Patrick Email.exe/05.5

Iori steals Fang's legs, so Patrick fights Iori in an Over-The-Top Battle Royal.

Cast (in order of appearance): Patrick, Iori, Fang Wolf, Strong Bad, Homestar, Boba Fett, Big White Face

Transcript

PATRICK: {typing "patrick_email.exe"} I'm trying to think of a rap, so hold on. {humming} Do do do... Do... {not humming} I can't even think of what to say!

Dear Patrick,
Tell Iori to gimme back my legs!

Fang again

PATRICK: Not again... IORI!

IORI: {comes in with Fang's legs} What?

PATRICK: Give me back the legs.

IORI: NO! WE SHALL BATTLE FOR IT!

PATRICK: Ok. But I pick the match.

IORI: What?!? Why?

PATRICK: 'Cause I'm just that mean. We shall fight for it in an Over-The-Top Battle Royal!

{Cut to a wrestling ring in the middle of the field. Patrick and Iori are in the ring, while the user Big White Face is sitting at a commentators table, and Fang, Strong Bad, and Homestar are watching}

FANG: Win the match so I can get my legs back, Patrick!

STRONG BAD: Win the match so you can keep the legs, Iori!

FANG: {punches Strong Bad} No, Patrick will win the match, or else I will punch both your lights out.

STRONG BAD: Oh, really? I can punch you out! {hits Fang lightly; short pause}

FANG: Yeah, really.

HOMESTAR: I came here for entertainment.

{Cut to Boba Fett at a ring bell}

BOBA FETT: I'm here to get paid. {rings the bell}

BIG WHITE FACE: Ok, the match has started.

{Patrick clotheslines Iori out of the ring}

BIG WHITE FACE: What? Are you kidding me? It ends on that! It ends on a simple clothesline out of the ring. Wait, one second, a new record!

IORI: Ok, ok, you get the legs back.

{gives legs back to Fang who puts them on}

FANG: Iori, you're bad at stealing.

HOMESTAR: I can't believe it! I paid good money to see this!

PATRICK: You didn't have to pay.

HOMESTAR: Yeah I did!

PATRICK: Who told you?

{Homestar points to Big White Face}

HOMESTAR: That guy.

BOBA FETT: Ok, when do I get paid?

{The Paper comes down reading: "Click here to email Patrick"}

Fun Facts

Real-World References

• The part with Strong Bad and Fang Wolf is a reference to the "O RLY?" franchise.
• Boba Fett is a character from Star Wars.