES.

In fact, all the writing in this strip sucks. Apparently they're in some story where they visit Italy, but it's just a bunch of dumb jokes centered around Andrew blowing crap up and his pal calling him an idiot. And, blowing up a Church...

I'm not touching that.

So let's review: Bad graphics, bad writing, bad jokes. This comic has it all!

3/10

This comic may be bad, but it is God compared to what's ahead..