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NachoMan's Blog
NachoMan's Average Blog - Wow look at all that space I need to fill I'd better write something long to fill it all oh I have a little bit left
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#4 Random Thoughts 02:56, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
I'm feeling rather bored, so I decided I would type whatever comes to mind here and hope it it at least mildly entertaining. I need a better place to express all of my random thoughts. I get so many ideas, conversations, inspirations that just pop into my head at random and usually they're pretty funny or thought provoking, but I never have anywhere to talk about them or anything.
Here's a really weird concept for a graphic novel or a movie. Some guy is trapped in an infinite void of nothingness. He doesn't know how he got there, he doesn't know why, but he can only return to his past life if he answers one question. It's not a question he knows the answer to, so he's trapped in this blank world forever until he shouts out a combination of words that create the answer. It sounds a lot stupider when I put it on paper..
Why does indie rock get to be a genre. It's not like music distributed by a big record label is called "record label rock".. Is it? I guess there's corporate rock, but that really applies to sell out bands.. I think. I'm not too up to date on the whole music term thing. Why does indie rock get to be a genre. It should just be "rock". We already have too many subgenres as it is. We had rock and roll (or rock n' roll), and that evolved into the more sophisticated rock more commonly known as "classic rock". There's psychedelic rock, which is just rock on acid, progressive rock, which I guess is just philosophical rock. I never understood that, why does the content of your lyrics determine your genre? We have punk, a lot of it I don't really like. I mean, I guess it was cool and revolutionary in the seventies, but if you're still the band that plays "screw america" and wears all black, just cut it out, it's been done. Also, Green Day, just go back to writing songs about self hatred and the like. We get it, bush sucks. No need to go all scene on us.
Why do people have all these labels, too? There's never any "normal" kids, everyone falls into a social group. Preps, jocks, emos, nerds, I don't get it. Why does "goth" have so many sub groups? Goth, Emo, Scene. What's the point. It's not like people parade around with signs saying "yeah, I'm a scene kid". There's no "Emo march on washington". I guess I kinda understand jocks, I mean, if you're in sports at your school, it sounds better than "athlete". I used to really hate preps, but I don't hate all of them, just the stoner kids, the sluts, the ones who can come in to class 30 minutes late, stand on the desk and smoke a joint and receive nothing but a scolding from the teacher for it. Like, how do you get this way? When are we just going to weed out all these losers from the system, and not the kids, but the parents, the parents who make their children into these spoiled, whore, trash people who just clutter up my life and fill me with rage. What is an emo? Someone who dresses in all black? Well, I dress in black, but not every day. And I don't constantly rant about killing myself. Oh, well then you're a scene kid. Scene? What the hell is scene? Oh, it's a non-depressed emo. So, we're giving the kids with a mental illness a label now? What the hell? Why don't we just start making fun of all the retarded people in the school. Oh, wait.
How is it possible to have a girlfriend in high school. Not in high school I guess, but in you're earlier years of high school. First of all, this is like the hardest time, transitioning to a new school, having to adjust to the inflated work load. Second, you don't even have a car yet. Why would you date someone without a mode of transportation? I mean, If your mom is driving you to the Olive Garden in her Honda, and you have to make your girlfriend sit in the back seat, the relationship isn't going anywhere. If your mom is driving you anywhere, you're bound to hear the phrase "Aw, your first date!" which translates out to "Aw, this will go nowhere!"
I guess it'd be nice to have a girlfriend, but I can't imagine having one right now. I'm failing a class, school is getting tougher every day, I have no money or transportation, I have other problems, it's not like I have the energy to deal with a soul mate too. I guess this is why the super-human kids always have partners. Yeah, the ones who can manage a straight A average, a part time job, a girlfriend/boyfriend, chores, community center, sports, homework, yadda yadda. I don't know how they do it. I assume there's a secret organization that gives people a little pill that gives them perfect lives, and hides it all from me so I'm always an outcast.
okay i don't feel like writing anymore im gonna go play banjo kazooie
Mood:NORMAL
#3 Bank Robbery
Ugh, I hate my librarian. Every time I want to get on the computer she's just like "oh, you again". Then she's like "oh, computer 20, again? That's your favorite." And I am just like, "You know, I didn't come in here to have my every pattern played back to me like I'm a dog or something. Just give me any damn computer and cut it out. One time I went in there and the other librarian said "Now, don't be too loud in here." and Mrs. Nosy was all "Oh, he's the quietest person in the library, how ironic. And inside I am screaming like a dying baboon.
I can't stop thinking about how I would pull of the greatest bank robbery. I think it's just some guy thing, but whenever I see a huge hostage situation in a bank or something, my second or third reaction is usually "wow, how could I do that?". I don't even really want to rob a bank in real life, but just planning out the operation is loads of fun. Here's what I have so far.
