Lost Impact/1

Synopsis

Noxigar reads Bell Quest and gives Bling his own adventure.

Transcript

BLING: Gee, it sure is boring around here.

BELLSTROM: MAH BOI, this peace is what all true warriors strive for!

BLING: Can we please start the Jeffersons?

BELLSTROM: No, Homsar is doing that.

BLING: I want to do something!

BELLSTROM: Bling, every time you've been left alone, you got kidnapped!

BLING: It's your fault for leaving me alone in your house, Bellstrom!

BELLSTROM: {groans} Alright, you can go on your own adventure. That adventure will be to the moon.

BLING: Oh boy, the moon!

BELLSTROM: You have to promise that you won't get kidnapped again.

BLING: How hard could a promise like that be?

BELLSTROM: Just promise already!

{Bling rolls his eyes.}

BLING: I promise to not get kidnapped again, and to eat all the boxes of Captain Crunch I had you buy for me so I could win that sweepstakes.

BELLSTROM: Good, now to the moon we go!

BLING: Can I bring some friends?

BELLSTROM: I suppose, just don't bring too many...

{Bling runs out of the house through the front door. He sees a diamondhead snake.}

BLING: Hey, dimondhead snake. Want to come with me to the moon?

DIAMONDSNAKE: Oh, the moon! Sure, but I can't really see you. You're not hot enough.

{Laughtrack}

BLING: Let me carry you to some of my other friends.

{Bling and the Diamondhead Snake visit Bellson's house, ringing the doorbell. Bellson opens the front door.}

BELLSON: Aggh! A diamondhead snake!

DIAMONDSNAKE: Do you wish to go with me and Bling to the moon?

BELLSON: It does beat a whole Haruhi Suzumiya marathon, I suppose...

DIAMONDSNAKE: Do you mean just a bunch of reruns you've already seen in Japanese?

BELLSON: Kinda. They'll be in English.

DIAMONDSNAKE: Yeah, come with us to the moon please. Something eventful versus something uneventful and I feel all woozy inside. Almost like I want to bite you!

BELLSON: Don't!

DIAMONDSNAKE: 'Kay. Let's go.

{Bling, Bellson, and the Diamondhead Snake continue their journey, stopping by at a house. They knock, and Homeschool Winner opens the door.}

HOMESCHOOL: ...why do I want to go on the moon?

BLING: I want my own adventure because Bellstrom keeps hogging all of them.

HOMESCHOOL: I'll go, since you'll probably get kidnapped without me.

{Homeschool, Bling, Bellson, and the Diamondheaded Snake all walk to NASA. The NASA Commander stops them.}

NASA COMMANDER: No.

BLING: Why not?

NASA COMMANDER: By the time you all get there, you'll all be like, thirty-seven years old.

BLING: ...in a row?!

NASA COMMANDER: NO!

BLING: I wanted an adventure...

NASA COMMANDER: Don't involve the moon, man! It's not made out of cheese or anything! It's just a floating ball in space, where there is no oxygen and you'd probably freeze to death. Speaking of that, you could go freeze yourself on Mount Everest.