First, I'll need a few goons to help me out. Recruiting them will be difficult. Although crack addicts would probably work for free, they're out of control and would probably overpower me if I gave them any weapon bigger than a thimble. I guess I could get some really close friends to help me, but they'd have to be my stupid friends who always carry a lighter and had "relations" with the family dog because they were bored (the sad part is that I'm not joking). I will first ask them if they want to help me pull of a heist, and if they agree right away and start asking me when we're going to do it, bingo. Of course, along the line they're going to be asking me about their share of the money, the greedy bastards. I'll have to do the robbing part of the robbery myself, so I can tuck a great portion of the money down my drawers and then split the other side with my friends. Also, I'm the one planning the damn thing so I get as much as I want.
I remember the movie Inside Man. That movie kicked assssss. I can't help but take a few ideas from it, such as dressing up as cleaners. Actually, scratch that. I have a better idea. I'm going to need someone working on the inside, someone easily manipulated. If I can't get one of my dog-humping friends to apply for a bank job, I can either A) Become friends with someone already employed, or B) recruit a crack addict. A crack addict would work in this situation because he knows he's going to get a share of the money, at least until I shoot him with my machine gun because that's how badass I am.
I'm going to dress up as The Joker during the heist, and not just because I like the look. I need to hide my identity from the hostages. I'm certainly not going to let them memorize each and every one of my facial features when I start monolouging and getting up in their grills. I could also act as crazy as I wanted to, and I could prance around saying I'm Heath Ledger, except this time I have a reason. And you might be asking, NachoMan, how are you going to get into a bank dressed as The Joker?
Well, I'll need to scan the bank out a few times. I probably can't go inside and just sit there for a few hours, looking where the security guards are placed. I'll need to just go in, set up a checking account, leave, then send in goons one by one to just start sitting around. It may look suspicious, but people are too cowardly to point these things out. Now that I have at least five goons in the building, I need to have another two goons (hired, not friends) to cut the power from far away so no silent alarms can be activated. Then I'll call them and say that there's only one other share. I'll tell them to fight to the death and whoever lives gets the share. That part is for my amusement, mostly.
The goons inside will activate sleeping gas grenades. I'm not sure where one would buy something like that but bank robbers seem to get them pretty easily. Maybe it's like that building in Harry Potter that only wizards can see, except bank robbers. Oh, I forgot to mention. By this point I will have dressed up as a construction worker and will have set police tape and traffic cones around the bank, making sure no cars come by. Then the goons will cover all the windows and doors after I come in, fully Jokered, and the heist begins.
Hmm. I can't exactly terrify the guards and such while they're asleep. I suppose there will be a few people less susceptible to the gas, so I can slap them around for a bit. Then I'll get the crack addict banker and have him open the vault for me.
At this point, the letter I sent to the police station will have arrived. They will open the letter, which will read:
"This is a signed statement from the mastermind that I have not, and will not hurt any of the civilians during today's heist. -- The Joker" Then when the guy unfolds the letter, he will read the word "boom" and then the letter will explode. BOOOOOOM. Oh, man, that'd be cool. So then the police's attention would be completely focused on tracking down the sender (which was sent from an anonymous mailbox). Of course, I'd need to find a way to be sure that the explosion would not take any lives. I may be a robber, but I'm not a killer.
After loading up the bags of money, I'll dispose of the crack addict's body, and run outside. I'll get one of those sucker vacuum cleaners and wheel it inside to take out all the gas. Then I'll dispose of the vacuum cleaner in the river, remove the traffic cones and such, and all six of us would drive away alone. When the people inside awake, they will only remember five men in black and The Joker, and the police will think they're crazy.
However, if a cop car happens to be driving by at the time, and catches us, the resulting car chase would be worth the years in prison. I've never said no to a good car chase.
So, that's my plan. I know there's probably a bunch of holes in it, but finding and filling in those holes is the best part of a good plan.
Mood:Scheming
#2 A Second Post
Why are the damn preps so determined to ruin the fun of being emo? Like, remember when you first started dressing in black? Nothing special, just black clothing? It was awesome! But now, these fricking preps with their perfect lives and expensive haircuts and their huge amounts of friends and social lives start ruining everything! They take it wayyyyyy beyond black clothes. Like, rainbow belts, baggy pants covered in chains. And I thought it would be okay if maybe they're depressed, but that's the thing: THEY'RE NOT. They're always happy and laughing and playing UNO, and talk about how their moms buy them the coolest clothes. Preps, what more do you have to take? You already took dressing in colors. What next?
Mood:PISSED
#1 Some Sorta Blog?
Hey children! I've decided I need to do something here, so to fill my time I've decided to write a blog. This blog won't really follow a plot or anything, it's more of a collection of the many monologues I write in my head every day but never bother to put anywhere.
Friday the 13th. Ominous.
Mood:Apathetic
